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5 of 6 people found the following review helpful
Author Pat G'Orge-Walker has penned a wonderful, wonderful book that will make you belly laugh, especially while you think of certain church members who could definitely be Mother Pray Onn or Mother Blister in "Cruisin' On Desperation."

This is one book I have to start off saying, "See, what had happened was..." The members of the Oh Lawd, Why Am I Still Single Singles Club could not take it another moment after a string of women were married in the summer of 2005. We are talking about women too old to get a man, or too ugly to get a man, and one who married a thug in order to get a man. Whatever the reason, the members of the Oh Lawd, Why Am I Still Single Singles Club had to come up with their best plot to get a man and get married. So the planning and plotting began.

Sis. Need Sum was the president of the Singles Club, and she was the one who made the final decisions concerning what they would do. By the time she consulted with Mother Blister, Birdie Tweet, Petunia, Cill and Ima Hell Raiser, they concocted a plan that included going on a cruise to get back at Lyon Lipps an ex-con who made a living taking advantage of women. Oh it was pay back time for real, with a side order of "get a man" while they were on the cruise.

The women were able to pull it off while doing things to slight each other at the same time. But as always, author G'orge-Walker will have you in stitches while she takes you on the journey in the lives of the characters as they begin to transform by the power of God. Important life lessons are in this comedic read, and you will find out that there is no need to worry about getting a man, getting married or anything else you think God should hurry and do with your help.

I would recommend this book to anyone who is desperate or anxious for God to do something in their lives but feel He needs a hand in making it come to fruition, and to those who really need a good laugh because I promise you, you are going to laugh from the beginning to the end. The questions that are asked at the end of the book will cause you to re-think some things and put others into proper perspective.

Reviewed by Sharel E. Gordon-Love

Apooo BookClub
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
Pat G'Orge-Walker is back! The latest book featuring the antics of Ain't Nobody Right But Us - All Others Going To Hell Church by this illustrious author, is yet another offering that proves that her talent for imagery is just as good as it's always been. You may remember her from the tales told emanating from her Sister Betty series of books. If you thought they were hilarious then, wait until you've met with the members of the `Oh-Lawd-Why-Am-I-Still-Single' church group on the current outing! The author in her new book, Cruisin' On Desperation, curtails their antics rather succinctly. Now, this is no ordinary group of ecclesiastical church abiding members. In my opinion, the one thing that stands out while reading this book is the characterization, and how the different settings mesh with a less than embellished storyline.

As a matter of fact, the latter is not indicative of how I rated the book...rather it's the way she allows each character to be the star of their own Diaspora while still managing to be a bridge to each other, which makes the difference. To this effect, the author does an outstanding job of allowing the characters to shine in lieu of a traditional storyline where plot, back-story, and setting are usually apropos. Each of them is aptly introduced, and the author did a good job of putting me in position to wonder which character I like best. Just when I thought one would win out, another would do something that would cause me to want to gain favor. I found out that no one character is solitary for my vote - they ALL win! But let me share with you a few of these characters in name only. You'll have to read the book to get the low down! Check out Sister Need Sum, twins Lyon and Lionel Lipps, Bea Blister, Slim Pickens, Ima Hellraiser, Birdie Tweet, Sasha Pray Onn...and then there's Southside Annie, Two Ton Sally, Patty Cake, et al.

Individually and collectively they their stories are magnified against irony's best adaptations. All of them are well past the age of maintaining and adhering to the amorous ways of love, you'd think. But this bunch gives new meaning to things least expected, with each of them drawn together for the sake of fellowship that goes the wrong way. The first few chapters center on their usual meeting place to haggle and complain about the slim pickings in the little town of Pelzer, South Carolina. Do they have any legitimate reason to cast aspersions? Should they be afforded a man like everybody else? "You betcha!" they say in unison. To wit: When newcomer Birdie Tweet's new beau, Lyon Lipps, proves to be more than what is seen on the surface all hell breaks loose. A con artist extraordinaire, he seduces every member of their group...and the girls are chomping at the bit for revenge! If payback is exacting, this illustrious group gives it new meaning. What do they do? The girls decide to go on a cruise, and this sets the stage for the title of the book to bring justice to what revenge is to be for these feisty ladies. They use all of their wily skills to coerce Lyon into going too. No easy task, but as a last resort they then decide to enlist the help of Pelzer's most alluring --and vindictive young woman, Ima Hellraiser, and the rest is pure chaos and hilarity. Blasphemous things can happen on the high seas on a cruise, this one takes the cake. No strangers to disorderly conduct, the group is in high gear causing scenes, betraying one another, amid adjusting halos gone awry. With plenty of laughs and a few revelations along the way, the girls are on a mission - doing it their way!

If this were your initial introduction to Sister Betty and her raucous crew, you would truly be missing more of what this group is about as I suggest aligning yourself with past offerings. I love this book, and of course anxiously await any and all of what Pat G'Orge Walker produces in this line. I rated the book 5 stars out 5 and recommend it for anyone needing a laugh or two while reading a real page-turner.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
When was the last time you have a deep belly crying laugh? Well, that was too long ago. The ladies in the Oh Lawd, Why Am I Still Single Singles Club will have you hootn' and hollerin over their conversations and plan to get back at Lyon Lipps. Their names and personalities alone bring about a chuckle; let me tell you about them. Cill and Petunia argued amongst each other but they were the mild ones in the group. Mother Blister was older than dirt, would forget her thoughts in mid-sentence, and had lost control of her bladder. Sister Need Sum (Needy) was the president of the club and clearly ran the show. Birdie Tweet is rich and doesn't mind throwing her money around. It just happens that she is the first and only white sister in the group.

Their plan was complex; see they tricked Lyon Lipps into believing that he won a cruise on the ship desperation. The ladies would create chaos on board, make Lyon's life hell all while enjoying a much needed vacation. However, the club can't do it all themselves they called in reinforcements: Sister Ima Hellraiser daughter of Sister Areel Hellraiser and Mother Pray Onn. The antics of these `church folk' come to a screeching halt when the Holy Spirit shows up and shows out. The drama is still working at home because Cill and Petunia can't make the trip but their hands are full trying to uncover dirt at home while dealing with Ima's cat, Evilene.

CRUISIN' ON DESPERATION offers a comedic twist on stereotypical church ladies. Be ready to laugh at the development and execution of the mission to destroy one man. The only problem is that in order to complete their task they will learn the real meaning of living for God. There are times when the action lags and the antics of Mother Pray Onn and Mother Blister are unbelievable. Watch out for Evilene because she out of control. G'Orge-Walker out does herself with this novel. So get ready for your jaws to ache because you won't be able to put this laugh out loud book down.

Reviewed By - Deltareviewer

For Real Page Turners
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
"Unbelievably witty adequately depicts Crusin' On Desperation by Pat G'Orge-Walker. This hillarious story will have readers laughing at these characters who are each unique in their very own way."

"Four members of the Oh Lawd Why Am I Still Single church group embark on a cruise aboard the "Desperation of the Seas" seeking revenge on a man that they feel has betrayed them."

"Will they get the revenge they seek or have these four women bitten off more than they can chew. This is truly an entertaining read filled with interesting characters that just might remind the reader of someone they know."
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
Pat G'Orge Walker has penned another hilarious tale in her latest, Cruisin' On Desperation. While the story has you cracking up with laughter, the overall message is clear: vengence belongs to the Lord and that there are times we are to just be still and wait on Him.

An excellent read!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
on September 21, 2007
The Church: Aint Nobody Right But Us

The Group: Oh Lawd Why Am I Still Single

The Members: Needy aka Sister Need Sum, Birdie aka the only white member, Cill, Petunia, Mother Blister

The Plan: Payback on Lyon Lipps for his womanizing ways

When a series of unsuspecting church sisters get married during the summer of 2005, the women of the "Oh Lawd Why Am I Still Single" church group are up in arms! They just don't understand why the Lord seems to have found a mate for every woman in Pelzer, SC but them. When one of their former members gets hitched it's just too much for the women to bear. With just under one month left before the end of the season, they each vow to get a man. When new member Birdie, the wealthy and only white member of the group, shows the women a photo of the handsome man she was going to be hooking up with - things kick into high gear. Not only do they recognize him - they were his victims once upon a time and seek revenge. What better way to enact that revenge than on a ship where the only means of escape from these determined sisters would be to jump overboard! Their plans to find mates are put on the backburner as pay back for Lionel is priority. Retribution is even that much sweeter when gullible Birdie agrees to foot the bill.

So begins the drama and gut-busting humor of this original tale by Pat G'orge-Walker. The characters are like none I have read of before, the dialogue nothing short of hilarious, and the scenarios are just too funny for words. Two characters in particular (Mother Blister and Mother Pray On) peaked my interest. The antics those two carried on with had me saying "Oh no she didn't". While comedic the book also carries a spiritual message that was subtle yet crystal clear. Kudos to Pat G'orge-Walker for this exceptional, very recommendable novel.

Englishruler
ARC Book Club Inc.
Star Rating: 5 Stars
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
on May 1, 2007
A group of women in the Oh Lawd, Why Am I Still Single Singles Club get together for their regular meeting and discover Lyon Lipps has victimized many of them. While they are all determined to find the perfect husband for themselves, some of them realize they must take care of him first. Ima Hellraiser leads the charge and they decide to tell him he won a cruise on the ship Desperation. Sisters Need Sum, Birdie Tweet, Ima Hellraiser, Mothers Bea Blister and Sasha Pray Onn will be on the cruise with him, which is being financed by Birdie Tweet, the only white woman of the group. The trouble begins when Mother Blister starts a row getting on the ship because it was taking too long while she stood in the hot sun and it continues. In an attempt to get back at her aunt, Mother Pray Onn, Ima puts her in the cabin with Mother Blister since they despise one another. The two Mothers get kicked out of the dining room for creating a disturbance and then the Federales actually escort them out of Mexico and back to the ship. Ima and Needy have problems of their own. They did not realize just how handsome and sexy Lyon Lipps is. Could this put a snag in the program to destroy him? Meanwhile, Birdie who has been bullied into spending tons of cash by Ima, finds her backbone and stands up for herself for the first time ever.

CRUISIN' ON DESPERATION by Pat G'Orge-Walker is a laugh-out-loud tale from the prologue all the way to the end. Even the names are far out. Each of the characters is so developed you can actually feel what they feel and their physical descriptions are magnificent and hilarious. I even found myself sympathizing and laughing at Eveline, Ima's bad acting cat who knows just how to exact revenge. The story is realistic and at the same time absolutely wild. All of the women are from the Ain't Nobody Saved But Us - All Others Goin To Hell Church, which in itself is a trip. Once you pick this book up, you can't put it down.

Reviewed by Alice Holman

of The RAWSISTAZ Reviewers
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
VINE VOICEon January 31, 2009
The steamy green eyes, banana curves, and other adjectives that would indicate `this one is young, or gorgeous, or an absolute titan', I couldn't help but imagine a cast of seventy year-old (if not older) characters cruisin' on hilarity. This was the only hiccup as I struggled separating the oddball cast. Fellowship just wasn't cutting it, especially not with the way they behaved. I can't imagine hanging with my mother and her friends on a cruise; and definitely not long enough to write a full-length novel about it.

None-the-less, with that hiccup out of the way, this still was the funniest book I think I have ever read!!! I mean, I've read books where I've laughed here and there, but coiled in the frivolous spats and hilarious quips, I laughed far more than here or there. Every page I was either smiling, laughing, or down on my knees ROTFLMAO! Need Sum, as the name alone denotes, was plenty funny, while Mother Sasha Pray Onn (& you just have to love that name too!), and Mother Blister, hands down (or up) carried the novel.

And to answer question 7 at the back of the book: Yes, in the name of fellowship and serving God, they overacted to Lyon's flaky (at best) criminal transgressions. It floored me that AFTER Needy would conspire to ruin Lyon (good Gawd, if that wasn't the pot calling the kettle black) and then get to the end where her sins apparently washed away, becoming holy enough to have the audacity to snatch a Bible out of Lionel's hand and start quoting verses in it. "Let's see how this fits your smug mind," she says before reading Colossians 3:13 and 14. OMG!

But I laughed enough to give Cruisin' on Desperation a solid FIVE!!! Great Story Telling and superlative humor! Glad I bought it!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
I finished reading "Cruisin' On Desperation" by Pat G'Orge Walker last night! There are few words to describe what she wrote! It was awesome! Funny! Entertaining! Enlighting!

This was one of those books that have that reglious theme, but very funny. The characters she choose and the names were so unique and funny. When I first ran cross the name of the church and stuff, I was compeletly stunned. At first I was like, "Is she serioius?" But She was and it was so funny! The things she had her characters do was so hiliarous. The extent that someone would go to! WOW!

This is a great read! Make sure you get your copy!!!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
on March 3, 2010
I bought this book after having read enthusiastic reviewer accolades. Unfortunately, it just didn't work for me.

To be fair, I don't want to call it boring (which it was to me) without an explantion. The comedic approach was not my style. This does not mean that the book is a flop, but I do believe it will not be embraced by a wide audience. Be forewarned: if you do not enjoy over-the-top comedy,you probably will not enjoy this book.

On the other hand, if you are looking for the "Airplane,"I'm Gonna Get You Suka" type of absurd comedy with a Churchified theme, this is the book for you. No disrespect intended.
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