Customer Reviews

CultureShock! France: A Survival Guide to Customs and Etiquette (Cultureshock France: A Survival Guide to Customs & Etiquette)

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(6)
3 star:		(5)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(3)

 

 

Full disclosure: Though British myself, I live on the outskirts of Paris. I speak French. My wife is French and I have close French friends. I think this gives me an almost unique perspective on the French and their way of life. I am close enough to be able to get an insider's look at them, yet different enough to be super-critical when I feel like it!

Now here's the other interesting thing about my situation: I work for an American Company and I have a lot of American friends. Like many Brits, I feel a certain closeness to USA, even if we find you exasperating at times (just like you probably find us)!

Let's be positive first and give you the good news about 'Culture Shock: France'. I agree with my fellow reviewer (Seattle 29 June 2000) that it cuts to the heart of some of the areas where Americans and the French often don't communicate well. Sally Adamson Taylor explains why some people find the French to be rude and why the French often find Americans to be rude (Don't look so shocked! Or maybe you've not tried to communicate with a New York cabbie recently!) - and remember that in any place some people will be rude no matter what you do.

However, as my fellow reviewer observes, this book offers sound behavioural tips to overcome any cultural differences... like if you're invited to a French person's home, "Don't go sticking your nose into your host's refrigerator" ... hey do you guys REALLY do that?
"Don't open the conversation by telling your host how much you earn."... do you REALLY do that too?
"Try using a knife and fork - it's not as difficult as it looks." ... so what do you normally use - chopsticks?
You see what I mean about cultural differences.

But this brings me to the negative side of the book... Sally Adamson Taylor has, quite simply got some things wrong. Whilst she offers a whole host of useful tips and observations, she describes some of them badly. The section, for example, about the handshake as picked up by my fellow reviewer. I can assure you that nearly all the handshakes offered me are firm with plenty of eye contact. Not the limp-wrist specimens that the author suggests. Maybe she mixes with the wrong crowd.

The one observation that the author has correctly picked up (from Luigi Barzini in his book "The Europeans") is that `Foreigners have to remind themselves that they are not dealing with a country that really exists... but with a country that most Frenchmen dream still exists. The gap between the two is a large one, but the French indefatigably try to ignore it or forget it.'

That tells you more about France than anything I or Sally Adamson Taylor can say!

I received this book from my sister, who has visited France several times and who speaks the language fluently. She knows the ins and the outs and knew that though I was very excited about my trip I was also nervous. What if they really DO hate Americans? What if they really are as rude as people say? What if, what, if, what if.....I worried that maybe I was not making a good choice for our first trip to a European country that did not speak English as their primary language. I read the book like a crazy person. A lot of the ideas were simple, but things that eased my transition. Speak softly, say hello ALWAYS, when going into a shop, even if you are just looking around and always say thank you and good bye when leaving. Don't smile and make a lot of eye contact on the street with strangers. Understand that going to dinner is an event-don't rush it, and when you want the check ASK for it, or you will be there forever....they do not just slap the bill on your table as soon as, or (gasp), before you finish your meal. You could literally nurse one glass of wine for 2 hours, they don't care. Know that, and slow your pace and enjoy it. Don't be annoyed and think you are getting poor service. Understand that tips are included in most establishments, but that an extra % up to 5% is appreciated for good service. Know that the job of being a wait person there is different than here, they know food and wine and are happy to make recommendations-that is their job and they are very good at it and pride themselves on a job well done. They are efficient and helpful. They are not, however the staff at TGI Fridays-they don't come up to your table, with "flare" on and say "Hi, my name is Rudy and I'll be your waiter". If that is the kind of interaction you need, you should probably skip Paris altogether. Oh, and PLEASE, don't go into a nice restaurant and ask loudly if you can have ketchup for your steak-this is the kind of American that the French just can't stand.

I learned some French before going, and always tried to make an attempt to speak the language instead of assuming they were all English speakers and I was in some French version of Disneyland.

I found the French people nothing but kind and welcoming to us. If you respect their culture and make attempts to adapt to their way of life they were friendly and helpful. We visited many of the Arrondisements (divisions) and found this to be true whether we were in a tourist section, or farther off the beaten path.

I found this book to be extremely helpful to me. Do I think all of the information applied? No, there were some areas that didn't, but all in all I got many good pieces of information I would not have otherwise known, and it made my trip a more pleasurable experience.

I highly recommend this book, and would seek it out for other countries that I would visit so I could learn more about the culture before going.

Full disclosure: I myself haven't been to France. I speak French and have close French friends, though, and have invested a good deal of reading and discussion in comprehending French ways of thought and action.

This said, what I really liked about this book was that it cut to the heart of some of the areas where my own people (United States) and the French often don't communicate well. Taylor, who has lived a long time in France, explains quite credibly why it is some people find the French to be rude. How shocking to find out that they consider *us* rude. In any event, what makes this book attractive is that it offers sound behavioural tips and suggestions to break these boundaries and have a good time, always bearing in mind that in any place some people will be rude no matter what you do.

A simple example, without spoiling the book for you. In my homeland, the American West, a limp handshake with no eye contact (especially between males) often causes distrust or gives actual offense. In France, we are told (and I have verified), to fail to greet the shopkeeper, waiter or whomever ranks at the same level: a slap in the face. This is what I mean about the book: having read it, you would enter the little knickknack shop and politely say 'bonjour, madame' to the proprietrix, and give her the time of day, avoiding a pitfall you'd otherwise maybe not have known existed.

I think this book should be read with an open mind. Everything in it that I could test on French people tested accurately. I think it would be a significant help for anyone who plans travel to France or who regularly interacts with French people.

This book will be most helpful for people who are going to MOVE to France, or at least spend a LOT of time there. And in that regard it is mostly about the Parisian mind, although not exclusively. However, let me note that it is also a fun read for anyone simply interested in French culture.

I read it on the plane on the way to France. I think most importantly, it is a fun read and a cool cultural icebreaker. It prepares you for other people's reactions to you. As with most over-simplified descriptions of an entire culture, it is not guaranteed to be 100% true in all cases.

This book will tell you that the French don't smile (at least not like Californians do) and if you smile too much you will look stupid to them.

It gives tips for getting a job, receiving your mail, using the phone, getting an apartment, what wines to drink, and how to act as a guest in the home of the French.

As a tourist I used the information a several of times. I learned why I shouldn't ask a policeman for directions, what magic phrases to use to elicit help from any Frenchperson, and that the French would understand if I cut in front of them in line if it was really important to me to do so (say, that's good to know!)

This book is very well-written - sections on home life, fashion and nudity, and conversation are particularly informative. As a person who enjoys conversation, it was nice to read that the French really enjoy conversation and regard it as drama. But two aspects should have been more discussed less forgivingly: French rudeness (she advises to play the rudeness game; although in my 3 visits I have only once been treated rudely, I don't consider rudenes to be a game) and the fact that the French are really judgemental about how a person dresses (as she says - no one would dream of wearing shorts in Paris). However, Kudos to the French for not getting as paranoid about sexual harassment as here in Amerca!

I was glad to read this book and Sally Adamson Taylor was pretty good at describing the French and, to sum it up, if you are rude to the French they'll be rude right back! It cuts through the stupid stereotypes such as Jerry Lewis, (no French person I know care about him and I know a lot of French! )and lots of Americans seem to always gear for battles before going to France thinking they are going to be spit in the face as soon as they get out of the airport! Don't worry. This book shows you that the French are not that bad after all! But it will let you know how to "act" in stores (just say hello) and all the little things that make a stay much more enjoyable.

Of all the culture guides to France this is my favorite. Taylor has done a great job of characterizing French culture at all levels. Her style is clear and succinct and she offers a lot of examples throughout the book regarding etiquette and proper French behavior. There is tons of practical information (with a title so named) and an interesting chapter on culture shock for Americans moving to France. There are better guides, I think, to business life in France, or certainly for visiting or touring, but for a general introduction to why the French act like the French this one's the best.

While I enjoy Taylor's writing style and personal flair, there are lots of errors in this book. There are things that will get you hurt (like the section that vastly overstates the safety of bicycling here) or get you into social trouble (like the section that states most French people don't know much about wine and they don't have to because it's "quality controlled" -- please never EVER say that to a French person! It's not true! This is their culture and they are all extremely proud of their wine knowledge because the wine reflects the character of each region).

I'm not French, but my boyfriend is French (Parisian, actually) and we've been living here in the South of France for three months. It was a new book that arrived in his office, so he gave it to me to read, hoping it would help my transition here. Unfortunately, I kept finding things that just didn't line up at all with what I'd experienced or didn't ring true for some reason. I'd relate one thing after another to him of what I was reading and he'd have to correct it. I then thought to look for the author's qualifications to write the book and wasn't convinced they were really there.

Anyway, there are definitely some things that are correct, especially where Taylor states that one should use their French, even if their grammar and vocabulary isn't perfect. And I could appreciate the part where she talks about moderating one's voice in public. (It's a pretty common foible for Americans to raise their voices.) I give her three stars for the general information that's right and a well-organized, well-written book. But I would not recommend this for someone who knows nothing about French culture. In fact, if someone knows a really good book on French culture shock, please tell me. We would love to know!

I read this book before going on a yearlong exchange to France, and I certainly took it with me. It was extremely useful. For someone unaware of the culture, something like this is a necessity! It doesn't say too much, however, about French friendships.
I also find that it doesn't adequately reflect the diversity of France: the South-- Marseille, or Aix-en-Provence-- are different from the Northwest-- Vannes-- and Paris is something else althogether. So: good, but I found not everything in the book was altogether true. Keep in mind, people and reigons are still different!

I find the "Culture Shock" series to be pretty interesting. To gain some perspective, read the book on your own culture to see how accurate the author is regarding you (British, French, American, etc). What I've found from traveling all over the world for work is learning a couple of phrases in the native language goes a LONG way toward making friends. I keep a little journal with me and have a few useful phrases and translations of certain key words, numbers, etc. Be polite and smile. You will always make mistakes, but if you show interest in the culture, people will generally go out of their way to help you. These books are probably not for the average tourist, but can be quite helpful for those working or spending an extended amount of time in-country. Remember, at the basic level, we are all pretty much the same; treat others as you wish to be treated. Enjoy!