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The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared ParentingAreTransforming the American Family
 
 
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The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared ParentingAreTransforming the American Family (Hardcover)

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The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared ParentingAreTransforming the American Family + The Stay-at-Home Dad Handbook
  • This item: The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared ParentingAreTransforming the American Family by Jeremy Adam Smith

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Editorial Reviews

Review

"Jeremy Adam Smith writes so well and so honestly about his love of staying home with his son, about the economics of his family life, and about the politics of our nation at large. Whoever doesn't already think the public and the domestic are linked needs to read his work."

—Miriam Peskowitz, author of The Truth behind the Mommy Wars and coauthor of The Daring Book for Girls

"Forty years ago, a man who wanted to share child care equally with his wife would have been called ‘deviant,’ and a wife who wanted him to would have been condemned as an ‘unnatural’ mother. The Daddy Shift shows how far we have come and how much we have to gain by completing this revolution in marriage and parenthood."

—Stephanie Coontz, author of Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage

 
"The Daddy Shift skillfully melds factual and historical data with a style that brings to life these important issues of family, parenting, and fatherhood."

—Shira Tarrant, Professor of Women's Studies at California State University, Long Beach, author, When Sex Became Gender
 
"Jeremy Adam Smith says what I wish I could about the politics of fatherhood and what it means to be a dad dedicated to equity, change, and social justice for our children and for all children."

—Jason Sperber, blogger, Rice Daddies
 

"Most books about fatherhood work from the outside in, from big structural changes to their impact on new dads. It’s far more difficult to work from the inside out, to locate your own experiences in those larger patterns. Like William Blake’s ‘world in a grain of sand,’ Jeremy Adam Smith’s book invites readers to identify with the mundane, and then slowly expands the frame to reveal the bigger picture. The Daddy Shift is impassioned and insightful, careful and compassionate."

—Michael S. Kimmel, author of Guyland and Manhood in America: A Cultural History

"The Daddy Shift is a major contribution to a growing field. Both Jeremy Adam Smith’s research and his personal observations cast valuable light on a topic that’s vital to us all, no matter our gender or whether we parent."

—Lisa Jervis, founding editor of Bitch: Feminist Response to Pop Culture

"His investigations are very well researched, and he's pursued them with a rigorous intellectual integrity that makes his arguments engagingly persuasive. The result is an impressive book that even the childless should read, for at essence, The Daddy Shift is not just about stay-at-home dads, but about the changing roles of men and women in society."

—mothering



Product Description

A revealing look at stay-at-home fatherhood—for men, their families, and for American societyI

t’s a growing phenomenon among American families: fathers who cut back on paid work to focus on raising children. But what happens when dads stay home? What do stay-at-home fathers struggle with—and what do they rejoice in? How does taking up the mother’s traditional role affect a father’s relationship with his partner, children, and extended family? And what does stay-at-home fatherhood mean for the larger society?

In chapters that alternate between large-scale analysis and intimate portraits of men and their families, journalist Jeremy Adam Smith traces the complications, myths, psychology, sociology, and history of a new set of social relationships with far-reaching implications. As the American economy faces its greatest crisis since the Great Depression, Smith reveals that many mothers today have the ability to support families and fathers are no longer narrowly defined by their ability to make money—they have the capacity to be caregivers as well.

The result, Smith argues, is a startling evolutionary advance in the American family, one that will help families better survive the twenty-first century. As Smith explains, stay-at-home dads represent a logical culmination of fifty years of family change, from a time when the idea of men caring for children was literally inconceivable, to a new era when at-home dads are a small but growing part of the landscape. Their numbers and cultural importance will continue to rise—and Smith argues that they must rise, as the unstable, global, creative, technological economy makes flexible gender roles both more possible and more desirable.

But the stories of real people form the heart of this book: couples from every part of the country and every walk of life. They range from working class to affluent, and they are black, white, Asian, and Latino. We meet Chien, who came to Kansas City as a refugee from the Vietnam War and today takes care of a growing family; Kent, a midwestern dad who nursed his son through life-threatening disabilities (and Kent’s wife, Misun, who has never doubted for a moment that breadwinning is the best thing she can do for her family); Ta-Nehisi, a writer in Harlem who sees involved fatherhood as "the ultimate service to black people"; Michael, a gay stay-at-home dad in Oakland who enjoys a profoundly loving and egalitarian partnership with his husband; and many others. Through their stories, we discover that as America has evolved and diversified, so has fatherhood.


Product Details

  • Hardcover: 256 pages
  • Publisher: Beacon Press (June 1, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0807021202
  • ISBN-13: 978-0807021200
  • Product Dimensions: 8.9 x 6.2 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
  • Amazon.com Sales Rank: #408,270 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

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The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared ParentingAreTransforming the American Family
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Refreshing, July 3, 2009
By Marc A. Vachon (Watertown, MA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   
I sat on this book for quite a while. My reluctance stemmed from an expectation that this was going to be a dry academic review of childraising dads. Boy, was I wrong. Yes, it does put the shifting of gender roles in perspective but in a way that was totally accessible to me.

The couples profiled are real and Smith does more than introduce us to them. He shares their history, context, struggles and desires for the lives they are tending. The couples are complex with varied motivations and don't fit neatly into any preconceived notions of existing family models.

Beyond the personal stories we also get the long view of how men's views have changed in relation to caregiving. I found the information compelling and thought provoking. I loved the "myths of caregiving fatherhood." Ranging from the myth that Dads opting out of work is a luxury of the educated elites to the myth that the decision for a man to stay home with children is always an economic one.

This book stares down the stereotypes around male nurturing and offers explanations, willing examples, and historical trends to highlight the changes happening all around us.

I'm not a stay at home dad but rather part of the masses of men who do more childcare than their own fathers. I recognized myself in this book and would recommend it without hesitation.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Finally, someone who gets it., September 17, 2009
By M. Schneider (New York, NY) - See all my reviews
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With his latest book, The Daddy Shift, Jeremy Adam Smith sets out to explore the "movement of fatherhood from solely breadwinning to both breadwinning and caregiving." He does this by drawing on data from various fields of study (economic, religious, sociological, psychological), as well as examples of real families with "reverse traditional" caregiving/breadwinning models. This mix makes the book very readable, and also provides food-for-thought to draw on as each of our families find our own way.

Certainly we see the shift that Smith describes within our at-home Dads group, but I also see a shift for my dad friends who work full time outside the home. Most fathers I know are very involved with their families and are proactive home cooks, laundry washers and folders, dishwashers, etc. I see many Dads at pick-up and drop-off at my son's pre-school. Dads organize playdates. Dads make doctor's appointments. It seems to me that no aspect of family life is the exclusive domain of one parent over the other. Smith's research points to a gender convergence, "an ever increasing similarity in how men and women live and what they want from their lives."

Smith's research also helps to debunk the many myths associated with dads as caregivers. Though my decision has always felt natural and reasonable, like many stay-at-home dads, I have felt the little jabs coming from the outside world--the lady on the street that asked, "Where's Mommy? Baby needs his Mommy" or the preacher that claims stay-at-home dads are lazy and going to hell because we don't provide for our family, or the legislator from Missouri that excludes stay-at-home fathers from legislation because "Mothers are natural nurturers. Fathers are not. It goes back to the hunter and gatherers type." Smith addresses each of these myths and many others to conclude that "caregiving dads are ordinary guys of many cultures and educational levels who have a range of motivations for taking care of kids."

The Daddy Shift is an excellent read for all parents looking to find balance and truly enjoy and appreciate their families. Smith asserts that the successful twenty-first-century family needs "to prize time with children and to feel grateful for each other's contributions and sacrifices, whatever they may be." Cheers to that . . .
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5.0 out of 5 stars An intriguing look at changes in American parenting, September 14, 2009
By Midwest Book Review (Oregon, WI USA) - See all my reviews
Fifty years ago, it would have been heresy for a father to stay home as the mother brought home the paycheck. "The Daddy Shift: How Stay-at-Home Dads, Breadwinning Moms, and Shared Parenting Are Transforming the American Family" tells the story of the changing American culture on its stance towards parenting and gender issues. No longer is the father forced to break his back to feed his family, or the mother forced to abandon career ambitions, and Jeremy Smith argues the positives of this changing American Dream. "The Daddy Shift" is an intriguing look at changes in American parenting, recommended.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Jeremy Adam Smith Knocks Fatherhood Out of the Park!
As a filmmaker who is making a documentary on the same subject matter as "The Daddy Shift," I've read tons of books on fatherhood, but I have to say that Smith's book is probably... Read more
Published 2 months ago by Dana Glazer

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