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Dads and Daughters: How to Inspire, Understand, and Support Your Daughter When She's Growing Up So Fast Paperback – May 13, 2003
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From Library Journal
Copyright 2002 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
---Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia: Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls
"Joe Kelly points the way for fathers to help raise empowered and healthy daughters---a longtime feminist goal. Dads and Daughters is must reading for men and women alike who want to change the world their daughters will inherit."
---Leslie R. Wolfe, Ph.D., president of the Center for Women Policy Studies
"Dads and Daughters should go on the required reading list of every one of us dads who want to raise healthy and strong daughters."
---David Walsh, Ph.D., President and Founder, National Institute on Media and the Family
"Dads and Daughters does what a good advice book should do: respect its readers while offering them real guidance and help. Joe Kelly knows it's tough to navigate the passage from girl to woman in our culture, and he knows that fathers can make a big difference in their daughters' lives. He is able to laugh at himself, to reveal his own struggles, and to empathize with the fathers he's addressing. But he holds his readers to a high standard because he knows how important fathers are. Dads and Daughters challenges and invites fathers to listen-to their daughters, of course, but also to each other. This is a book that will make fathers want to learn how to stay close to their daughters, and it is a book that will show them how."
---Susannah Sheffer, author of A Sense of Self: Listening to Homeschooled Adolescent Girls
"I've been a big fan of Joe Kelly ever since I started receiving his Dads and Daughters newsletter across my computer screen. I've shared his organization's literature with the thousands of girls and their families in Girls on the Run. And now at last he has written a book that pulls so much of his message, his insight and his passion into one place. Dads and Daughters offers both practical advice AND a strong voice for the millions of dads out there who want to engage themselves in their daughter's lives and improve the dad and daughter bond."
---Molly Barker, Founder and CEO, Girls on the Run International, www.girlsontherun.org
From the Hardcover edition.
More About the Author
Kelly is a primary media source on fathering healthy daughters, appearing on NBC's Today Show, NPR's Talk of the Nation, CBS's Early Show, MSNBC, Lifetime, Fox News Channel and Voice of America, as well as in Time, People, New York Times, USA Today, Wall Street Journal, Parenting and dozens of other outlets. He has written for Parents and Mothering magazines, among others, and is an expert for Mothering.com.
Dr. Mary Pipher calls Kelly's best-selling book Dads and Daughters "an essential aid for the fathers of adolescent girls." It is based on his conversations with thousands of fathers across the country, more than a decade of speaking and writing on the subject, and 25 years experience as the father of twin daughters.
In 1993, Kelly and his wife Nancy Gruver founded the groundbreaking international publication, New Moon: The Magazine for Girls and Their Dreams. Edited by girls 8 to 14 years old, New Moon is the only child-edited publication to win the prestigious Parent s Choice Foundation Gold Award multiple times. Gruver and Kelly won Parenting magazine's 1995 Parenting Achievement Award.
In 2004, Kelly was named the Women's Sports Foundations Title IX Father of the Year and won the national Eating Disorders Coalition s Activist of the Year award. In 2001, he was iParenting.com's Dad of the Year. He belongs to the National Practitioners Network for Fathers and Families, Center for Family Policy and Practice, and serves on the board of the Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood.
Kelly's leadership on girls' issues, fathering, and media activism puts him in wide contact with fathers, girls, families, teachers, and other professionals who work with girls. He speaks and teaches frequently on fathering, media and marketing's impact on children, and successful strategies for raising girls and boys. Kelly has spoken before the National Association of Independent Schools, National Association of Science and Technology Centers, American Association of University Women, National Eating Disorders Association, and dozens of other conferences. He also has testified before the Congressional Children's Caucus, President Bush s blue ribbon Title IX commission, and the Food and Drug Administration.
Kelly and Gruver live in Duluth, Minnesota. Their adult twin daughters, Mavis Gruver and Nia Kelly, live in California. A New Jersey native, Kelly, 51, is the author of the play This Horse of a Body of Mine, co-editor of four nonfiction books for girls, and was an award-winning journalist for Minnesota Public Radio. He has a BS in philosophy and journalism from the University of Wisconsin-Superior.
Top Customer Reviews
There are two things that are almost universally true for all fathers of daughters. 1.) We don't talk to anyone at all about our jobs as parents. 2.) We did not grow up as girls (Ok, this one is universally true.) What Joe Kelly does in Dads and Daughters is point out that these are two of several major hurdles we must accomplish to be good dads. Luckily, he also provides great information on how to overcome these hurdles.
Covering the first hurdle brings surprises. In his research, Joe interviewed dozens of fathers from all walks of life. In that research he found common themes. Themes that each of us as dads of daughters know to be true for us, but have no idea that there is another soul on the planet with the same concerns, the same desires, the same stories. He points to our lack of father to father communication and says, "here are some ways to fix that."
The second hurdle is obvious once stated but not so clear until then. We grew up as boys, and generally find girls as perplexing as we did when we were their age. That is a problem for a grown up boy given the task of raising a girl.Read more ›
Dads and Daughters is a MUST read for any man with a daughter, and for any woman who ever had a father. It is robust proof of the power of fathers' words - a power that developmental psychology or other science just doesn't provide in the same way.
The book's foundation is the author's inspiring vision of fatherhood. This vision involves the dad who might on Monday write a letter to a company protesting an ad that promotes unhealthy body images for girls. On Tuesday he patiently sits at the dining room table and listens to his daughter describe a problem, while limiting himself to facilitating her effort to solve or resolve it on her own. On Wednesday, he gets dirty with her playing soccer. On Thursday, they talk about boys and he shares, with honesty and openness the good and bad she can anticipate in her relationships. On Friday, he swallows the feeling of rejection when she's angry with him and won't even say why, and he ends up seeking advice from another dad he's friends with. On Saturday, his patience pays off and he accepts her invitation to help out in a volunteer activity she's organizing. And on Sunday he asks her to help in return, fixing a leak under the kitchen sink with him--making sure she learns how the plumbing works in the process.
Not every dad does all of this, but what a great world it would be if they did and this book can help more fathers assess themselves and turn more of their parenting potential into a reality.
I was confused about how one section deals with teaching girls that their self worth is not tied up in their bodies, then giving dads the advice to allow a daughter to wear provocative clothing. I quote, "wearing sexy clothing is a normal adolescent behavior". Some daughters might be all the better for allowing boys to ogle them, but mine better keep the receipt.
I say no thank you to most of the advice given in this book. Dad isn't meant to be a passive listener and enabler. Sometimes, Dad is supposed to put his foot down and say that some things are unnacceptable.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Having a girl is awesome but daddies could use s little help understandingPublished 6 months ago by susan s.
I did not enjoy this book at all. It doesn't relate to the current decade. I found It's too general of information. Kind of common sense stuff I already know.Published 13 months ago by Brian P
This book really details the preteens and teens minds. It helps the parent understand a little more of what's going on in their world and how we can handle it.Published on January 15, 2014 by geri giangarra
This book has really helped not only my husband understand our daughter but myself as well. I loved learning about what teenagers think when the media unleash their storm of what... Read morePublished on March 19, 2013 by jjones
Fathers are the primary male role models in a girl’s life. Sometimes their modeling is for the better and other times for the worst. Read morePublished on February 19, 2013 by Bradley L Kautz
It's a great book with lots of helpful tips for dads and moms. Even if you're the best dad out there, this is a must have book in your library.Published on December 28, 2012 by Mom of 4
This is a good book but I was looking more for a book with practical advice on specific issues. This book basically says that religion is the key overcoming all obstacles. Read morePublished on November 29, 2008 by Nick
I thought this was a pretty good book although the fearmongering was a bit much for me. I felt so much fear and despair after reading it I wanted to curl up in a closet with my... Read morePublished on June 27, 2008 by Craig Clotfelter