Customer Reviews

The Dance of Defiance: A Mother and Son Journey With Oppositional Defiant Disorder

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(2)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

This book is a terrific book. It is inspirational and informative. Although Nancy's son is dx w/ ODD this book is wonderful if your child has any sort of neurological or biological dissability that manifests itself in behavior...adhd, ocd, odd, bipolar, autism etc.... After reading the book I feel that someone else out there 'gets' what I am going through. She also makes very practical suggestions by sharing her journey of the types of individuals and professionals that can help you w/ your child.

This book has some definite plusses. It is an easy read, and I would imagine that it makes any parent struggling to deal with ODD feel less alone.

What I didn't like about the book was that there were not very many practical ideas or solutions. The author painstakingly describes year after miserable year with her son and goes into excruciating detail about interventions that showed promise but didn't work. Then suddenly in the end of the book the problems seem to just clear up.

I work with kids who have ODD in my job at a school. While this book did provide me with more sympathy for the parents I work with, I didn't feel it gave me any direction or new ideas for my work. Instead it made me feel rather hopeless and helpless. If you are going to read this book, I would definitely reccommend reading a more practical book along with it. I found The Explosive Child very helpful.

This book really hit home. I was so relieved to see someone else had struggled thru and survived. Nancy Hagener's honesty is so refreshing. Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!

If you have a child with ODD then you often feel alone. Many people do not see the child that you deal with on a daily bases. Hagener opens up and shares her story with her ODD son. It is great to read someone else who is going through something similar. If you have an ODD child then I would recommend you pick it up for that reason alone. However, the writing is not as great as it could be. The book is full of incomplete ideas, and half written stories. The timeline is extremely unstructured and highly confusing. It seems like it just skims the surface and doesn't quite dip under it. The end is uplifting - if not abrupt. But it is nice to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The book does have a Christian flavor - nothing offensive to non Christians. But is a definite part of the authors life. Despite the writing - this book is still a good motivational read.

My ODD children (yes, plural-I have two!) are adults now and until we read this book, we had no idea WHAT was making our family dynamic so out of control. Chapter Four with the clinical definition truly set us free! Both have found amazing doctors who have given them life-changing, personality transforming medications. They call them their happy pills and both are still exactly who they were, just better! Thank you, Nancy! We know love in our family in a deeper way because of you!

My son was diagnosed with ODD in the 2nd grade. After 7 years of behavior modification, it quit working. At 14, the adolescent hormones have begun and just as other children are becoming more defiant at this age, my son, as usual, went to the extreme. He became uncontrollable. At one point this past summer, I thought all hope was lost for his future. Thankfully, with God's help, things are looking better. The struggle is not over, but he is back home, attending weekly therapy sessions with a therapist who has worked with ODD cases (children and adult) for over 20 years, and we are in the process of neuro-psych testing to rule out aspergers, ADHD, depression, and others. I thank God everyday that he is safe and has never been ajudicated. I'm told that the love, patience, and attempts to understand my son without labeling him (children are children, not their flaws!)have been great helps to him over the years. I constantly remind him that my love for him is unconditional. I have also told him that we all make mistakes, it's how we handle those mistakes that matters. I still have never heard the words, "I love you, Mom" uttered from his mouth, but I know he does from the few glances of thoughtfulness he gives me from time to time. When reading this book, I decided to highlight anything I had experienced. I was amazed when my highlighter ran out of ink. This book gave me hope that I can help my son through these teenage years, trying by themselves, but more so for him because of the ODD. Thank you Nancy Hagemeyer for writing the book I wish I had 7 years ago!

This book was a breath of fresh air in comparison to those written by therapists who have only "treated" other people's children instead of actually living with a child with ODD. Having a child with ODD I can relate to this book almost entirely. However, I really was hoping for more examples of experiences that the mother and son went through---especially at school to see, if at all, any solutions that came about due to this behavior at school. This, to me, is the most frustrating of all experiences with ODD because it is so hard to help out with kid's behavior once they are not in your presence.

I LOVED the teacher tips and tips for parents and thought they were right on target and will work most of the time. This is a great book for parents to read to see what options are out there for their ODD child but I just wanted more situations to try to relate to is all.

Although you can certainly feel this Mom's pain there are very few practical strategies listed for dealing with ODD either at home or in the educational setting. I was extremely disappointed in this book for those reasons. She stated she had a wonderful family, doctors, teachers but very little on what they actually did.

I loved the book and have shared with co-workers, friends and family. This mom's journal parallels my own 14 yr journey with my ODD son and through her words gave me that little boost of reassurance that someone out there understands.
I didn't share the book for factual, diagnostic information or how to's, I shared because it's real and from the heart. Since no one else sees what takes place within the home, it is very difficult (for me) to put into words or explain to others why one I'm always so beat down and operating below capacity. The author's words help paint that picture so others might understand.

I was actually given this book by my pediatrician after I took my son in for a behavioral issue. He does NOT have ODD. I think the doc gave me the book so I would feel better about the tantrums and the behaviors of my "typical" two year old. It worked! I applaud the authors persistence and drive to find help for her child. She is an amazing woman, and this is an amazing story. A recommended read for any parent, in my humble opinion....