Customer Reviews

The Dance of Fear: Rising Above Anxiety, Fear, and Shame to Be Your Best and Bravest Self

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The Dance of Fear is the book formerly known as Fear and Other Uninvited Guests. The name change most likely came as the result of author Harriet Lerner's other Dance book titles - Dance of Anger, Dance of Intimacy, Dance of Deception and so on.

Lerner uses her experiences, patients' experiences, and other people's experiences - a valuable way to teach what fear is as it has many meanings and situations that bring it on. She doesn't throw, "Do this..." out there or make claims you'll get past your fear in one day. Instead, she shares the stories of several patients who had to deal with a challenge over a period of time.

Lerner covers rejection, anxiety, change, the workplace, looks, and when things fall apart. When it comes to addressing fear, only one thing is guaranteed - one solution does not fit all. What helped Anne Morrow Lindbergh cope with the loss of her infant son won't necessarily work for someone else.

The message is that we all face fear in spite of our education, knowledge, courage, or any other characteristic that supposedly makes a person fearless. When we accept fear as a natural occurrence in our lives, we learn to deal with it better than if we didn't accept that.

Some who see a book classified as psychology or self-help run away. It's understandable as such books can be too sugary sweet, too philosophical, full of annoying affirmations, or full of exercises. This one has none of these characteristics. Heck, it makes you laugh. It doesn't even mention OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) and it has a drop of panic attacks, but not from someone who is dealing with panic / anxiety disorder. It's about the fear all humans experience, not just those with an illness.

As a result of this book, I walk away with a better understanding of fear and its cousins, shame and anxiety. I'm not cured of anything. Instead I have gained insight into this strong emotion and should have a better handle on it the next time I dance with it.

The Dance of Fear has none of the big words that Lerner learned in medical school. Instead of quoting complex theories, she uses meaningful quotes you may have come across. The outcome is a book that reads like a friend wrote it and who happens to be knowledgeable on this topic.

Anxiety, panice attack and depression, these are all clinical problems that sometimes need medication, but you can't get a complete cure unless you remove the sourse of them. You need to increase your wisdom to better see the problem. I found this book amazing in this job. You can feel the ocean of wisdom in her words.

Rebeccasreads highly recommends THE DANCE OF FEAR as book about the tangled tango of life with people -- sometimes you lead & sometimes you follow, & if you know what makes you tick, who's doing what isn't nearly as important as who's in charge of you, & that talking it out is the one thing that really helps.

Dr. Lerner doesn't write trite self-help hand books, the questions she asks & the answers people give her set the scene for her articulate insights. Take time to read THE DANCE OF FEAR because it's about what these emotions are, how we behave because of them, what harm happens when we don't know what's driving us, & how we react to events, great & small, that have us frozen in the headlights or hiding away from life.

It's good book for someone with light to moderate fear issues, but doesn't seem to have enough substance to help those with deep set fear and anxiety.

This book is a good resource for those struggling with anxiety and depression. Another great resource for facilitating personal transformation and overcoming anxiety, anger and other forms of emotional stress is mindfulness. I also recommend 'The Path of Mindfulness Meditation' available through Amazon.

This is a great book...all of Harriet Lerner's books are great. If you are looking for advice on how to not let fear take over opportunity in your life, this book will give you a great start.

I read this book after having read The Dance of Intimacy several months ago. The Dance of Intimacy was like a huge wake-up call for me, whereas this book was very interesting and helpful, just not as earth-shattering. I am generally an anxious person, and I did learn a little bit about living with my anxiety and not making it worse. But I didn't connect with all the stories the way I did with the previous Lerner book I read. I still think Harriet Lerner is an amazing insightful woman. I'm glad that I read and bought this book, but maybe my expectations were a little too high. I would give the book 3 1/2 stars if I could.

Great book and good way to understand how to manage your anxieties and fears. This book will not make your fears go away, but rather enable you to work with them. A pratical approach.

As a woman who has struggled for most of her adult life with anxiety and shame, this book was a Godsend. Like Lerner's other titles -- particularly The Mother Dance -- this book is fun and easy to read. But the clarity and lightness of her style allows her to deliver profound insight and practical advice at once. Brilliant!

This book helped me see some things about myself more clearly. I recognized myself in many of the examples and now I know what I can work to change.