Darkside Zodiac [Paperback]

Stella Hyde (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 1, 2004

Aren't Cancerians fed up with being the mothers of the universe? Don't Leos become weary of being told they're just fun-loving party animals? Does a girl--or boy--ever get to flash their mean streak? Do they ever--in Darkside Zodiac, the book that exposes the hidden underside of the stars, and how they affect the dark side of everyone.

The zodiac definitely has a dark side that influences the nasty in every one under every sign:

When Scorpios shed their Ms. Manners persona out pops a sex-mad control freak.

Capricorns are really bean-counting misanthropes.

Aries are head banging psychos.

Aquarians can't wait to be beamed back to the mothership.

Darkside Zodiac covers personalities, rising sign, ruling planet, Moon, qualities, and elements. It also details lifestyle choices (jobs, vacations, fashion, interior design, partners) all from a gripping, yet rarely discussed perspective.

Product Details

• Paperback: 400 pages
• Publisher: Weiser Books; Original edition (March 1, 2004)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1578633109
• ISBN-13: 978-1578633104
• Product Dimensions: 7.4 x 6.1 x 1.1 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.7 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (36 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #230,606 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Discover books, learn about writers, read author blogs, and more.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

31 of 32 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Amusing but hard to read says bossy pig-headed fusspot :-) May 19, 2005

By Groovy Vegan VINE™ VOICE

Format:Paperback

As astrologers know, each sign has its positive and negative qualities. What if an astrologer with a dry sense of humor looked only at the negative qualities? (And as a double Capricorn myself, is there any other kind? :-) The result is the sometimes hilarious, sometimes mildly amusing, but always funny "Darkside Zodiac" by Sheila Hyde.

Much like any beginning astrology book, Hyde begins with a discussion of the four elements (fire, earth, air and water) and the three qualities (cardinal, fixed, and mutable). According to Hyde's take, as a Capricorn, I'm a bossy pig-headed fusspot. My last boyfriend, a Scorpio, was a stubborn moody whiner. The boyfriend before him, a Pisces, was a fickle moody whiner.

After the brief intro section, there's a section for each sun sign, where among other things, you can match your ascendant with you sun sign to determine your personality, check where your Mars is to determine how you mishandle aggression, check where your Venus is to determine how unfortunate you are in love, match yourself up with your partner's sun sign to see what disasters will ensue, and even how you handle toothpaste. I laughed at how Capricorns handle toothpaste which is to tightly roll it from the bottom up, then when it's finished to unroll it, cut it open, and scrape off the last smears. I've actually done this! Some of Hyde's funniest writing is in the "Dream Jobs" section. One of the dream jobs for Aries is firefighter, "fire, danger, big sharp axes, shiny red appliances to ride on..." Another amusing thing is the pictures of the zodiac signs, clever but dark interpretations of their traditional pictures, which are found on the cover and at the beginning of each sun sign.... Virgo is wearing a chastity belt, the bottom Pisces fish is a fish skeleton, the Gemini Twins are frowning, and poor Cancer the crab has been boiled in a pot. If you don't know your moon nor rising sign, there's a rough ephemeris chart in the back to determine moon sign, and instructions on how to approximate rising sign. But to have the exact information on these and other planets, it's best to look at a chart (there are places on the internet where you can get them for free) or consult a dedicated ephemeris.

One big problem for this over-40 reader was that the pages all have colored backgrounds and black print, some of which were quite difficult to read unless I was directly under a light source. The deep blue background of Pisces was especially difficult to read and the dark red of Aries and hot pink of Taurus were also challenging. The challenge of reading some of these pages detracted from my enjoyment of the book.

Overall, the book is amusing and worth checking out of the library. Read more ›

15 of 15 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Hysterical - loved it March 19, 2007

By J. Griffin

Format:Paperback

This book is ridiculously funny.

Caveat: as the author herself warns, this is not for the faint of heart. If you can't laugh at yourself (or your friends), this is not the book for you. If, however, you can deal with a little tongue-in-cheek cynicism and equal-opportunity send-ups of all 12 signs, this book will provide hours of teasing your friends and loved ones, while surreptitiously tearing out the pages of your own sign and hiding them where no one can find them.

Speaking as an Aries - I put up a good front. I have a carefully - very carefully - maintained facade as a sane, intelligent, enlightened human being, fit for civilized company. But once in a blue moon, while it's not what anyone in their right mind would call "flattering," it IS rather refreshing to see someone call me on it - someone who knows that under that thin innocuous veneer of decency lies a seething, rage-filled, carnivorous soul, bent on fire and destruction and entirely unreasonable, one which has no truck with such niceties as patience or logic, not when there's people out there who just... won't... do... what... I... SAY!!! *face turns red as fist slams through desk*

Ahem. Sorry about that. Where was I?

The information in the book is exaggerated and distorted (of course!) for maximum comic impact; the basis of it, though, is pretty astrologically accurate. My only complaint is with the quick-and-dirty moon sign chart in the back, which kept trying to put my moon in Taurus (it's in Gemini) - but then, the book does say it's only an approximation, and gives the address for a very nice website that will give you a complete chart for free. So that's ok then....

And again, the true value of the book lies not in pointing out your own hidden darkness (because you already knew all about that!) No, it's in what it has to say about *everyone else*. Point and laugh at your Cancer roommate when they get the sulks - again. Snicker behind your hand at the Taurean and his cake habit. Call your Gemini best friend on it when he tries to fast-talk you into a bad idea - AGAIN. Tell your Scorpio buddy - wait. Maybe that's a bad idea. Just... quietly back away from your Scorpio buddy. And don't make eye contact.

All kidding aside, it's a really fun book. If you have any interest in astrology, or just want a chuckle, check it out. Read more ›

17 of 18 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars hilariously cynical December 26, 2004

By Helen Scott

Format:Paperback

I'm pretty sure this is the only book that has ever made me laugh so hard that I cried. Most days the glossed over brightside astrology can be really annoying and this book is a wonderfully refreshing book to laugh at yourself...and others. I enjoyed it because I know at least one person for every sign. Some people may not like it, like my mother, who said "why are you reading that? it's says horrible things about you!", but at least I didn't mind. Some of the negative traits are a little exaggerated (like all pisces being drug addicts), but it still makes it funny. You will get the most enjoyment out of the book if you, like me, actually beleive in astrology and the basic character traits do apply to you. I think I laughed the hardest when she wrote about the pisces room/house and about my collection of random string that may be useful at some point....and then looking over at my shelf with my random string that may be useful at some point. Even if the things don't apply to you, it's still funny to read for any of the signs because it is so cynical and clever.

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Humblingly accurate September 5, 2004

By Sharpchick

Format:Paperback

When you've read everything about how cool your Sun sign is, and are ready to move on the dark stuff you knew was there, but just hadn't admitted yet, get this book. I've studied astrology for years now, and even Linda Goodman (whose works I truly love) always manages to "spin" the negative characteristics I know I have into something positive. In the spirit of honesty though, I've always believed knowing your darkside can lead to being able to temper it a little.

The reviewer who was critical of the colored pages and text DOES have a point - the ones I found most difficult to read were the dark blue pages with lighter typeface. But I resolved that by getting directly under my overhead light to read (the reading lamp just seemed to cast a glare on the page, making it more difficult to read). I mention this for any readers who have visual impairments, particularly with contrast.

Overall, though, great read, and definitely a book I will keep in my library.