Customer Reviews

Dateable: Are You? Are They?

5 star:		(34)
4 star:		(10)
3 star:		(4)
2 star:		(1)
1 star:		(19)

 

 

"Dateable" has to be one of the best books I've read in awhile. In fact, I wish I'd read it a few months ago when I was going through a tough time with a guy. But the facts in this book have made me realize the mistakes I made and how I should feel about the mistakes he made.

This funny yet truthful book is blunt and to-the-point, no matter how much it hurts. It explains exactly how guys' and girls' minds work, and now I know that I haven't been judging teenage guys too harshly--they really are as perverted as I thought! Justin Lookadoo and Hayley DiMarco explain that any guy, even if he is a Christian, is going to be a guy first. There are also fun quizzes and doodles throughout the book.

I think this is a great book for any teenager. My outlook on so many things has changed now. One thing the authors suggested was, when you're with a guy, imagine that someone is taking pictures of what you're doing, and then showing them to your parents, pastor, grandma, etc. How would you feel about what you were doing? This made me realize that some things, even though they seem right, must be saved for marriage.

I also like that the book isn't one-sided and doesn't force opinions on people. It said things like "kissing, hugging, and holding hands while dating is okay. But if you believe that kissing is wrong, then don't do it." It also said a lot of truths about girls--like the fact that girls like bad boys, but they'll just hurt them in the end, so nice guys should take on the adventuresome traits that bad boys have, but not the jerky traits.

I don't agree with "Spiderfriend" and "a reader" (who wrote a review on July 17, 2004), who don't like the idea of the authors portraying guys as pansies. The thing is, readers, most guys these days are wimps who expect the girls to do all the work. I think this book encourages guys to not be like that. Maybe the fact that guys should be the leaders in relationships is old-fashioned, but it is the way God intended relationships to be.

"Dateable" immediately caught my attention when I first saw it at a bookstore. When I read through this Christian book, I found it very helpful, truthful, and funny. A little hurtful, but hey, sometimes the truth hurts.

Justin Lookadoo and Hayley Morgan gives the readers an inside scoop on what our opposite sex does not want us to know. They tell us what both guys think and what girls think.

Personally, I thought each page in this book was very creative. The authors put in quizzes, little drawings, and comments on the side of the page. They point out how the way things begin will the way things will end.

This book offers many steps on what one should take when they enter a relationship. Girls, don't get hooked by the bait that your guy throws to every girl. Hold out and hold on. Guys, stay consistent, control what you say, and be powerful.

I strongly suggest reading this book, the authors gives personal examples that the readers might relate to. Check it out!

Now I'd like to start off by saying that I have not read this whole book. I found it in my 15 year old sister's bedroom, chuckled, picked it up, and read a few pages from various sections. So if you'd like to dismiss my opinion based on that, I don't have to tell you that you have every right to do so.

I'm not going to say that you should not buy this book, as much as I believe that these authors need to reeducate themselves before attempting to develop a sequel or any book based on relationships or having to do with "facts" or "reality." However, I must point out that this book is based solely on generalizations and stereotypes among teens today. In some instances, I agree that, sure, something they say may be true more than 50% of the time. But when they stand behind their opinion so strongly to say things like "Don't forget, in the end, no matter how sweet he is, he is male first. And that means he has one goal, and that is the physical pay-off," I can't really stand idly by, being a male myself, and not call that too bold of a statement. Other instances such as "Well, yeah, when the guy says he loves you, he really means it. Seriously. He does. He loves you. And he loves his mom. He loves his car, his dog, and pizza. He loves winning the game," are very common, in which the authors use sarcasm aimed at teens to induce a sense of foolishness.

Though this book was written by both a male and female author, it's sole purpose seems to be to strengthen the opinion that all males engage in relationships just for sex. Everything they do is done for themselves.

Voicing an opinion is fine, it provides entertainment and useful information for you to use if you ever meet someone who opposes that opinion. In this case, however, the authors go about changing the readers' opinion in a destructive way. It makes girls afraid to date. It attempts to makes teens believe that the relationship they're in doesn't stand a chance by outright saying "Whatever relationship you are in right now, know this: It will not last. Period. The end. I know, you are sooo into this guy or girl - but understand that this relationship will not last. You will break up. It will end."

Oh, and that leads me to one of the most interesting parts of the book: "Guys are thoughtful. They put time and effort into finding out what works for them and what doesn't. If what a guy says o you is believable, it's because he has practiced it. He has polished the words to perfection. Question: Where do you think he polished it? On his buds? Uh, that would be no. He fine-tuned his finesse on other girls. He played the game many times before using the exact same lines he's using on you. Yeah, I know, all that's over for him now that he found you. He was clownin' when he was with them, but he finally found you and now he means it. Right. And the tooth fairy left me a dollar last night too."

What this book does is attempt to destroy any faith in real feelings. It doesn't even have the decency to use the words "maybe" or "mostly" or "could," just "is" "is" "is."

If you're going to buy this book, buy it for entertainment purposes only. There isn't a sentence within its pages that contain an ounce of faith, and without that, they all lead to an untrue, hopeless abyss.

This book was so helpful on getting to know how the oppsite sex thinks and how teen relationships should be portrayed. The book brought new light on many situations and emotions that teenagers feel during relationships. Rather than having ideas and "hot to's" on dating, the book made the reader ask themselves if they were ready to date, and what some of the consequences-and benefits were. I really appreaciated both author's points of views on the subjects--Morgan was more helpful on getting through to girl's emontions, and Lookadoo was definiately more to-the-point. Some memorable points they brought up were that girls should not take the lead in relationships, and that guys should take control when they ask people out. Although many may be offended that the book tells girls that they are too chatty and need to be mysterious and that many Christian guys are becoming weaker, the steryotypes tend to be true in our society today. The book's points were emphasized by the straightforward, playful design and fun games and quizzes in between. Overall, Dateable is a book that should be read by all teens who are ready to understand teen dating and how teenage guys and girls think.

I like reading books giving advice on the opposite sex and tips in how us girls can take that in mind with the way we approach guys, talk to them, etc.--according to what sort of personality we have. That's why when I found Dateable in the bookstore, I was interested to buy and read it.
Throughout the book, there were some VERY helpful and insightful points and then there was the rest of the book. Lookadoo explains repeatedly that breakups are a lot less painful when you don't put as much of yourself into the relationship rather than baring all of yourself at once. Now, I think to keep a relationship up and running, it requires the guy and the girl to put themselves out on that line that will either bring a lot of happiness or heartbreak. While I think it is good to limit the amount of information you give to other people you are wanting to get to know romantically (at first), I also know that it's a necessity of growing up to experience heartache and deep, happy relationships. If people are going to learn what they want for marriage, they need to date and experience life. If everybody just waited until they were adults and old enough to get married, they'd have the same amount of intelligence on love and relationships as an adolescent and we'd never find the right person.

Lookadoo also makes it a big point to just give up on relationships when you're a teenager because adolescents can't fall in love and it's not going to work out anyway. Plus, according to Lookadoo, if you try to make a relationship work when you're a teenager--you're just practicing for divorce. I think a big reason people even get divorced today is because they're to lazy to try and focus on the trivial parts of the marriage. Isn't just giving up before anything ever happens between the two people practicing divorce?

Lookadoo also proved to be very sexist towards both boys and girls. He tells girls in his chapter: "Girls, Shut Up" that we need to play hard to get and be mysterious so the guys will feel victorious when they finally win you--basically, to just be a trophy for the guys to win. Then he tells shy guys to stop being wimps and be a man. And girls aren't supposed to ask guys out because it makes them feel even more wimpish. I think the author spends too much time throughout the book stereotyping both guys and girls and doesn't realize that everyone is an individual and may/may not agree with his his opinions. That's the biggest problem with this book: he fails to be diverse and tend to different types of scenarios and people.

I felt offended by one particular drawing in the book. Another reviewer mentioned on here that she was offended by the quote: "if girl's dress like a piece of meat, they're gonna be thrown on the b-b-q." Thing is, it's very true. Not all guys, but there are some guys who will take advantage of girls and their emotions if they think the girls easy. I'm not stupid in this subject--I've seen it happen enough to know. So in that respect, I really agree with Lookadoo. But at the same time, he needs to encourage girls to be themselves and not wear clothes that don't flatter their figures because it will draw bad attention. And Lookadoo didn't need to take it to the extent of drawing a picture of a shop that sells women's body parts. I pretty much got the point with his words--he didn't need to draw a human delicatessen.

My point: I didn't really like this book as a whole. But, at the same time,I was able to keep my mind open and found some really profound statements that have helped with past and present relationships. I don't prohibit or recommend this book. As you can see, people really liked or hated this book. All I ask is to keep an open mind.

So, this is how it goes, this book is a definate must-read for any teenager wanting to date. I am in that column and am having guy-troubles...so I picked it up and read it. For a Christian, it is important to keep focus on both God and whatever else is going on in your life. Justin and Hayley (the authors) understand that just not dating is not gonna happen for most teenagers...so they are offering a way to date that is best for us. They tell us exactly what we need to know to date and love Jesus and not fall...it's important stuff, I know from experience.

We bought this book for my daughter who has just started a relationship. This book teaches almost the opposite of what we have been teaching at home. The author instructs that dating should be just for fun. He also states quite vehemently that their dating relationships will not last, but also says that dating is practice for marriage. How is having multiple dating partners in High school a good practice for having a lifelong committment down the road? We need to teach our daughters to date responsibly. A better book to read is "The Truth About Guys" by Chad Eastman. It reveals things about guys while building a girl's self-esteem.

This book is possibly one of the most... insanely creative teen dating books I've ever read. I myself am fresh out of college. I heard this was a good book, and not realizing the target audience was teenagers, I bought it, and the companion Datable Rules. The book is very well written. A little... odd, but very creative. The doodles on every page will keep any teenager's attention. I found them a bit distracting, but they tend to be very useful visual tools when making a point.
Each chapter is well thought out and put together. Even though not all the examples they used applied to myself, the examples they did use would fit well with what teenagers are doing.
If you are a young adult and pick this book up, it's not a bad read. It gets straight to the point in many areas. If you're new to the dating scene as a young adult and are totally confused as to what's going on with girls and guys, what you should do or not do, the book does give some good clear outlines to start from.
Dateable also will give a few other books for both guys and gals to extend their reading into.
Ya, go ahead and read it. If you don't like it, give it to someone else or donate it to your church/public/school library.

ok look....justin lookadoo isn't saying that EVERY single relationship won't last. what he is saying is that there is a VERY high chance that it won't last....soooo don't do things you aren't ready to do...to keep a relationship that isn't likely to last anyways. I absolutely loved the book. I told all of my fellow teenage Christian friends that they HAVE to read it. and by the way...my school is pretty small....and the guys and girls hang out together a lot. We hear about all of their dating disasters....When girls call them first they don't really like them...they just use them. Now, I'm not saying that there aren't any exceptions but this is what normally happens. So, stop dogging Justin Lookadoo for trying to help us....

and to all of you trying to live a life for God while dating....Please go read the book!!!!!!!

Justin Lookadoo came and spoke at my school and I was not impressed. In fact, he offended me so much that I considered complaining to the administration. On his website, Justin writes to girls:

"Accept your Girly-ness - You're a girl. Be proud of all that means. You are soft, you are gentle, you are woman. Don't try to be a guy. Guys like you because you are different from them. So let your girly-ness soar."

"Be Mysterious - Dateable girls know how to shut up. They don't monopolize the conversation. They don't tell everyone everything about themselves. They save some for later. They listen more than they gab."

"Let him lead - God made guys as leaders. Dateable girls get that and let him do guy things, get a door, open a ketchup bottle. They relax and let guys be guys. Which means they don't ask him out!!!"

"Need Him - Dateable girls know that guys need to be needed. A Dateable girl isn't Miss Independent. She knows we are made for community. Needing each other is part of faith. She allows him to be needed at times, knowing he was called to serve just as much as she was."

So basically, the perfect girl is soft and girly, quiet and doesn't voice her mind, submissive, and dependent on men. What kind of message is this for America's girls? A girl should be allowed to ask any guy she wants on a date, be as tomboyish and as outspoken as she wishes, and never submit to a man just because he has different reproductive organs! This man is sexist and an incredibly bad influence on girls and guys alike. He has crazy generalized ideas about gender that he markets as Christian-based...Christian parents: If you want to teach your children about relationships, teach them yourselves! Don't let Lookadoo corrupt them and their independence!