Customer Reviews

Daughter of the Saints: Growing Up in Polygamy

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3 star:		(4)
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1 star:		(2)

 

 

This was obviously a difficult book to write after years of silence as a way of life for a woman who grew up in a plural marriage. Dorothy's father, Rulon C. Allred, believed he was called to live in the Principle of Plural Marriage, which was dissolved by the church elders in 1890. Dorothy is the twenty-eighth of forty-eight children and has a unique perspective, a child among many siblings with an intimate view of the daily lives of sister-wives, as the women called themselves. Sister-wives formed a mutual support system, sharing chores and the rearing of children, as well as their husband.

Over the years, political pressure was put upon the Church of the Latter Day Saints to desist from plural marriages and confine their member to monogamy. Still, there were those who held to the fundamentalist tenets of a patriarchal religion that allowed a man more than one wife on his path toward sainthood. Eventually, many of these families were fragmented in order to avoid arrest; either that, or they moved where they would not be prosecuted, to such countries as Mexico. The Allred's fled to Mexico to avoid the law, but it was inhospitable, barely endurable for a growing tribe whose basic needs were barely met. Rulon would leave the family compound in Mexico, returning to Utah to maintain his chiropractic office with his one legal wife, who remained in Utah.

This is an shocking story, as the author reveals the hardships endured by the extended families of men who practiced The Principle. Besides the fact that first wives agonized over whether to participate in the marriages, there was the human dissatisfaction of sharing a husband, although most sister-wives succumbed to intense pressure from the men. At least they had a choice in the matter. None of the children had a choice and it is the children who suffered from a lifestyle that forced them to lie about family circumstances and constantly uprooted them from place to place to avoid their parent's being sent to jail. This only made their lives more tenuous, both children and wives making money by whatever means possible.

The author grapples with her love for her father and his complicity in causing such hardship for his children. While she faces most of the difficult truths, there is a constant tendency to rationalize Rulon's behavior, especially after he is murdered by another fanatical faction of polygamists. In the end, it is telling that Solomon chooses monogamy for herself, as do many of her siblings. However, the psychological damage to the children is immeasurable; such problems as incest and child abuse are virtually ignored, rather than bring attention to the family lifestyle. Yet Solomon is as rigorous as she is able in assessing her life in such an archaic arrangement, dedicated to speaking her truths and shining light into the darkness:" The family orchards are bearing their harvest and some of it is bitter." Luan Gaines/2004.

I was moved by Solomon's courage in speaking so honestly about her upbringing in a polygamist world. In this articulate, reflective, and often poetic memoir, she captures the beauty and suffering which come from living a hidden life among an abundance of family--where she is both comforted and lost. Being an intelligent, strong-willed child, she ultimately cannot accept a lifestyle where women aren't allowed to question their predicament and are expected to dedicate their lives to God by sharing a husband and birthing numerous children. In this courageous memoir, Solomon tells stories of her upbringing, speaking with love and empathy for her family yet refusing to paint a false picture of what it means to be a child of polygamy. Her intention, clearly, is to tell the truth.

If you want to know what it's really like growing up in polygamy and living "the principle", forget Big Love and Jon Krakauer. Go to the source. Dorothy Solomon is the "middle child" in a family of 48 brothers and sisters. She is the daughter of murdered polygamist leader Rulon Allred. She knows what she is talking about. And she is an award-winning writer. If language matters to you, read this book. It was originally published in hardcover by Norton, for heaven's sake; it's hard to get published by Norton.

Dorothy Solomon is a writer who dared to go deep in this unflinching look at her own unique life. I was truly riveted by the story, but that is only half of Daughter of the Saints' appeal. The rest lies in the brilliant way in which the background is told. Solomon's voice is both rich and nuanced, searing and delicate. Her father is shown as a flawed yet noble man. The many women who shared his bed through plural marriage are faceted as well. I was awed by the delicate way Solomon articulated her emotional path from pologamy to monogamy. May there be many, many more books in this talented writer's future!

Daughter of the Saints is a long-time labor over a difficult subject and with many risks. Much of the intrique in the book is the unconscious recognition by the reader that this author is unusual in the sense that she'd even consider wrting about such a bizare upbringing. Anyone who has even considered expressing non-consenting views of one's own family and especially their religion---no matter how strange---must have a strong constitution, sense of conscience and determination. It takes great skill, sensitivity and fairness to pull off such an undertaking---and still there were tough repercussions from family and true believers. Though it was not the intent nor was it possible to give an in-depth evaluation or critique of of this unique American life style, the book goes a long way toward educating and bringing to awareness the wide-spread existence and practices of such Mormon beliefs, their many splinters and their considerable good-bad (?)influences in the lives of so many.
David Allred
Redding, Calif.

This memoir was a captivating read. Dorothy Allred Solomon writes openly about problems in FLDS (Fundamentalist Latter Day Saint) polygamist communities; however, she does not pick apart any of the problems within the larger mainstream LDS church, though the parellels between FLDS and LDS are glaring throughout the book.

It is well-written and highly recommended.

This is a great book if you like this type of book. It was one that you want to stay up all night to finish.

I tore through this memoir in a couple of days. I could not put it down. This woman's account of her life as a fugitive and a "trouble maker" is incredible and heartwrenching. It's so much more interesting to me if I know someone actually went through this. I can't imagine ever living in the kind of poverty this family did, or having to share my father or see my mother's hidden tears when her husband went off with another wife (or 6) a few nights a week. Allred does a pretty thorough job going through the genealogy and geographic movements of her family and it only serves to bring the tale even more to life. I'm sure I could go read newspaper articles about all she mentioned, and read the very journal Byron wrote in his travels. It's great to be able to trace everything all over the US and watch the world change around the family and the church and yet nothing ever really changes for them. I very much recommend this book to anyone looking to find out more about this controversial issue. See it from the eyes of a young girl lost in a sea of many.

One of the best depictions, of the many I've read, by women who escaped from the life of Fundamentalist Mormonism or more specifically, polygamy.

The author of this book is Dorothy Allred Solomon
daughter of Rulon Allred. He was the head of a group
of polygamists in Utah/CO/AZ. There were around 3,000
people in his group. He had 16 wives and 48 children.

Dorothy loved her dad very much but she was not happy
being raised in polygamy. That meant no birth certificates,
no marriage licenses, always running, hiding,feeling like an
outsider, lying to keep the peace, doubts and angst. There
was conflict among the wives/mothers. Her mother was
one of the weakest and most timid.

Dorothy was never abused but abuse was all around her.
She relates several very sad stories.

Insane Ervil LeBaron would have her father murdered. Ervil's
teen wife....Rena Chynoweth was tried for murder.

Dorothy is married, has kids and grandkids and is happy.
She and her husband have a successful consulting company.

Her dad always told her *REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE*.
DOROTHY DOES REMEMBER WHO SHE IS. She is
a fine lady.

There are NO pictures in this book. I like to see photos of the
people I am reading about. Some of the history given will not
interest you.

I like the way Dorothy writes....its almost poetry. Every
sentence has meaning and thought behind it.

*MUST READ..SHATTERED DREAMS, HIS FAVORITE
WIFE & DAUGHTERS OF ZION.

+ Interesting fact... Irene LeBaron Spencer's mother was
Rulon Allreds sister. Irene is Dorothy's cousin. Irene wrote
Shattered Dreams.