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Each and every week Clea Hantman delivers advice to the girls at Girlsense.com in her spunky and straightforward Super Clea column. You can visit her at www.GettingOverTheDork.com. She lives in San Diego, California.
30 Days to Getting Over the Dork You Used to Call Your Boyfriend by Clea Hantman was surprisingly cute, clean, and uplifting. The book is split up into five sections, one for each stage of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance), with specific activities and reading for each day.
It's easy to say, "Stop moping and move on," but harder to do. Throughout the book, readers are encouraged to get up off of the couch and dance, to reconnect with friends and with themselves. They are never told to be vengeful or rude. It's less about the ex and more about you. It does not inspire selfishness nor grudges, but rather, self-confidence and optimism.
My favorite section is Day Seventeen: Give a Little Bit, which begins on page 85. This chapter is all about giving back. "There are a zillion ways for you to volunteer. The trick is finding one that's right for you." "For example, you may not teach children how to read, but you can help those children." If you want to donate your time to a worthy organization or cause but don't know where to start, this chapter provides some great ideas, such as hosting or participating in walk-a-thon, volunteering, and donating your old clothes.
30 Days is rife with cool pick-me-up ideas, activities, and surveys. The book even closes with lists of celebrities who have been dumped or have dumped others. The point is this happens to everyone, and you'll be okay. With quirky writing, personal anecdotes from the author, and a song at the end of every chapter, this book is sure to make teens laugh out loud. Laughter is the best medicine, after all, and what a great way to start healing.
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A breakup can seem like the end of the world to a teenage girl. Clea Hantman, author of the new book 30 DAYS TO GETTING OVER THE DORK YOU USED TO CALL YOUR BOYFRIEND, realizes this and treats her readers with sensitivity. But along with offering some advice and perspective, Hantman also offers a lot of fun.
When you're mourning the loss of a relationship, she writes, you go through the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. The book is divided into parts based on these five stages, and for each of the thirty days, she offers an activity.
At first these activities include things like putting all reminders of "the dork" in a box and writing down all the things that were wrong with him, but eventually they move on to things like exercising, volunteering, even feng shui. Every day also has a song that's relevant to that day's activity and is, usually, pretty cool. (I made some additions to my iTunes after reading this book!)
The book is also sprinkled with pop culture references that teenagers can relate to and concludes with the lists, "Girls Who Have Dumped with Aplomb," "Girls Who Have Been More Famously Dumped Than You (And Lived to Tell!)," "Movies About Being Dumped," "More Break-Up Songs," and "Books About the Ups, Downs, and In-Betweens of Relationships."
I don't know how effective this book would be for getting over a serious relationship that lasted for years, but I think it provides a lot of guidance and sympathy for most teenage girls dealing with breakups. For everyone else it will, at the very least, provide a smile.
Reviewed by: Katie Hayes
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