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Dead Clowns (2007)

Lucien Eisenach , Kimberly Lynn Cole , Steve Sessions  |  R |  DVD
1.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)

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Product Details

  • Actors: Lucien Eisenach, Kimberly Lynn Cole, Debbie Rochon, Jeff Dylan Graham, Brinke Stevens
  • Directors: Steve Sessions
  • Format: AC-3, Closed-captioned, Color, Dolby, NTSC, Subtitled, Widescreen
  • Language: English
  • Subtitles: English, Spanish
  • Region: Region 1 (U.S. and Canada only. Read more about DVD formats.)
  • Number of discs: 1
  • Rated: R (Restricted)
  • Studio: Lions Gate
  • DVD Release Date: July 31, 2007
  • Run Time: 95 minutes
  • Average Customer Review: 1.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (19 customer reviews)
  • ASIN: B000QCQUN8
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #88,940 in Movies & TV (See Top 100 in Movies & TV)

Special Features

None.

Editorial Reviews

As a hurricane approaches the small coastal town of Port Emmett, an innocent group of residents are visited by an unspeakable horror. Fifty years ago a bridge collapsed in the small town, plunging a circus train into the dark water below. The clown car was never recovered. Tonight the zombie clowns emerge from the bay to exact revenge on the descendants of those who left them buried under the silt and mud for half a century.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars headache October 29, 2007
By ribcage
Format:DVD
DEAD CLOWNS is just a headache waiting to happen. The story is that all these clowns on a train fell into the bay during a hurricane, and the town just didn't care to spend the money to look for them or remember them so now another hurricane rolls around and the clowns are back after 50 years or so to seek revenge.

Only they're not very funny. Really, what's the point of putting clowns in your movie if it's going to be a COMPLETELY humorless film. I don't pick up a clown film because I think it will have a good story, I don't pick them up for the great character development, I pick them up to see clowns killing people in clown-like ways. And zombie clowns? Well, thats brillaint. Except they screwed it up by letting them just be zombies dressed as clowns. I was expecting imagination, I got nothing.

The characters are boring, cliche and annoying and the dialogue is dull and drawn out to death. The pacing is all wrong. The only relief comes in waiting for the occassional stock hurricane footage because at least that was filmed well. Only it's the same shots over and over so that gets pretty awful too.

But yeah all of that I could've ignored for the most part if these clowns had actually been clowns and killed with imagination. That would have left the problem of the film being unbearably slow, poorly and weirdly lit with bad sound, and generally headache-inducing, but at least I would've thrown down two stars for the interesting deaths.

As is, there's no reason to watch this, let alone buy it.
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16 of 19 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars OH BROTHER... August 6, 2007
Format:DVD
I have decided I am TRULY in the wrong profession. If the people involved with this major catastrophe can get money, we ALL need to go the route of the movie industry.

I will say one thing: the majority of "indy" horror productions sell their movie with packaging. I picked this up and thought, "hey; interesting cover. I'll give it a try." STUPID, STUPID, STUPID. This movie is the WORST movie I've ever seen--and I've seen plenty of stinkers in my 54 years.

Supposedly set in Port Emmett, Florida, "Dead Clowns" is about (I should have read the back of the disc) a terrible tragedy involving of all things a clown car being dumped into the bay--never to be recovered. It's said, mind you, that on certain nights you can hear the sound of a calliope wafting over the waters...

Obviously shot on a shoe-string budget (not to mention a wing and a prayer), there is actually no story at all. There's some boring footage of a hurricane, the same old shot of wind blown palm trees, traffic lights, and stop signs. Yep; that about sums up the movie. Oh...I forgot. Seems that--for whatever reason--the clowns are now zombies and they have picked this particular night (keep in mind they've been buried for over 50 years) to show up and eat people. The effects are at an all time low: think Herschel Gordon Lewis--but WAY worse. The extras in this movie (and I absolutely refuse to refer to any of them as actors) have as much stage presence as a dead ferret. The editing, pacing, and directing are all horrible. The majority of the cast members do not even speak--probably for good reason.

This complete waste of time lasts 95 minutes and was distributed by Lionsgate. People, keep this up and you'll be as defunct as Orion Pictures.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
By Paul
Format:DVD
This DVD is just plain awful. The setting is horrible. The storm scenes are terrible. The dialogue is non-existant and the actors deliver them with little emotion. The special effects are sooooooo bad. Anything on TV would have been time better spent.

I have seen much better productions from local community theatre groups. This one is definitely in my worst 3 horror movies of all time.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars Zombies + Clowns Should Equal Amazing! August 19, 2007
Format:DVD
How could someone have such a great idea and fail so miserably? Now I am not one who NEEDS a good plot to enjoy a horror movie or good acting for that matter. But there HAS to be something enjoyable about the movie, the only enjoyment I had while watching DEAD CLOWNS was making fun of every person involved in this movie. The FX were terrible, the clowns looked like any everyday schmuck wearing a Wal-Mart clown costume and a plastic "mummified face" mask, the acting (what little there was) was horrible, the plot (what little there was) was terribly written. Combine one good idea with a horrible follow through and you have yourself DEAD CLOWNS. I would not recommend this movie to anyone but if your curiosity gets the best of you, as it did me, rent this pathetic excuse for entertainment before buying it.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
2.0 out of 5 stars What category is below B-movies? December 8, 2007
Format:DVD
This was just not good. In the world of straight-to-DVD movies, this is one of the worst I've ever seen. There is minimal dialogue; which is probably a good thing because the actors didn't do too well with the simple lines that they had. The costumes might have been good, but the lighting was so terrible that you couldn't see what was going on most of the time. The lack of a plot was the film's biggest problem. It's just clowns killing people.

Unfortunately, there isn't even a cheese factor to give this movie some redeeming quality. I was hoping for something overly done like Killer Klowns from Outer Space. But there is nothing in this movie. This will never be a cult classic, or even a cheap thrill. At least the producers only had to make about 50 bucks to break even on the film.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
2.0 out of 5 stars "I've heard of clowning around when a hurricane hits, but this is...
Port Emmett is a nice place to visit, but you wouldn't want to live there. Heck, you wouldn't want to be anywhere near the place when a hurricane hits. Read more
Published on November 8, 2010 by Dr. Nocturna
5.0 out of 5 stars Just as advertised
Product was brand new in original wrapper as advertised was delivered earlier than expected date! Awesome
Published on November 7, 2010 by Corliss Jones
3.0 out of 5 stars Dead Clowns Can't Do Frowns
Dead Clowns is a low budget movie-period. That is the bottom line. That's it. It's a piece that would rank upwards with John Carpenter's "The Fog" or de Ossorio's "Tombs of the... Read more
Published on March 15, 2010 by R. R. Gutierrez
1.0 out of 5 stars What a sh**y circus
With review number Dan Q on the Octoberfest horror season we decided to go with a little of the clown horror variety. Read more
Published on October 13, 2009 by Sid the Elf
1.0 out of 5 stars anything is better to waste your money on then this.
no actors, directors, screen writters, make-up artests, or professionals were used in the making of this crap. none were asked for advice either. Read more
Published on June 28, 2009 by gespect
1.0 out of 5 stars So so so misleading
Im really not into giving movies bad reviews, for everybody has their own vantage point. Although i will say dead clowns is very misleading. Dont get me wrong, i love indy films. Read more
Published on October 19, 2008 by John Parrish
4.0 out of 5 stars I Can't Wait to Be Burned At the Stake for Liking This Movie!!?
I had to save this movie from its scathing reviews...I honestly like it. Now keep in mind that the director was interviewed and kept referring to it as not a low-budget movie, but... Read more
Published on September 13, 2008 by Noir Man
1.0 out of 5 stars Why?
OK I'm not quite understanding why anybody would ever give this flop of a movie 5 stars. Cult classic my @$$. Never in a million years would that ever happen. Read more
Published on January 4, 2008 by Leo
1.0 out of 5 stars WHAT THE ....????
honestly i'm at a loss for words for this movie. i really don't know what to say. dead clowns, dead movie, dead it should stay. man, i can't believe it. Read more
Published on December 17, 2007 by horrorqueen
1.0 out of 5 stars Ugh!
I have seen this movie. Only the existence of`"Manos, the Hands of Fate" keeps this from being the worst movie ever made.
Published on October 2, 2007 by Dorothy Carter
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