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Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out The Best in People at Their Worst Audio CD – Audiobook, CD, Unabridged


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Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out The Best in People at Their Worst + Dealing with People You Can’t Stand, Revised and Expanded Third Edition: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst
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Product Details

  • Audio CD
  • Publisher: Macmillan Audio; Unabridged edition (January 4, 2011)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1427211744
  • ISBN-13: 978-1427211743
  • Product Dimensions: 5.3 x 0.8 x 5.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 4.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #403,940 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

From Library Journal

Whether at work or at home, we all have to deal with people we can't stand to be around. Our challenge is to develop creative ways to handle these difficult people. Brinkman and Kirschner, both doctors of naturopathic medicine and professional speakers, have just made our job easier with this lively guidebook, in which they identify and explore the psychological roots of ten specific behavior patterns that represent normal people at their worst. Realizing that changing oneself is more realistic than changing the behavior of others, the authors provide a variety of communicative skills that we can cultivate in ourselves to turn conflict into cooperation. Finally, Brinkman and Kirschner (How To Handle Difficult People with Tact and Skill, McGraw, 1994) illustrate how to use these skills with each of the ten problem behaviors. While all problem behaviors might not fit nicely into one of their ten categories, the authors do provide a dynamic assortment of interpersonal communication tools for managing most difficult people. Highly recommended for all libraries.
David R. Johnson, Louisiana State Univ. Lib., Eunice
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

Review

“…both [author/narrators] are comfortably engaged with their ideas and are easy to hear overall. They make this state-of-the-art guide sound both important and down-to-earth…This is social science writing at its best – analytical thinking applied to frustrating interpersonal situations to help people become more proactive and constructive in their lives.” – AudioFile Magazine


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Customer Reviews

This book is funny and has cartoons.
A Customer
This book has an excellent premise: the only way to deal with difficult people is to change the way you respond to them.
Anne
I found it to be an excellent resource and I would recommend this book to anyone.
Crystal

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

150 of 154 people found the following review helpful By Mark A. Horstman on November 19, 2002
Format: Paperback
If you're a manager and have to deal with the day to day complaints and conflicts of a workplace, this is the best book I've read about it, without question.
I'm a leadership consultant and my firm spends a lot of time mediating conflicts and facilitating meetings where I have to get people on the same page. I have formal training in negotation, and mediation, and all that other more formal stuff. And a lot of it works. But the question I get asked over and over again is "what do I do when the conflict doesn't justify outside assistance? What about the DAY TO DAY conflicts - one of my people refuses to bend her schedule, another won't come in on time, another won't try to work with a sister department, my boss won't give me the resources I need." Well, this is that book. It lays out a simple concept of conflict (other people see things differently from you and therefore act differently), and then does something that SO FEW of the other books do: it tells you exactly what to say and how to say it. I have had my fill of books which tell me to "be nice" or "work towards a compromise". My response is, I know that, but how do I DO that? How do I keep the other person from popping off at me? THIS BOOK does that. It's simple - exactly right for line managers with DAY to DAY conflicts.
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94 of 96 people found the following review helpful By Eric Leberg on March 8, 2000
Format: Paperback
I'm a felony probation officer. I deal with difficult people. I applied the clear techniques provided with an offender described for years as "a real nasty guy...." by previous probation officers. The technique worked immediately, the man expressed appreciation saying "You are the first person in your department who ever understood me...I'll do exactly what you told me to do." I could relate scores of other times these techniques have helped over the years. Rick & Rick's set of tapes is also extremely helpful. You won't be sorry you learned this stuff.
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119 of 125 people found the following review helpful By DocRossow on May 13, 2001
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This is the finest book I've read on handling difficult people. As a training director for a large company, I've read many books on this subject, and trained interpersonal skills for years. This book is the CLEAREST, most practical book on the subject.
The ten types of difficult people are now in my vocabulary, and help me instantly size up a situation so I can handle it better. The authors detail practical steps to take with each style, making it easier to increase your confidence in difficult situations.
Most of all the authors encourage the reader to change his or her behavior, and the last chapter even offers the idea of the reader being a difficult person, in order to further reinforce the skills that this book teaches.
A real winner, and a book that has helped my career and my sanity.
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48 of 48 people found the following review helpful By JimG on August 9, 2000
Format: Paperback
While I judge the title to be a bit dramatic the information in this book has had a profound, dramatic effect on my life. I have approached the subject matter from the perspective that I'm in control of my relationships, and I can choose my own reactions to someone else's behavior. My own pettiness, as well other poeple's, was dictating some of my behavior, my attitudes, and some decisions too (sometimes badly). Yes, I see myself in some of those 10 personality traits described in the book. I wanted to be free of that nonsense, as well learn ways to have a good relationship with most anyone. This book's value to me has been to help me rise above the daily situations I encounter by helping me see human personality in a structured way. So that I can deliberately behave, react, and interact with people in positive, productive ways. I've been able to find peace with personalities that I've despised. I've found helpful information on how to get along with people who I hadn't a clue otherwise. If you're curious about finding solutions to working with, living with or next door to, or just finding peaceful ways to be around difficult people I recommend this book. I thought so much of this book I sent a copy of this book to a peer. This isn't about short term solutions to heated situations (customer service). This is about building trust and solid foundations with people with whom you have a longer term relationship (longer than 3 to 10 minutes) of some nature. Best wishes.
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34 of 35 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on October 17, 2001
Format: Paperback
I was giving a workshop for people who were starting or re-entering the workforce for a graduate program in mental health. I did extensive research in our extensive school library, including books and periodicals. This was, by far, the most useful source of information that I found. It would be useful for anyone from an entry level worker to a top executive. It identifies the 10 "most difficult" types of people, and gives clear, step-by-step strategies for dealing with them. It also gives general advice for better communications. The advice is profound, yet written so anyone can understand, with narrative examples of the difficult behaviors.
My workshop was very successful, and I highly recommend this book.
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36 of 38 people found the following review helpful By Anne on May 1, 2003
Format: Paperback
This book has an excellent premise: the only way to deal with difficult people is to change the way you respond to them. Think about it. Do any of us ever do what we want to do all the time? Of course not. How many New Year's resolutions have we broken? Well, if we can't control our own behavior for our own good, how can we control someone else's especially when that person's obnoxious ways satisfies some perverse need? Some books on interpersonal conflict recommend that the reader resort to planning biting comebacks or simply ignoring the offending party. Rick and Rick offer more positive and healthier solutions (such as being more empathetic without being a punching bag) that if implemented will help the reader stay sane when under attack and eventually learn to stay above the fray.
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