Customer Reviews

Dean and Me: (A Love Story)

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Growing up working for an executive at NBC, I was lucky to have known Dean Martin myself. Now, years later, as founder of the "Dean Martin Fan Center", I have met and heard from so many people who were close enough to know both Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis when they were a comedy/musical team who took the world by storm.

After entertaining the world for ten years through stage, radio, films, television and recordings, the public grew to love the team. Then, after a decade of burning up everything they touched, the duo became burned out themselves. Having to please the studio executives who wanted to keep the cash cow producing, their material became recycled. Martin and Lewis as individuals grew and saw beyond what they were doing. Those pressures and confining elements only led to animosity between each other, and finally wound up in divorce. As in any parting, not only did it hurt the two involved, but also their family and friends. The public was their 'extended' family-- and now each fan had to choose between taking Dean's side or Jerry's side, usually putting blame on the other partner for the breakup. The media took huge advantage of this.

When I first heard that Jerry was a writing his memoirs of those partnership years, I was more than a bit apprehensive. After all, Dean has already left this world and what would Jerry say about him? Would Jerry take credit for everything? Would Jerry somehow put blame for their breakup on his partner somehow? I finally got my advance copy sent overnight from the publisher. Amazingly, it wasn't the size of the Gutenberg Bible that I expected. I finished it in one sitting, actually waiting for something I didn't like or would find inacurate to blast on about. Guess what? I WAS SHOCKED -- Shocked to find that this book is honest, sincere, unbiased and does not put either Dean or Jerry into the spotlight -- rather it lights up the stage. It is a well written, well balanced, easy to read history, focusing on the duo as a "team". Their excitement... their worries... their amazement... their ups and their downs... their freedoms and their obstacles. Jerry ties together anecdotes and facts many of us heard before, with more focus and information, to have it all finally make sense. I don't impress easily when it comes to stories told (no matter who writes them), but as for "Dean and Me : A Love Story," this is the real deal. Finally -- an honest inside look at the exhilaration and ever mounting pressures Martin & Lewis experienced, always having to please everyone around them, except themselves.

James Kaplan, Jerry's co-writer, is absolutely marvelous in helping Lewis, not only get his message across, but making the reader feel the emotions inside along the way. He paints a picture with words. I would advise anyone wanting a first-hand look at Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis, that this is the book to read.

- Neil T Daniels (...)

I was a bit skeptical when I saw this book, wondering if Mr. Lewis could put aside his ego long enough to give Dean his due. Perhaps time and age have softened his perspective beause this is an amazingly fine book and Lewis seems to speak honestly about the ups and downs in his relationship with Dean Martin, as well as his own shortcomings. There is a bittersweet quality to his reminiscences as well as a wistful, yearning tone. I got the sense that if he could do it over, he'd have reconnected with Dean more often before Martin died. Now it is too late for that and Lewis's sadness is palpable.

The book should satisfy fans of the two, as it covers everything from their very first days working together to the rockier moments when the magic no longer held and they went their separate ways. I've read numerous interviews of both Dean and Jerry but this is the most honest and open account thus far.

Admittedly, it IS a one-sided perspective, as Dean is no longer around to add his opinion. But Lewis is quite open, not glossing over the pros and cons of show business, about the overnight change from being relative unknowns to a heady life of parties, celebrity and the perks that came with that fame- adoring fans, plenty of women and their "bad boy" image that occasionally surfaced, since they could call the shots and set their own terms. It didn't always bring out the best in them.

Also, as successful as they were, both partners were constrained by their roles - Lewis as the perennial clown and Martin as the singer who served as the straight man alongside Lewis. While each one highlighted the others' talents, neither one got the opportunity to fully express their other talents...at least, not until they parted.

In the years to come, both Lewis and Martin would reveal that they could stand on their own as actors and Lewis seems to have come into his own particularly late in life, appearing in cameos and lead roles in some excellent movies.

It is unfortunate that they could't succeed in their separate careers while maintaining a close friendship. But they could not...at least, not until Martin appeared on one of the annual telethons hosted by Lewis. It was a bit awkward but the affection between the two was clear.

This book fills in the blanks and details up until that moment - and even beyond.

I am not a professional reviewer, but on this book, DEAN AND ME (A Love Story), I am compelled to speak up!

Having loved the comedy of Martin and Lewis all my life, I bought this book the very day it was released and enjoyed reading it so much that I am already reading it for the second time. (This is NOT like me!) Oh, it is not great literature, to be sure, but, my oh my, it is a wonderful story! And it really is a love story... It is a story of two regular guys who achieved the great American dream. It is, in fact, American History. It is also the story of a deep and abiding friendship and the realization that the friendship was a treasure far greater than the achievement of the childhood dreams of fame and fortune.

That is not all. It is also quite an entertaining read. Jerry Lewis, with James Kaplan's expert assistance, has written it as though he is sitting in your living room telling the story; he includes little sidebars and interesting tidbits about the times, the fashions, the mob, the rat pack, and many other celebrities. One of the most wonderful surprises of this book is that Mr. Lewis does not beat his readers over the head with the silliness we might have expected from him. He has, instead, written this story to honor his partner and the partnership and friendship they shared. He engages his readers from the first page and escorts them on a sentimental journey - from Martin and Lewis' humble beginnings and how they got their start in the big time to their infamous break up and some of what came thereafter, up to and including Dean Martin's broken heart (over the loss of his son, Dino, Jr. in a plane crash) which ultimately led to Dean's own death. Mr. Lewis includes parts of the story of their reconciliation and of their last encounter, only a short time before Dean passed away.

While he is clearly not telling this as a comedy, Jerry Lewis is, after all, the consummate classic entertainer, always conscious of what this audience is feeling. This shines through in his generous peppering of the book with stories of their early years and their mischievous antics, and the predicaments into which those antics led them on more than one occasion. He recounts it all in such a way that it consistently evoked remarkably vivid memories of their hilarious routines that had me laughing out loud throughout the entire read!

I cannot remember when I have had so much fun reading and then re-reading a memoir, a tribute!

I never say this type of thing, but... if you have ever been a fan of this greatest of the great comedy team, do yourself a favor and purchase this book! In my opinion, you will not be spending your hard earned money; you will be investing it. It is my belief that among the benefits and returns with which you will be delighted are: the wonderful memories, the discussions, the laughs, the conversations, and the out-and-out fun it will inspire within your heart, your home, and your social circle! You may even find yourself looking up an old friend...

Thank you for the laughter, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis. You have done it again... still!

There was something about Martin & Lewis that America just loved. The two created a symphony of slapstick that left audiences helpless with laughter - but no matter how mad the hijinks, there was an undercurrent of mutual affection that won for them a fulsome adoration other teams (The Three Stooges, The Marx Brothers, Abbott & Costello) would never know. At their height, they were the highest paid, most successful act in show business. The Smoothie from Steubenville and the Nebbish from Newark transcended any demographic you'd care to name. Together they made a whole so much greater than the sum of its parts that it could never be adequately imitated (Duke Mitchell and Sammy Petrillo) or replaced (Steve Rossi and Marty Allen).

The nation loved Dean and Jerry so much that, even though they worked apart for 35 years, neither would ever be permitted to forget the other. During their first twenty years of solo performances, when their mutual animosity was at full strength, nothing brought a crowd to life faster than when one would mention his ex-partner.

In Vegas, Dean would periodically turn on Ken Lane, his pianist (who would harp on his boss for not singing straight) with a warning: "You keep adding to your part every night... remember what happened to Jerry!" Laughs and applause. On an early `70's MDA telethon, Jerry looked at the rising tote board and spontaneously launched into an acapella rendition of "Everybody Loves Somebody" - and once the crowd finished gasping, pulled himself up short: "Holy cow, will you listen to whose song I'm singing? I must be out of my mind!" Laughs and applause.

What made their 1976 reunion during Jerry's Labor Day telethon such a landmark is that audiences had been rooting for it for so long. (Only the year before, Esquire magazine unsuccessfully tried to solicit both for a Christmas cover photo; the idea being to depict the two with a headline of "Peace on Earth, Goodwill to Men.") No sooner had Dean emerged from behind a curtain than the crowd shrieked with delight and rose to their feet. The moment was replayed several times during the telethon, and even made the evening news. It was almost as if America needed these two to kiss and make up.

And now, a decade after Martin's passing, Lewis and his co-author, James Kaplan, have brought forth an honest, if incomplete, account of the team's career. The story of how they met, forged an act, climbed the proverbial ladder of success, found their egos growing and their ambitions diverging, and split apart while "causing each other a world of hurt" (Lewis's accurate summation) is spelled out in this succinct, easy to read tome.

Unfotunately, one comes away with the impression that there's more to the story... and one would be correct. The team's television appearances on "The Colgate Comedy Hour" are barely discussed, and all that's mentioned about their radio career is that they had one. Lewis asserts that he and Martin thrived without writers; Norman Lear, Ed Simmons, Danny Arnold, Arthur Phillips, Rocky Kalish and Harry Crane, among others, would certainly beg to differ. Lewis freely blames producer Hal Wallis for enforcing the non-comedic heel Martin portrayed in the team's films (as well as the sameness of the plots), but fails to explain why Dean didn't fare much better in the movies made by their own company, York Productions.

Still, there are a few genuine surprises, even for Martin & Lewis aficionados. Jerry convincingly pinpoints the period when Dean's anger about their situation began to flare, and the regret expressed at his complete inadequacy to solve the problem is palpable. We get snippets of private conversations that are far more insightful than one would expect based on the pair's on-screen antics, and they jell perfectly with events described in contemporary news and magazine articles and/or latter-day biographies of the two men. Unlike the highly colored volumes penned by Arthur Marx, Nick Tosches and others, "Dean and Me" takes the high road in depicting both men and their respective lifestyles (although Lewis doesn't gloss over the extra-marital activities, he doesn't apologize for them either).

What made Martin & Lewis so dazzling, so captivating, is that each made the other look positively brilliant. To discover their TV and radio shows from the early fifties is to behold two guys in love with each other and their work, and having the time of their lives. The America that took them to its heart doesn't exist anymore, but "Dean and Me" very nearly brings it - and the phenomenon that was Martin & Lewis - back to life.

I was surprised by how poignant I found Jerry Lewis' memoir, "Dean and Me: A Love Story."

The Jerry Lewis of this book is not the Jerry Lewis whose movies I never watch.

The Jerry Lewis of "Dean and Me" is a lover. The person he loves is the man he was last professionally partnered with half a century ago, the late Dean Martin.

That portrayal, the portrayal of love one heterosexual man feels for another, is what makes this book worth reading. The book communicates that certainly Martin, and occasionally Lewis, used good looks and / or show business success to pick up one woman after another, and to go through several marriages between them. Through it all, though, one gets the sense that the really interesting relationship was between the two men.

"Dean and Me" is brief and spare; it betrays no literary ambitions. It reads like a magazine article, quickly and easily. There are no detailed descriptions of the central story's two main backdrops: life in 1950s America, or the Hollywood studio system. If you know something about those, you will apply what you know to what you read. If you don't, this book won't enrich your knowledge by very much.

Even events central to the plot are often left undescribed. Jerry Lewis admits that he was a "bully" on a given movie set, and that the director threw him off. The reader wants details: what exactly did Lewis do? The book never tells.

What the book does right is tell the story of Lewis' love for Martin, and it hints at reciprocal love that Martin felt for Lewis, but was less eager to express openly.

Here's a lovely description from page 12, when Lewis and Martin first meet:

"He [Martin] gave me that smile again, warm but ever so slightly cool around the edges. It bathed you in its glow, yet didn't let you in. Men don't like to admit it, but there's something about a truly handsome guy who also happens to be truly masculine - what they call a man's man - that's as magnetic to us as it is to women. 'That's what I want to be,' you think. 'Maybe if I hang around with him, some of that'll rub off on me.'"

Lewis talks of being fascinated by Martin's smell. "The minute I first sniffed [Martin's cologne] I associated it with the almost incredible voodoo my partner exerted on the opposite sex. I wanted some of that, too! I began paying close attention to Dean's post shower ritual: He would take his bottle of [cologne], pour some into one cupped palm, then put the bottle down and slap his palms together. Then he'd rub the cologne all over his body . . . " (page 128).

When Lewis attempted to imitate this ritual, he rubbed Martin's cologne on an especially sensitive area, and ran screaming down a hotel hallway without his clothes . . .

Throughout the book, as if he were a girlfriend or a wife, Lewis frets about film critics' emphasis on his own gifts and their stinting of any praise for Dean Martin. Lewis fears that his own prominence will come to injure his relationship with Martin.

Martin and Lewis break up their act, and it isn't until much later, when Frank Sinatra orchestrates a reunion, that they are able to bury the ax. But, still, Lewis is very careful never to crowd Martin, never so much as letting Martin know, for example, that he, Lewis, attended the funeral of Martin's beloved son.

The conversations between Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis always began the same:

"Hey Paul, how you doin'"
"How you doin', polly?"
You still don't remember my f****** name?"

The simple fact that these two men started their conversations with silly nicknames says it all about their love for each other.

On Tuesday, July 25, 1956, ten years to the day after their first appearance together at Skinny D'Amato's club in Atlantic City, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis played their last show together at the Copacabana in New York City. This day forever resounded in the mind of Jerry Lewis, who, along with James Kaplan wrote this book. This is a well written and entertaining read. No excuses are given by Jerry Lewis for the break-up or the mistakes that ensured that these two men would not be able to play together for long term. It is an honest portrayal of two men who, well, really loved each other. Remember the song, "When the moon hits your eye like a bigga' pizza pie, that's Amore?" Essentially, that is what these two men, who worked professionally for ten years, learned and loved about each other. There was the monkey, Jerry Lewis and the suave, romantic, handsome singer, Dean Martin. How these two men, who really had nothing in common came together and made the best comedy team of the century is a story in itself.

Jerry Lewis was a comic, and he met Dean Martin, a crooner on a street curb in New York City. Their managers knew each other and they were introduced. At the time they were playing at the same small club. Jerry Lewis played a trick on Dean as he started his singing act, and Dean gave him that slow take and was grinning, and that was the beginning of the team. They made it big, they made lots of money, and they spent a lot of it. They both had women, Dean many, and Jerry , his wife, Patti. Life was great, but then as time moved along, things began to falter. Professional jealousy from both of them, and like a marriage, it all came apart. Their mutual split, on that fateful night in 1956, led them their separate ways. Both of them successful in their private careers, but their relationship was gone. Jerry had problems with drugs and his marriage that he tried to overcome. It was not until 1976, while Jerry Lewis was hosting the Muscular Dystrophy Telethon that Frank Sinatra brought them back together. This made big news, I remember watching the telethon that night and seeing for myself the surprise and pleasure on each of their faces. However, their relationship didn't patch itself. They would meet every so often in a restaurant. Jerry would call Dean frequently and then intermittently. Jerry realized that Dean really wanted to remain alone. And, then, Dean died, and Jerry attended the funeral, and he spoke:

"You are so lucky that you knew my partner and my friend. I will not fall into that drone of pain about death, but I will ask you to all just yell `Yeah" that he lived...that he was with us for all that time. `Yeah!' `Yeah!' And that , my friends, is my celebration of his life. Long may he drink!"

A heartfelt book, from a man who loved his friend. I don't think Jerry Lewis ever got over the break-up with his friend, Dean Martin. A loving tribute. Recommended. prisrob

DEAN & ME (A LOVE STORY) is a no-holds-barred, painfully honest look at one of the most successful partnerships in the history of show business: Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis. Dean Martin was a street-wise young Italian from milltown Steubenville, Ohio. Jerry Lewis was a gangly teenager from Newark, New Jersey when they met. Both were struggling to make themselves known; Jerry as a lip-synching comic and Dean as a singer. Who knew then that their unlikely pairing in July 1946 would take the entertainment world by storm?

Dean and Jerry played off each other. Dean was the straight man for Jerry's brash and goofy antics. The two men rarely rehearsed --- they simply didn't need to. They had a sense of timing and a chemistry that their audiences saw and loved. In no time at all they went from playing to a handful of people in rather nondescript clubs in Atlantic City to the big time. Jerry always opened the act and warmed up the crowd with his jokes. Then Dean came onstage and sang a few songs. The rest of their act usually consisted of hijinks, singing, dancing and mayhem.

Soon they were playing to packed audiences in famous nightclubs. If anything, their rise to fame was meteoric. Dean and Jerry made a series of comedic films and did radio and television spots. Their favorite venue was always nightclubs. People loved their fresh, somewhat wacky humor interspersed with a few romantic ballads sung by Dean.

Along with fame came money. Lots of money. More money than they knew what to do with at first, though they quickly learned to enjoy the good life. Jerry handled the business end of things, and Dean was happy with that arrangement; it left him time to play golf. Their celebrity status opened many doors for them and gave them connections to such luminaries as Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby. Because of their work in nightclubs, they also became acquainted with a few Mob members. Dean loved to gamble and occasionally Jerry had to extricate his partner from rather sticky situations.

Fame and fortune often have a downside, and Dean and Jerry had their share of difficulties. Dean's marriage ended in divorce. Jerry always got much better press than Dean did. The press credited Jerry as the brains behind the act, and Dean was considered "the pretty boy and lightweight." Both men had big egos. Dean became jealous of Jerry and tension built up between the two. Jerry thought of Dean as his big brother and was crushed when Dean became distant with him. Before long the press got wind of the partners' tension, which grew daily.

Eventually Jerry insisted upon dissolving the partnership, no easy task since the men had legal contracts and years' worth of obligations. Many folks besides Dean and Jerry had a huge financial stake in the partnership, and ending it was very difficult. The last Martin and Lewis performance was on July 24, 1956 at the Copacabana. They had come a long way from their first appearance in Atlantic City exactly ten years previously to the day.

Both men forged successful careers on their own. Dean had several hit songs and appeared in movies and on television. Along with Frank Sinatra, Sammy Davis Jr. and others, he performed regularly in a group called the Rat Pack. Jerry became a very popular director-comedian, especially in Europe. He created and starred in several comedies, and was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize for his tireless fundraising work for neuromuscular diseases.

Jerry's book details all the years that he and Dean knew each other --- not just their ten-year partnership. There was a twenty-year period when the men did not speak, and there times when they acknowledged each other's presence. Jerry writes about their eventual reconciliation. There probably never was in the history of show business a partnership as unique as that of Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis.

--- Reviewed by Carole Turner

Anyone who has followed Jerry's post-Dean Martin career knows that he has ALWAYS waxed sentimental about their tenure as the world's most popular comics.He has always credited Martin for his (Lewis')show-biz breakthrough,always played up Dean's lack of recognition as "the greatest straight-man that ever lived" and has always blamed himself for provoking the split.I agree that Dean would probably never have chimed in with the same level of sentimentality,imagining a mid-90's talk show appearance together,but Jerry has always been the tear-jerker with his loving tales of the Dino years--and it continues to shine through in this brief but touching example of Jerry's humble, humanitarian side.

I was born in 1962 and didn't even know that Dean and Jerry had been partners until I was nine. And then I devored every movie and clip I could find of the both of them.

I saw them reunite on the MD telathon, and wept with joy to see the two of them together.

This is a wonderful love letter of a younger brother to a older brother. I also felt the loss that the two of them felt losing each other.

A lovely book of freindship. A good read.

It took Jerry Lewis nearly a decade since former partner Dean Martin's death to write "Dean and Me: A Love Story." It was worth the wait.

Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin were a phenomenom together who both went on to huge success on their own. This book is the story of their successful partnership, their brotherhood, their bitter break-up and their lasting love for each other.

What is striking about this book is Lewis' fervent praise for Martin as a straight man, comedian, singer and actor. The reader is often left with the impression that Martin was the real star of this duo. Lewis' ardent fervor for Martin shows the true love of this story.

The reader will also be impressed with truth and honesty that details the ups and downs, the infedelities and the insecurities.

Lewis paints a portrait of Dean Martin that no biography has dared to paint. The book shows a man of great talent and kindness who had millions of adoring fans and a loving family, but who ultimately wanted to be left alone.

This wonderful book can be summed up in the title of one of Martin's biggest hit songs, "Memories Are Made Of This."