Dear Catastrophe Waitress: A Novel [Paperback]

Brendan Halpin (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 13, 2007

Mark thinks he has found The One in college. When Raquel abruptly takes off for Los Angeles to become a rock star, Mark tries to be happy for her–until ROCK-L’s first single sweeps the airwaves–a song about Mark’s stamina entitled “Two Minute Man.” And Mark’s life is never the same again.

Philippa doesn’t really think twice about cheating on her punk rocker boyfriend, Trevor. After all, she’s going to break up with him anyway. He mooches off her, treats her badly, and writes stupid songs about her breasts. Then Trevor’s band makes a splash with its one and only song sensation, “Philippa Cheats.” And suddenly Philippa is the most infamous ex-girlfriend in all of London.

Thus Philippa and Mark find themselves adrift, both single and living in Boston, still reeling from the impact that three minutes of music had on their lives. When these two minor-key souls meet and form a major chord, they will have to overcome the sneaking suspicion that each will betray the other . . . possibly with a song.

“Brendan Halpin adds weight to his funny moments and lightness to his sad ones . . . [reminding] us that comedy and tragedy aren’t opposites at all.”
–Carolyn Parkhurst, author of The Dogs of Babel, on Donorboy

“The author’s greatest gift: his pitch-perfect ear for dialogue.”
–People, on Long Way Back

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Vindictive songs change the course of two people's lives in Halpin's third novel (after Long Way Back), a funny and unlikely story about mending broken hearts. Philippa Strange, a fresh-out-of-high-school punk rock girl, divides her time between an alcoholic mother in Cincinnati and a rocker boyfriend in London and becomes unfortunately notorious after her boyfriend immortalizes her cheating ways—and her name—in a popular song. Meanwhile, shortly after Mark Norris finishes college in Philadelphia, he finds himself the victim of "premature ejaculation libel" when his ex-girlfriend cracks the Top 40 with her hit song, "Two Minute Man." Mark stumbles his way though toxic relationships as a pregnant Philippa, back in the States for good, fakes her death and assumes a new identity to escape from a violent boyfriend. Oddly, Mark's bumbling early adulthood is more engaging to read about than Philippa's flight, and though it's a given that the two will end up together, Halpin's assured prose and knack for mischievously comic turns ensure a smooth ride into happily ever after. (Mar. 13)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

From Booklist

In alternating chapters, Halpin (Long Way Back, 2006) details dual stories covering 20 years in the lives of punk-rock-loving Philippa and sensitive Mark. When Philippa's London musician boyfriend catches her cheating, he immortalizes the incident in a wildly popular song that sends her scurrying back to Cincinnati. Meanwhile, Mark meets brooding bisexual Raquel, who takes off for L.A. after college and humiliates him with her chart-topping "Two-Minute Man." Things continue to spiral downward for both as Philippa becomes pregnant by an abusive lover and completely cuts off contact with her family and friends, changing her identity and moving to Boston, while Mark, who has become an elementary-school teacher, is dumped by his corporate lawyer fiancee. Halpin's story sometimes feels too superficial because of the time compression. But when he is at his best--his tenderhearted depictions of Mark's loneliness and inept romantic relationships and of the fraught but loving bond between Philippa and her strong-willed daughter--he proves himself to be an insightful observer of contemporary relationships. A funny and touching, if somewhat predictable, tribute to the brokenhearted. Joanne Wilkinson
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 308 pages
• Publisher: Villard (March 13, 2007)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0812977025
• ISBN-13: 978-0812977028
• Product Dimensions: 5.3 x 0.7 x 8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #2,412,846 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

I'm a writer and a teacher. I've written memoirs, novels for adults, and novels for young adults. I don't know if my interest in and talent at writing YA comes from my experience as a high school teacher or my immaturity. Either way, it's good.

I live in Boston with my wife Suzanne and our three children and our dog, Cooper.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4.0 out of 5 stars Funny, Engaging, May 28, 2008

By 

Ava DeMarco (Seattle, WA) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Dear Catastrophe Waitress: A Novel (Paperback)

I am not usually drawn to male authors, but the idea seemed interesting when reading the back cover. I loved this book. I loved Mark. he's the kind of guy that a girl would love to end up with and i loved Stacey. Phillipa was a complete mess, but Stacey was beautiful. I loved how her relationship with her daughter was not perfect, how she doubted herself, how he doubted himself, never seeing the greatness that they each possessed. It was a little predictable in some ways, but it's what readers want. It's what makes a happy ending. I highly recommend this book. If you like Nick Hornby, you'd like this, except i actually identify with this book more b/c the author seemed more intuned with a woman's mind.

4.0 out of 5 stars Absorbing and touching pop-infused love story, April 23, 2007

By 

John Hunt (Albany, CA United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Dear Catastrophe Waitress: A Novel (Paperback)

The Belle and Sebastian song of the same name seems to have provided the basic structure of this story of the convergence and romance of two damaged but likeable protagonists. The characters' extensive backstories are to some extent schematic (certain patterns from the past reassert themselves rather too obviously in the present), but the novel is enjoyable and absorbing, pop-literate without being obnoxious, and funny enough, with a voice that is always decent and humane.

5.0 out of 5 stars Life is Hard - but keep it up, it might get better, March 20, 2007

By 

Avid Reader (Cincinnati, OH United States) - See all my reviews

Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: Dear Catastrophe Waitress: A Novel (Paperback)

My only complaint is that I wish the book were longer. I read it in two nights and didn't want it to be over. Halpin's characters are likeable and understandable. The book is incredibly readable. And he conveys the message that despite how hard life is, if you keep going day by day, trying to do better -- you just might!