Dear Mom: Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You to Know But Will Never Tell You [Paperback]

Melody Carlson (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: March 17, 2009

Hear your daughter’s heart…
without the angst, arguments, or arm-wrestling

Raising a teen daughter can be like trying to chart a course underwater. You can drown in an ocean of one-word answers, defensive conversations, and unpredictable outbursts, and never get anywhere. Popular teen girls’ novelist Melody Carlson helps you cut through murky, deep, uncharted and seemingly unsafe waters so you can hear what your daughter’s really trying to tell you through her anger, silence, and mixed messages:

“I need you, but I won’t admit it.”
“I’m not as confident as I appear.”
“I have friends. I need a mother.”

Instead of focusing on outward behaviors, Dear Mom captures your daughter’s heart and soul. You can know your daughter’s hopes and fears, doubts and dreams about her identity, guys, friendships, and even you. And you can connect on a deeper, more intimate level that will carry both you and your daughter through the stormy seas of life.

Editorial Reviews

Review

“What a valuable treasure chest of insights into the mind of a teenage girl! This carefully crafted book is a must-read for any mom who desires to see her relationship with her teenage daughter move past the volley of words that pass between them and move into a new season where they can be joined at the heart. Thank you, Melody, for this superb handbook that gives us a glimpse into the teenage mind and equips us with understanding.”
–Robin Jones Gunn, best-selling author of the Christy Miller series and the Sisterchicks novels

“You think this is a book? It’s really a bridge–no, a cord!–that will connect moms and daughters in a way to get through those turbulent teen years. Read it and reap!”
–Dr. Kevin Leman, best-selling author of Have a New Kid by Friday and Running the Rapids

“When it comes to mom-daughter relationships, Melody Carlson gets it. In fact, I think Melody must have had our house bugged. She understands and she cares. Dear Mom is honest, authentic, practical, and hopeful.”
–Jim Burns, PhD, author of Confident Parenting, Teaching Your Children Healthy Sexuality, and Creating an Intimate Marriage

“Ever want to be let in on the running commentary going on inside your daughter’s head? Now you can. With wit and honesty, Melody Carlson explains what every mom needs to know.”
–Rebecca St. James, author, singer, and actress

About the Author

Melody Carlson is the award-winning author of more than one hundred books for adults, children, and teens, with sales totaling more than three million copies. Beloved for her Diary of a Teenage Girl and Notes from a Spinning Planet series, she’s also the author of the women’s novels Finding Alice (in production now for a Lifetime-TV movie), Crystal Lies, On This Day, These Boots Weren’t Made for Walking, and A Mile in My Flip-Flops. A mother of two grown sons, Melody lives in central Oregon with her husband and chocolate lab retriever. She’s a full-time writer and an avid gardener, biker, skier, and hiker.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 224 pages
• Publisher: WaterBrook Press (March 17, 2009)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1400074916
• ISBN-13: 978-1400074914
• Product Dimensions: 7.9 x 5.1 x 0.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #346,081 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Melody Carlson has written around 200 books for teens, women and children. That's a lot of books, but mostly she considers herself a "storyteller." Her books range from serious issues like schizophrenia (Finding Alice) to lighter topics like house-flipping (A Mile in My Flip-Flops) but most of the inspiration behind her fiction comes right out of real life. Her young adult novels (Diary of a Teenage Girl, TrueColors etc.) appeal to teenage girls around the world. Her annual Christmas novellas become more popular each year. She's won a number of awards (including the Rita and Gold Medallion) and some of her books have been optioned for film/TV. Carlson has two grown sons and makes her home in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and yellow Lab dog. To find out more about Melody Carlson, visit her website at http://www.melodycarlson.com/

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Great Insight into our Daughters Lives, August 9, 2009

By 

Nora A. Stlaurent "TBCN Founder" (Georgia) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Dear Mom: Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You to Know But Will Never Tell You (Paperback)

Melody's new book Dear Mom, is eye opening and comforting at the same time. On the front cover it says, "Everything your teenage daughter wants you to know but will NEVER tell you." How true is that! I did feel like these might be things my daughter would love to tell me, but wouldn't for fear of my reaction. It is crisp, gut level honest, and dynamic. I loved it.

God didn't send us an instruction manuel for parenting children, wouldn't that be nice! We soon discover as parents what worked for one child doesn't necessarily mean it will work with the next. We never get this parenting thing down pat. Thank you Melody, for writing this book about our daughter's hearts and lives; to help us remember what we went through as teenage girls. Oooh, the pain I remembered. Thanks for giving us hope in the middle of this pain.

This is not a book of "to do's" but a book that takes you to the real heart of our girls. It helped me have a deeper understanding and compassion for my daughter. She doesn't live such a carefree life after all. This book reveals teenage life today; it's heart felt and hysterical in parts. Here is a peek into a chapter Melody titled, "Things I don't like; don't like about me and things I don't like about you."

"When you were my age, did your mother approve of your appearance 24/7? I don't think so, but maybe I should talk to Grandma about this. I'm sure she'd have something to say."

"So are you starting to see that my life isn't as simple and fun and carefree as you like to believe? Are you feeling a tiny speck of empathy for me and girls like me, who are trying to find our way through this complicated, confusing, contradictory adolescent world, without being completely destroyed along the way?"

Here is a list of some of the chapters in this book. "Relationships confuse me sometimes, I need you but you can't make me admit it", "You say you listen but sometimes I just need you to hear.... I love how Melody Carlson wrote this book.

I know that I'll be referring to this book again and again; you will too. Melody gives great insight for moms to help develop a special relationship with our daughters. This will assist you in your attempts to stay connected with your teenage girl and figure out a few things about yourself along the way. Thank you Melody, for this very meaningful and sensitive parenting tool. It's a wonderful find and a great treasure.

Nora St. Laurent
Finding Hope Through Fiction
Book Club Servant Leader

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars Help for Moms of Teen Girls, May 15, 2009

By 

Elaine Littau "author of Nan's Journey, Elk's... (Texas Panhandle) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)   

This review is from: Dear Mom: Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You to Know But Will Never Tell You (Paperback)

Dear Mom -Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You To Know But Will Never Tell You by Melody Carlson
I just finished reading "Dear Mom, Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You To Know But Will Never Tell You" by Melody Carlson. It was an eye-opening read. It was written from a teen-age girl's perspective and I have to admit that it was spot on even though my teen age years were back in the 70's. It brought back a lot of memories of the confusion and social pressure of those formative years. I am sure that the pressures have amped up quite a bit since my teens.

It deals with how to give your daughter a compliment that she will actually believe. How to nurture confidence by your actions toward her. She is watching you so be authentic. Why do teen girls actually need those certain designer jeans. Proper protocol for dealing with your teen's friends and bad influences. How to ask her about everything. It is a must read and devour book for mothers of teen-age girls. Get it at http://randomhouse.com

4 of 5 people found the following review helpful:

3.0 out of 5 stars useful insights, frank input, no-holds barred, May 6, 2009

By 

Brian Dolleman (Seattle, WA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Dear Mom: Everything Your Teenage Daughter Wants You to Know But Will Never Tell You (Paperback)

Review (by Shari Dolleman):
Written from a teen daughter's perspective, this book is frank and forthright - sometimes even a bit "in your face." If you have a teen daughter, this is a good book for an "in her shoes" look at what it feels to be like a teenager... and what young girls need most from their moms during these transitional years.

Summary:
Every mom knows how communicating with a teenage girl can be difficult, even impossible at times. One-word answers. Defensive conversations. Daily arguments. How typical for teens to put up such barriers. All the while, moms truly long to know what their daughters really think.

Best-selling author Melody Carlson, whose books for women, teens, and children have sold more than three million copies, bridges this chasm with trusted insight. She speaks frankly in the voice of the teen daughters she's written for and she tells it like it is: struggles with identity, guys, friendship, and even parents--it's all here. The straight-talk to moms covers such things as "I need you, but you can't make me admit it," "I'm not as confident as I appear," and "I have friends. I need a mother."

Instead of focusing on outward behaviors, Dear Mom looks at a young woman's heart and reveals to moms:

how to talk to teens so they hear,
how to connect despite the differences of perspective or years and experiences,
and how strengthen the bond every mom and daughter ultimately wants.

The lively chapters in Dear Mom can be dipped into topically or used as a read-through tool by moms and daughters alike to understand what motivates or deflates, troubles or inspires--and just in time for Mother's Day and all the Mother's Days ahead.

Author Bio:
Melody Carlson is the award-winning author of more than one hundred books for adults, children, and teens, with sales totaling more than three million copies. Beloved for her Diary of a Teenage Girl and Notes from a Spinning Planet series, she's also the author of the women's novels Finding Alice (in production now for a Lifetime-TV movie), Crystal Lies, On This Day, These Boots Weren't Made for Walking, and A Mile in My Flip-Flops. A mother of two grown sons, Melody lives in central Oregon with her husband and chocolate lab retriever. She's a full-time writer and an avid gardener, biker, skier, and hiker.