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Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Claudia Black has worked in the field of addictive disorders for over thirty years. Her work is seminal to the underpinnings of the codependency and trauma field. She was a pioneer in working with children from alcoholic homes and establishing the need for treating not just the addicted person, but the entire family. Claudia's workshops, training seminars and professional consultation services are presented worldwide. Working with sex addiction specialist and pioneer Patrick Carnes for six years, Claudia expanded her work with families and facilitated groups with women whose male partners' were acting out with sexually compulsive behaviors. Deceived is Black's fourteenth book. She is best known for her book, It Will Never Happen To Me with over two million copies sold to date.  Today Claudia resides in the Pacific Northwest with her husband Jack and their two dogs, Quinn and Katie.
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Hazelden (February 20, 2009)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1592856985
  • ISBN-13: 978-1592856985
  • Product Dimensions: 9 x 6 x 0.7 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #310,123 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Claudia Black, M.S.W., Ph.D. is a renowned addictions and codependency expert, author and trainer internationally recognized for her pioneering and contemporary work with family systems and addictive disorders. Since the 1970s Dr. Black's work has encompassed the impact of addiction on young and adult children. She has offered models of intervention and treatment related to family violence, multi-addictions, relapse, anger, depression and women's issues. Dr. Black designs and presents training workshops and seminars to professional audiences in the field of family service, mental health, addiction and correctional services. Claudia is currently the Senior Clinical and Family Services Advisor for the Las Vegas Recovery Center. She serves on the Advisory Board for the National Association of Children of Alcoholics, and the Advisory Council of the Moyer Foundation. A schedule of Claudia's events are on her website claudiablack.com

Claudia is the author of It Will Never Happen To Me, Changing Course, My Dad Loves Me, My Dad Has A Disease, Repeat After Me, It's Never Too Late To Have A Happy Childhood, Relapse Toolkit, A Hole in the Sidewalk, Depression Strategies, Straight Talk, The Stamp Game, Family Strategies, Anger Strategies, Deceived: Facing Sexual Betrayal, Lies and Secrets, The Truth Begins With You and her newest title, Intimate Treason: Healing the Trauma for Partners Confronting Sex Addiction. She has produced seven audio CDs addressing issues of addiction and recovery. They are A Time for Healing, Putting the Past Behind, Triggers, Emotional Baggage, Trauma in the Addicted Family, Imageries and Letting Go Imageries. And, she has over 20 DVDs for professionals to use working with families and clients.


Dr. Black has been a keynote speaker on Capitol Hill in Washington, D.C. and on Parliament Hill in Ottawa, Canada. Her workshops have been presented to an extraordinarily wide array of audiences including military academies, prison systems, medical schools, and extensive mental health and addiction programs. Claudia has extensive multi-cultural experiences working with agencies and audiences in Japan, Brazil, Australia, Scotland, Iceland, Germany, England and Canada. Many of her books and videos have been translated and published abroad. Dr. Black is the recipient of numerous national awards including the 2004 Distinguished Alumni Award from the University of Washington School of Social Work.


Claudia resides in the Pacific Northwest.

Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

17 of 17 people found the following review helpful By R. Glackin on April 9, 2009
Format: Paperback
Claudia Black takes you on a compassionate and healing journey through the confusion, anger and self doubt which results from sexual betrayal. Through the sharing her subjects' personal strories, Claudia explains how painful and destructive sexual betrayal is to all of those involved. She explains, that the behavior and thinking of many who have multiple affairs, parallels the behaviors and thinking of an addict.

You may ask "Why do her subjects stay when they have been betrayed?" The answers are found in family of origin dynamics.

Claudia explains how the development of a stonger self comes from facing the truth about your relationship. Through the process of recovery, you learn to live in your truth as a stonger and healthier partner.
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18 of 19 people found the following review helpful By JCS on April 11, 2009
Format: Paperback
This book is excellent! Finally, a book that addresses this dark issue and brings it into the light. Unfortunately, this is a problem that is becoming more commonplace and requires some guidence. Claudia is a great guide. Decieved is comprehensive, addressing every aspect of this painful situation. Claudia Black acurately captures what it is like to be "deceived" by your partner with great compassion. She will also assists in helping you understand the underlying issues that allow you to come to resolution and heal.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Jennifer L. Struck on September 18, 2009
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
If you are a woman, and feel betrayed or deceived and feel like no one will understand or knows how you feel;You need to read this book, you will not feel all alone any longer. The honesty and accuracy in which it is written just shocked and amazed me. No one wants to talk about this hurtful subject. It just helps to know you are not crazy, and not alone. Warning though; do not read in a public place! You will cry. I have a friend who has also gone through similar trials, I bought her a copy.
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12 of 12 people found the following review helpful By drstc on April 17, 2009
Format: Paperback
As a psychologist, I find this book immensely helpful and am recommending it to patients.
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15 of 17 people found the following review helpful By IHeartCupcakes on August 9, 2010
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I ordered this book after divorcing my now ex-husband for adultery. I thought it would be about recoving from sexual betrayal (adultery), as the title states. However, it is a book about sexual addiction. I would not classify my ex-husband as a sex addict after reading the entire book, so most of it was not applicable. Although it did have some content that helped me, all in all, I wish it would have something about sex addiction in the title to more clearly state what this book is mainly about.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By dwilson on November 4, 2010
Format: Paperback
I hate that I needed to read this book, but during my journey, this has been one of my most helpful resources. It addresses how women feel and what steps to take to start healing in an effective way.

My other favorite resource is "Hope after Betrayal" by Meg Wilson which helps to fill in the gaps with lots of biblical and spiritual help.
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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful By KC on September 21, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
I cannot say enough how damaging this book is for partners of sex addicts. All it does is point fingers at the betrayed. The coaddict model is not based in the reality of the deception that occurs. It assumes knowledge of and accepting behavior on the part of the partner. This is not the case. The vast majority of sex addicts are liars and manipulators. The partners DO NOT KNOW AND DO NOT PARTICIPATE IN THE ADDICTION. Their actions do not accept our intensify the addiction. To lay the blame at their feet is destructive. Please read other books that use the trauma model. They do not blame the victim.
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11 of 14 people found the following review helpful By RS on May 23, 2011
Format: Kindle Edition
I bought this book thinking it would help me but it seems it was more narrowly focused than I had thought. I didn't recognize myself in the chapter about how 'you didn't get here by accident' - although perhaps it's because my situation is a little different - my partner is at least somewhat homosexually oriented and this was the cause of his ongoing hidden sexual obsessing and turning away from me sexually. I'd say the book's not for everyone who has experienced sexual problems and infidelity in marriage - and don't adjust your thinking if you don't think you fit the 'mould' of the so-called coaddict wife/partner either. Maybe you're not.
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