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Destructive Relationships: A Guide to Changing the Unhealthy Relationships in Your Life Hardcover – September, 2002


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Product Details

  • Hardcover: 350 pages
  • Publisher: Jodere Group (September 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1588720268
  • ISBN-13: 978-1588720269
  • Product Dimensions: 9.3 x 6.4 x 1.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 1.5 pounds
  • Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,111,513 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Dr. Jill Murray is fast becoming the leading authority on destructive relationships. A licensed psychotherapist with a private practice in Southern California, she is a much in-demand speaker for high school students, parents, domestic violence groups, healthcare professionals and teachers across the country. With her first book BUT I LOVE HIM: Protecting Your Teen Daughter from Controlling, Abusive Dating Relationships, she established herself as a national expert on abusive relationships. She has made several appearances on OPRAH, MONTEL and many other national shows.

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Customer Reviews

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

13 of 13 people found the following review helpful By Harold McFarland HALL OF FAMEVINE VOICE on July 14, 2003
Format: Hardcover
While there are many types of destructive relationships this book deals primarily with abusive ones. These relationships may be between husband and wife, boss and employee, friends, parents, children, or any other group of people. The relationships may be physically abusive, or they may be emotionally, sexually, or verbally abusive. "Destructive Relationships" walks the reader through warning signs that a relationship might be unhealthy by defining what is normal and what is not. The authors follow that up with an excellent look at self-esteem issues and how to deal with them effectively instead of using ineffective coping mechanisms. Finally Dr. Murray shows you the pathway to a positive future with healthy relationships.
The sections on the consequences of abusive relationships were exceptional. They defined not only the consequence but also the various ways in which those consequences manifest themselves. Each section then ended with an activity you can do to help lessen the power of the consequence. There is also an excellent chapter on dealing with abusers in the real world.
"Destructive Relationships" is a highly recommended read for many people: for anyone involved in such relationships and blaming themselves, for people who seem to always be getting into abusive relationships, or anyone who knows someone in such a relationship. It is not a miracle answer, but a pathway that the person must travel to achieve freedom from the grip of low self-esteem, emotional fear, shame, guilt, and other consequences of destructive relationships.
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11 of 11 people found the following review helpful By Melodye Shore on January 21, 2004
Format: Hardcover
It's not always the catastrophic event that destroys our relationships; indeed, the most perilous of dangers can be those that do subtle, insidious damage - often over time rather than all at once. In Destructive Relationships, Dr. Jill Murray inspects with us the beliefs, feelings, and actions that serve as foundation for our connections to others. She identifies the symptoms, causes, and consequences of destructive relationships. And, in the process, she provides for the reader a toolbox of skills and attitudes necessary to build positive, healthy relationships.

Through a variety of case studies, Dr. Murray illustrates the warning signs of destructive relationships. Importantly, she defines and describes the many types of abuse that can occur in a relationship: physical, emotional, sexual, and verbal. She demonstrates clearly that these abusive relationships can cause immediate or long-term, slight or devastating damage - to us and to those with whom we connect. And on an optimistic, empowering note, the author provides for the reader a blueprint for changing the dynamics of current and future relationships.

Destructive Relationships is an important book for anyone interested in establishing and maintaining healthy, positive relationships. Readers will learn to identify and apply those attitudes and skills that best nurture healthy, positive relationships with others. In doing so, they will better equip themselves to build interpersonal connections that are safe and solid - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Melodye Shore on January 21, 2004
Format: Hardcover
It's not always the catastrophic event that destroys our relationships; indeed, the most perilous of dangers can be those that do subtle, insidious damage - often over time rather than all at once. In Destructive Relationships, Dr. Jill Murray inspects with us the beliefs, feelings, and actions that serve as foundation for our connections to others. She identifies the symptoms, causes, and consequences of destructive relationships. And, in the process, she provides for the reader a toolbox of skills and attitudes necessary to build positive, healthy relationships.

Through a variety of case studies, Dr. Murray illustrates the warning signs of destructive relationships. Importantly, she defines and describes the many types of abuse that can occur in a relationship: physical, emotional, sexual, and verbal. She demonstrates clearly that these abusive relationships can cause immediate or long-term, slight or devastating damage - to us and to those with whom we connect. And on an optimistic, empowering note, the author provides for the reader a blueprint for changing the dynamics of current and future relationships.

Destructive Relationships is an important book for anyone interested in establishing and maintaining healthy, positive relationships. Readers will learn to identify and apply those attitudes and skills that best nurture healthy, positive relationships with others. In doing so, they will better equip themselves to build interpersonal connections that are safe and solid - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
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By Mia on July 26, 2012
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
This book was a great read. in depth and enlightening and I am going to read it again. The author touch on things i never before realized were happening until now.
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