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Isaacs, who is Director of the Dialogue Project at MIT and a consultant to major corporations, including AT&T and Intel, believes that corporate, political, and personal communication can be a process of thinking together--as opposed to thinking alone, and then trying to convince others of our positions by refusing to consider other opinions, withholding information, and ultimately getting angry and defensive. This is not pie-in-the-sky, let's-all-hold-hands-and-sing stuff. He offers concrete ideas for both listening and speaking; for avoiding the forces that undermine meaningful conversation; for changing the physical setting of the dialogue to change its quality. The outcome, he says, can be quite different from the traditional winner-loser structure of arguments and debates. Businesses can make more reasoned decisions, and thus earn more money. Governments can create peaceful resolutions to seemingly intractable problems. (For example, Isaacs cites secret conversations between Nelson Mandela and F.W. de Klerk in South Africa, which occurred over a number of years, while Mandela was still under arrest and led to a new framework for their country.) And, although this is a book primarily geared toward managers, even married couples can learn a few new ways to communicate. --Lou Schuler
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According to the subtitle, Isaacs provides "a pioneering approach to communicating in business and in life." This he does with insight and eloquence. There is a great need for what this book provides, especially now as organizations are (finally) beginning to appreciate the importance of supporting (indeed nourishing) the personal as well as the professional development of their "human capital" The word "dialogue" denotes conversation between two or more persons. Moreover, the original meaning of the word "conversation" is to turn around, to transform; later, the word's meaning evolved to "living, dwelling, and associating with others." Today, most of us think of conversation as "talk." Some of us think of it as a "lost art." Isaacs obviously has both words clearly in mind as he introduces his "pioneering approach." His purpose is to explain HOW effective dialogue, dialogue which is "about a shared inquiry, a way of thinking and reflecting together", can increase and enhance human dignity and understanding. How important is face-to-face communication? My own opinion is that it is more important now than ever before. However, again my opinion, the quality of face-to-face communication has rapidly deteriorated in this age of high-speed electronic "connectivity."
Isaacs' book is organized into five "Parts": What Is Dialogue; Building Capacity for New Behavior (ie listening, respecting, suspending, and voicing); Predictive Intuition; Architecture of the Invisible; and Widening the Circle. several For me, one of the most important of Isaacs' themes is so obvious, so simple: Show your respect for others by listening carefully to what they say. Dialogue worthy of the name is based on mutual respect. Hence the importance of attitude. Dialogue worthy of the name requires mastery of certain skills which can be taught. Isaacs provides all manner of practical suggestions as to HOW (a) to establish the proper attitude within any organization and (b) to strengthen the specific skills needed to sustain that attitude.
Near the end of his brilliant book, Isaacs observes: "Dialogue enables a `free flow of meaning,' which has the potential of transforming the power relationships among the people concerned. As this free flow emerges, it becomes quite apparent that no one person owns this flow and that no one can legislate it. People can learn to embody it, and in a sense serve it. This is perhaps the most significant shift possible in dialogue: that power is no longer the province of a person in a role, or any single individual, but at the level of alignment an individual or group has with Life itself." If the comments expressed in this brief excerpt speak to your own needs and/or the needs of your organization, you don't need my endorsement. You already know what to do: Buy the book.
It has been well worth the walk.
Isaacs both knows his stuff and has done his homework. He participated with David Bohm and others in the early dialogue sessions, and remais quite true to the spirit and intent of Bohm's work. He also brings depth of experience with subsequent dialogue work, and breadth of supporting ideas from eclectic sources to his description of the practice of deepened and enriched conversation. Few have experimented with dialogue in as many settings, and few have linked this current practice with as many related disciplines as Isaacs has.
To me, Isaacs presents dialogue as a world view, moreso than a set of conversational skills and techniques, remarkable moments in communication, group pain relief, or organizational change practice (as I feel other authors have done). Yet dialogue may play an important role in all of the above, and he does offer practical examples and approaches to try.
As practitioner, researcher, and occasional critic of dialogue, I appreciated revisiting its deeper roots. I particularly liked the discussion of dialogue and the senses of seeing and hearing. I hadn't thought of listening as geographic, before! Nor had I thought of 'participation' in quite the way he describes. At several points, I found it helpful to stop, put the book down, and think through the implications. (Indeed, I may be a little slow, but even so, I recommend you read this book reflectively!)
I recommend looking over the diagrams in the appendix, pp. 418-420, and keeping finger or handy Amazon.com bookmark there for frequent reference as you read. I discovered them rather late, and wished I'd gotten to them earlier. They provide the map as you follow Isaacs rather deep into the territory.
There are many gems throughout for learning and reflection. Read, reflect, and be enriched!
"Respect also means honoring people's boundries to the point of protecting them. If you respect someone, you do not intrude. At the same time, if you respect someone, you do not withhold yourself or distance yourself from them. I have heard many people claim they were respecting someone by leaving them alone, when in fact they were simpley distancing themselves from something they did not want to deal with. When we respect someone, we accept that they have thinks to teach us."..."Treat the person next to you as a teacher. What is it that they have to teach you that you do not now know? Listening to them in this way, you discover things that might surprise you."..."Respect is, in this sense, looking for what is highest and best in a person and treating them as a mystery that you can never fully comprehend. They are a part of the whole, and, in a very particular sense, a part of us." - PP 114-117
"Every conversation has its own acoustics. Each one takes place in an environment that has both physical, or external, dimensions as well as internal, or mental and emotional, dimensions. There is, in other words, an invisible architecture to the container. Most such structures are made for discussion, for thinking alone. We have very few designed for thinking together, for dialogue." - P 247
This is my favorite quote in the entire book, I see it in my relationships with the world each and every day: "The Internet can be seen as the attempt of your literate and isolated culture to somehow return to community. People seem to imagine that if we are all digitally connected, then we would all be in touch, and the great malaise of the age - the isolation, pace, disconnection that many of us feel - would be allayed. But so far the digital revolution is giving us connection but not contact"..."one simple touch of a human hand could far exceed all the impact of all the digital libraries in the land." - PP 388-389
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