Diana in Search of Herself: Portrait of a Troubled Princess [Hardcover]

Sally Bedell Smith (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: August 25, 1999

Diana in Search of Herself is the first authoritative biography of one of the most fabled women of the century. Even those who knew Princess Diana will be surprised by author Sally Bedell Smith's insightful and haunting portrait of Diana's inner life.

For all that has been written about Diana--the books, the commemorative magazines, the thousands of newspaper articles--we have lacked a sophisticated understanding of the woman, her motivations, and her extreme needs. Most books have been exercises in hagiography or character assassination, sometimes both in the same volume. Sally Bedell Smith, the acclaimed biographer, former New York Times reporter, and Vanity Fair contributing editor, has written the first truly balanced and nuanced portrait of the Princess of Wales, in all her emotional complexity.

Drawing on scores of interviews with friends and associates who had not previously talked about Diana, Ms. Smith explores the events and relationships that shaped the Princess, the flashpoints that sent her careening through life, her deep feelings of unworthiness, her view of men, and her perpetual journey toward a better sense of self. By making connections not previously explored, this book allows readers to see Diana as she really was, from her birth to her tragic death.

Original in its reporting and surprising in its conclusions about the severity of Diana's mental-health problems, Diana in Search of Herself is the smartest and most substantive biography ever written about this mesmerizing woman.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

The Diana who was in search of herself was, according to this relatively beefy addition to the writings on the late princess, engaged in a futile exercise. Born after her parents tried three unsuccessful times to produce a male heir--two older sisters and a brother who died within hours of birth preceded Diana Spencer's arrival--she felt unwanted from the start. Her mother's abandonment of the family six years later compounded Diana's feelings of self-worthlessness. At a tender age, the girl who would grow up to be the beloved Princess of Wales had already irrevocably lost her sense of self. The book, which relies heavily on the accounts of anonymous intimates of the late princess, describes her as a deeply conflicted character. A friend is quoted as saying, "Her dark side was that of a wounded trapped animal ... and her bright side was that of a luminous being." The strikingly tall, blond princess who cradled young cancer victims and graciously accepted flowers from admirers, who frolicked on camera with her young sons and flashed her sparkling smile as she exited limousines, was often sulky, depressed, and vengeful in private. "Why?" one might wonder--if volumes hadn't already been written about the awful truth of her life.

Author Sally Bedell Smith revisits the well-trod ground of Charles's continuing love affair with Camilla Parker Bowles, Diana's intimidation by her royal in-laws, and her push-me, pull-me relationship with the voracious paparazzi. In addition, she details Diana's numerous love affairs and her acts of self-mutilation and bizarre behavior, such as the incident in which she tap-danced alone in her room until she wore down the wood parquet. Prince Charles comes off as a sympathetic if somewhat wimpy character, while, as the book progresses, Diana grows into a woman navigating the fine line between neurosis and full-blown psychosis. At the time of her marriage, the princess is quoted as saying she was "so in love with my husband that I couldn't take my eyes off him. I just absolutely thought I was the luckiest girl in the world." Years later, she would recall this same day thus: "The day I walked down the aisle at St. Paul's Cathedral, I felt that my personality was taken away from me, and I was taken over by the royal machine." Her bulimia (even while pregnant with Prince William), paranoia, lying, and flightiness are all confirmed in Smith's tome but they are commingled with testimonials to the late princess's generosity, intuition, genuine warmth, and ability to put anyone at ease. Diana was fine--to wit sane--as long as she was in a safe environment. The bosom of the royal family was not one of those havens. But she wasn't a passive victim--her famous comment about her marriage being overcrowded, involving three people, presumably herself, the prince, and Parker Bowles--wasn't quite true, as she was also having an affair at the time, bringing the number up to four.

All of these excruciating details--including Smith's analysis of how long the Dodi and Diana match would have lasted, had they not been killed that night in Paris--seem to be carefully researched and attributed when the source allows it, and build to the grand crescendo of the book, in which Smith proffers her diagnosis of the princess's mental health. The punchline here is that the tabloid assertions that hounded Diana throughout her lifetime, asserting that she was "loony," "potty," a "basket case," or "barking mad," may have held more than a kernel of truth. But if the princess was as expert a manipulator as the book suggests, no one, it seems, could ever hope to know the whole truth. --Jordana Moskowitz

From Publishers Weekly

Devotees who remember Princess Diana as a beautiful, warm-hearted mother dedicated to good works, whom an adulterous husband and the British Royal family unfairly victimized, will find little comfort in this treatment of her life. Smith relentlessly but convincingly portrays Diana as a woman with severe psychological problems (characterized here as a "borderline personality") who never overcame a serious eating disorder and was unable to sustain relationships. Based on research and interviews with Diana's friends, Smith (Reflected Glory: The Life of Pamela Harriman) carefully presents Diana's childhood as darkened by divorce and neglect, leaving Diana with deep feelings of unworthiness; by the time of her marriage she was, Smith contends, not only a bulimic but also a pathological liar. According to Smith, Prince Charles had completely severed relations with Camilla Parker-Bowles out of determination to make his marriage work, and did not revive his affair with her until the relationship with his wife fell apart. Diana, certain that Charles was still seeing Camilla from the date of their wedding, retaliated with a series of tawdry romances, and also engaged in self-mutilation, binge eating and other erratic behaviors that alienated Charles. Though Smith acknowledges that the princess dearly loved her sons, she also describes occasions when Diana placed emotional demands on them that they were too young to handle. This is a sharply etched and engrossing study of an insecure and emotionally damaged woman coming apart at the seams. Photos not seen by PW. 11-city tour; 20-city TV and radio satellite tour. First serial to People magazine. (Sept.)
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc.

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Product Details

• Hardcover: 464 pages
• Publisher: Crown; 1st edition (August 25, 1999)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0812930304
• ISBN-13: 978-0812930306
• Product Dimensions: 9.4 x 6.5 x 1.7 inches
• Shipping Weight: 2 pounds
• Average Customer Review: 3.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (137 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #544,427 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #40 in Books > Biographies & Memoirs > Leaders & Notable People > Royalty > Princess Diana

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

23 of 26 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars A sad, compelling portrait of a media superstar, July 4, 2000

By 

New World Smurf "new_world_smurf" (Richmond, Virginia) - See all my reviews
(VINE VOICE)   

This review is from: Diana in Search of Herself: Portrait of a Troubled Princess (Hardcover)

The world loves a princess, particularly if that princess is tall, blond, and beautiful, with a shy smile and sweet public manners. Nearly three years after her untimely death, opinions are still sharply divided on Princess Diana, and "Diana In Search Of Herself" will undoubtedly divide them even more. Sally Bedell Smith provides arguably the most balanced view of a woman who seems to have been very unbalanced. Mercurial at best, borderline psychotic at worst, Diana whirled through her superstardom like a child unable to choose which toy to play with next. Smith admirably documents Diana's love/hate affair with the media, the manipulations of her children, particularly Prince William, and her desperate search for the peace she herself seems to have pushed away with both hands. If there was ever a human being who personified the old cliche, "Be careful what you wish for," it was Diana. Diana worshippers loathe this book--their goddess could never have feet of clay--but for the rest of us, it is ultimately a sobering portrait of a woman whose beauty and wealth could not save her from herself.

25 of 29 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Don't read this book if you want to keep loving Diana, December 23, 1999

By 

Mariah - See all my reviews

This review is from: Diana in Search of Herself: Portrait of a Troubled Princess (Hardcover)

I have been a Diana-adorer since she first came to prominence when I was a young girl. In fact, I have a photograph of myself as a 15-year old in my bedroom, and behold, on the wall behind me is a photograph of the young Diana Spencer walking down a London street -- still my favorite image of her. Since discovering ebay I have been gleefully adding to my collection of Diana-paraphernalia.

So I was excited to see this book come out. Finally! I thought. A REAL biography, not some piece of tabloid tripe written by some guy who was home sick on the day they taught *journalism* in journalism school. And as a person who has read numerous books and articles on Diana, watched umpteen television specials on video, and has all the facts of the case memorized, I was certainly prepared to throw this one on the trash heap if it was not as informative and well-researched as I expected.

Well, folks, be careful what you wish for, because you might just get it. This book is extremely well written. It is extensively researched. It has 30+ pages of notes and citations at the end, appendiced for anyone to reference. The author has read just about every paparazzi article on the Princess and compared them on a timeline of actual events in the Princess' life, interviewed dozens upon dozens of people, most of whom are actually named (and in fact specifies that 68 are not named), and has laid bare every iota of this woman's existence.

Unfortunately, it will be the last Diana book I ever buy or read. What is the point? By the time I had finished this incredibly detailed book, I simply looked around at my shrine to the mystery of Diana and threw up my hands.

My idol was vain, selfish, paranoid, unreasonable and insane. Covered over with a thin veneer of charm and good looks. The author of this book may be wrong. But as a writer and researcher myself, i can tell she definitely did her homework. She has constructed a premise and argued for it, and I am convinced by the evidence.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go write a letter of apology to the Prince of Wales for all the mean things I believed and said about him.

12 of 13 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars This Look Behind the Smile Reveals A Sad, Damaged Princess, August 27, 1999

By 

C. Ross (Los Angeles, CA USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Diana in Search of Herself: Portrait of a Troubled Princess (Hardcover)

I have just finished "Diana In Search of Herself" and suspect Sally Bedell Smith will catch all sorts of hell for it. I also think the story is largely true and this made it sadder still. I am a huge fan of Diana but always suspected her amazing face hid a lot of misery. Smith's work is thorough and delivered with great effect and authority. I don't think I seriouly considered how much pain there could have been - one gets side tracked by the beauty, the clothes and all the other trappings of her life. When she died, I did realize her walk down the aisle of St. Paul's in 1981 was the first choreographed step into a hall of mirrors from which she would never escape. This book takes us into that hall and it's not a pleasant place to be. I saw myself at a younger age, repeatedly - grateful that I managed to live past 36 because I didn't get it right until about I was about 42. I think many women will identify even more strongly with Diana after reading this book. Baby boomer women born through the early 60's grew up in confusing times. Learning from Smith's book how deeply her pain, confusion and recognizable symptoms were, I can't imagine she could smile at all let alone on cue. It hurts to realize the avenues of treatment were all but forbidden to her - in fact or in her own fear of retribution. There was a moment - after she died -when people were angry because they felt she had lost her chance at a happy future but this book makes that wishful thinking very unlikely. It is hard to accept but quite believable, that as her nest grew emptier and her choices in men grew worse she would have spun out of control sooner than later. Perhaps that trip through the tunnel was an awful fulfillment of the magic thinking, omens and portents Smith mentions Diana believing. It was a sad and disturbing book - I imagine the author must have felt this as she became more embroiled in it. It has definitely changed some of my perceptions about Diana - although nothing can change how lovely she was for all those years. I am surprised she didn't drink like a fish or throw public fits. The desire for constant approval and attention is exhausting and consuming. There is never enough until one can learn to be alone happily. I can empathize tremendously. Many of us who have gotten better in some way or another can pinpoint what stopped or helped us; I have a strong streak of pragmatism that she lacked. I don't, however, believe Diana would have had a miraculous epiphany and that is sadder still - she couldn't or wouldn't see deeply enough and no one would tell her nor would she have listened if they had. The real pity is that when one friend was honest, she dropped them and there were always others ready to jump into the space they left. I can't say I enjoyed the book - but I don't think it was one meant to be enjoyed - it was well written and hard to put down - and the research was excellent. I think Smith did a hard job well and I think anyone who admired or loved the Princess of Wales at all should read it. Die hard Diana protectors and fans will surely hurl bricks at the author for what they may see as the maligning of their Princess. I don't think this part of the truth diminishes her at all. I think enough people - the media in particular and her friends and family, grew rich and smug on her misery to be called more than just enablers - the book names names and we all come away knowing that she was encouraged in her behavior by anyone who wanted a photo, a story or a little of the glow that spilled onto them from her presence. She may have been her own worst enemy but no one who claimed to care for her did much to change this. Shame on them. More than anything, I wish none of it were true. I know otherwise though because I have been there with many of my generation. It isn't pretty no matter how pretty you are. What is even less pretty is that rarely are borderlines or near borderlines fortunate enough to fall off the edge to safety - I was very lucky. I am so sorry she wasn't. I urge people to read this insightful book about this misunderstood and lonely Princess and I hope they will see past what they may feel are perceived slights to Diana. What they will realize is that she was more like many of us than we ever imagined. It is a shame no one was able to really touch her and guide her back to a safe, happy place where she could enjoy herself as much as we all enjoyed her. I recommend "Diana, In Search of Herself" highly - for the important truths we need to know to better understand both the life and death of Diana, Princess of Wales.