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Die Stupid [Kindle Edition]

Owen Fusterbuster
3.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (7 customer reviews)

Kindle Price: $0.99

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Book Description

Dirk Squeezer is an ex-Special Forces operative who has gone off the grid after scrubbing the public databases of every scrap of information about him except his shoe size (28 EEE). But when the US government finds itself facing an unprecedented crisis, its top security officer knows there is only one man for the job - a man with a steely gaze, an iron constitution, and grotesquely oversized feet - a man who will live strong, fight hard, and die stupid.

Tracked down and recruited for the mission, Squeezer must team up with voluptuous FBI Female Special Agent Robin Sapsucker and infiltrate the hideout of the brilliant, evil, and curiously piglike criminal mastermind Connor Hogshead. Along the way he matches wits with tattooed, sexually ambiguous Swedish computer expert Limpet Salamander, as he struggles to foil Hogshead's plan for world domination -- a plan known only by its enigmatic codename: Squirrelageddon.

Packed with tension, stuffed with suspense, and bristling with idiocy, DIE STUPID is a modern masterpiece of moronic mayhem. Check out these unsolicited reviews:

"I wish I were alive to read it!" - William Shakespeare

"A painful experience." - the Marquis de Sade

"That's it! I'm going back in the well." - Little Timmy from LASSIE

Buy DIE STUPID today, and regret it tomorrow ... and for the rest of your life.

Product Details

  • File Size: 391 KB
  • Print Length: 139 pages
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #377,425 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

3.6 out of 5 stars
3.6 out of 5 stars
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Die Stupid August 8, 2011
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"Die Stupid" is funny! Once in awhile, people need to just get over themselves and laugh out loud, and I know I, personally, did a lot of laughing! A writer should be able to step outside their normal genre once in awhile, just for a change. This book reminds me of John Lennon's work, back when he was writing things like "Skywriting by Word of Mouth".
I found it a welcome change, after the initial shock !
As an editor, most of the stuff I read is pretty dull. This book surely isn't! Put your stereotypes aside and see for yourself!
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars So funny I laughed out loud August 8, 2011
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I've never provided my own laugh track for a book, but couldn't help myself with DIE STUPID. The only way I can describe this book is in movie terms: CARL HIAASEN meets HUNTER THOMPSON meets FIRESIGN THEATRE.

I had to put the book down often just to absorb how ridiculously funny it was.

Warning - read in short increments, otherwise you might laugh so hard you'll start to hyperventilate and need oxygen.
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1.0 out of 5 stars Don't do it! March 12, 2014
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The worst .94 cents I ever spent on Amazon. Every sentence in the first six pages was some stupid cliche or poor attempt at humor. And six pages was as far as I could stand. Don't waste your money. Go get something from the McDonalds Dollar Menu. Even the diahrea an hour later is better than this book!
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5.0 out of 5 stars Die To Be Stupid April 5, 2012
By Louis R
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I love this kind of off the wall humor. I laughed so hard it woke my wife up. I sure do hope to see more books like this one. I think it's great that Michael Prescott did something different from his normal writing. I love his mystery thrillers, but sometimes it's good to try other things. I hope to see a sequal soon.
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