Customer Reviews

Disrupting Grace: A Story of Relinquishment and Healing

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4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(0)
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I loved this book! Even though it is a sad book, it is a perfect picture of God's grace.
This book is a testament in that not all adoption stories end well, sometimes love is not enough.
Kristen has told her story remarkably well and with much emphasis on not making her and her family out to be victims; her goal was to share her story and what she has learned since this time.

I just finished reading Disrupting Grace. It's a wonderful story. It's heartbreaking but so very informative. It was healing for me because I thought I was the only mother with a child who refused to let me hold him or hug him and did things to emotionally hurt me.

It would be even harder to understand that reaction from a child you have brought out of poverty to adopt into your family.

You can't put this book down once you open it. You go with the author into her home. You meet her husband and children and you share the anticipation as they bring their baby home from Korea.

You feel the hurt from lost dreams and you understand the choice they made.

It's a must read for anyone planning to adopt a child. It's wonderful when things work out but everyone needs to know what to do when something just isn't right.

When reading this book I felt the author was telling our story. We too had a very difficult international adoption experience that lasted 2 and half years before it too ended in disruption. The guilt you feel, especially as a christian who is supposed to have all the answers is tremendous. I needed this book to help heal, to know that God is still good, to accept that it wasn't all my fault that it didn't work out. You are told over and over again how if you just do such and such your child will heal but sometimes you can do everything by the book but your child still will not heal for whatever reason. We, just like the author tried everything to help our child heal. We exhausted ourselves emotionally and financially and spiritually and the problem only got worse. Unfortunately I have been hearing more and more stories similar to ours and it is so sad. Many people go into adoption unprepared and even naive and the available resources to help these families afterwards are so very limited. To my knowledge there is no other book like this out there and I am so glad that I found it.

Bring It On! Communications sent me "Disrupting Grace: A story of relinquishment and healing" by Kristen Richburg to review.

"We have two children. We used to have three. Our third child didn't grow up and leave home, she didn't die. We relinquished her. Aren't adoption stories supposed to have happy endings? While there are many adoption stories that do have happy endings, this is not one of them. And we've come to learn we are not alone. More and more families are finding themselves in situations similar to ours, feeling like there is no way out. This book is my story of adopting a child who was unable to attach. It is a chronicle of investment and sacrifice in our daughter, the pain and loss we experienced, the grief of darkened hopes and loss of a dream. It is also a story of grace and healing, of relinquishment and new beginnings." - Deep River Books website

I was very curious about this book. We are hearing more and more about adoption these days which is a very good thing! We are a family that intends to adopt at some point in our lives. We have family members who have adopted. So, what kind of story leads to the end of an unhappy adoption?

I think I felt every feeling reading this book. I felt the agony of this family as they tried for 5 years to meet the needs of a precious little girl. I felt their agony when they realized that this little girl may thrive better somewhere else. This is a heart-breaking story of God's grace. A story of how faithfully He meets us when we are at the end of ourself.

This book was hard to read and very emotional. It ended in a difficult way. But it is real and gives give glory to God for His hand at work in their very painful situation. This book remind us that He is at work in the good times and the bad times.

I recently finished reading a book entitled Disrupting Grace by Kristen Richburg published by VMI Publishers.

Within the pages the author opens up her heart and her life to the reality of an adoption that didn't turn out with the happy ending that they expected. She is so transparent that you feel her emotions as though you were going through them with her.

Here is an exerpt from the back cover:

Often we hear stories of adoption and happy endings, but what about the adoptions that don't work out? What are families to do when despite all efforts, their child isn't thriving, and the rest of the family is coming apart at the seams? Isolated families are running out of hope, battling pain, experienceing grief and the loss of a dream....

Disrupting Grace describes Richburg's journey through mothering, and relinquishing an adopted child, and how through that experience, her shallow and small understanding of grace was enlarged and forever changed.

Everything about this book drew me deeper into the pages. The cover was beautifully done.

Being one who has experienced adoption (one of my brother-in-laws was adopted by my in-laws at a young age) and knowing the joys and heartaches that can accompany it, I can see how not every story always has a Fairy Tale ending. I felt her pain and "guilt" of deciding to relinquish her daughter, yet saw that it was the only way to "save" this little girl and her own family from sinking to the bottom of a pit.

The author did a great job relating the story in a way that really made you feel as though you experienced it with her. I found myself asking "could I do that?" Sometimes the right choice is a very hard one to make.

The back cover of the book gave a wonderful description that truly made you want to read more.

This a very powerful book. As a narrative, it is straight-forward and honest. The book has content that is very painful to anybody that has worked, known, or loved a child with special needs. It is a painful reminder of the failure of society for our children. But it is also a precious reminder that our Savior will always love us.

S

This book is a great read! Made my heart break for both the mother and her daughter, Emma. Anyone considering adoption should read this one!