Don't Bet on the Prince! How To Have The Man You Want by Betting on Yourself [Paperback]

Gilda Carle (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: January 15, 1999

When we dream of princes, we wake up with toads. What's a woman to do when one Prince Charming after another turns out to be a frog? According to Dr. Gilda Carle, women should never bestow "princely" expectations on men because it leaves men in control of-- and women in denial about-- the fundamental nature of the relationship. Often in their desire to be swept away and protected, women fail to cultivate their own internal strength.

In order to succeed in love, women need to establish their own personal power, project it, and attract partners who respect it and reflect it. A woman's primary love should be the love she gives herself-- because, ultimately, how she treats herself sends a message about how she expects others to treat her. Dr. Gilda shows you how you can find a worthy mate by using her five key tenets:

* Ask for what you need and believe you deserve to get
* Project a Power Image
* Give from the overflow, not from the core
* Know how to receive
* Enjoy being alone

With a colorful assortment of case histories, insightful Self-Assessments, memorable Gilda-Grams, and plenty of humor to illustrate her practical and proven advice, Dr. Gilda reveals how to achieve a self-made version of happily-ever-after.

Editorial Reviews

Amazon.com Review

No matter how far women may have come--in education, in the workplace, in becoming independent--too many of us are still waiting to be rescued by Prince Charming. Well stop waiting, Dr. Gilda Carle tells us. He ain't coming and it's time we took responsibility for ourselves.

Don't Bet on the Prince: How to Have the Man You Want by Betting on Yourself is a hard-hitting book that tells it as it is: while most women continue to seek their Prince Charming, what they're most likely to end up with is "Mr. Cheap, Mr. Bad-Mannered, Mr. Ill-Tempered ... Mr. My-Wife-Doesn't-Understand-Me." This is not a male-bashing book. This is a guide to helping women become stronger and more independent, becoming "Will-Be" women instead of "Wanna-Be" women. To the women who have the unfortunate tendency to lose themselves in their relationships, causing their self-esteem to plummet and giving the men in their lives too much control, Dr. Carle gives sensible advice ("Ask for What You Need and Believe You Deserve It") along with "Gilda-Grams," pithy summarizations of her wisdom (as in "Forget the 12-Step programs. Women in pain need only two steps: Get up. Get out."). After a thorough discussion of how to develop a better self-image, thus finding a healthier mate, the author advises how to keep your relationship going, not by using games, but by projecting a stronger you. --Jenny Brown --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.

From Library Journal

These tapes address the dating and relationship concerns of women. While the Hilts book provides a focused overview for most of the issues likely to cause anxiety, the Carle tape takes a much more scattershot approach and, unfortunately, is a much weaker product. Carle advocates, as does Hilts, the need to know and stand by one's own values. However, her suggestions on how to do so are buried in a plethora of male bashing, unfocused and poorly explained exercises, and "tips" that often seem manipulative rather than true lifestyle suggestions. There is excellent material here, but one must mine for it. The Inner Bitch, as read by Alyssa Bresnahan, provides a humorous and practical approach to the dating/relationship scene. Hilts advises slowing down, paying close attention to your thoughts, and waiting rather than rushing into old, unsuccessful behaviors. She also addresses such touchy issues as birth control, sex as recreation, and family holidays. Both tapes take the view that consenting adults can decide what is right for them. The Inner Bitch is highly recommended to public libraries that serve people who date or seek successful relationships. Don't Bet on the Prince! is not recommended.AKathleen Sullivan, Phoenix P.L.
Copyright 1999 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Audio Cassette edition.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 264 pages
• Publisher: Golden Books (January 15, 1999)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 1582380244
• ISBN-13: 978-1582380247
• Product Dimensions: 8.7 x 5.7 x 0.8 inches
• Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (6 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,152,473 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

27 of 30 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Even for already-marrieds like me - tons of great advice!, May 3, 1998

By 

"nightingaleny" - See all my reviews

This review is from: Don't Bet on the Prince!: How to Have the Man You Want by Betting on Yourself (Hardcover)

I really wondered what I could get from this book after 13 years of marriage to a great guy who is also the great father of my children. But let me tell you there is so much here! The self-assessments made me realize how much more criticizing than complimenting I was doing, how I was getting too busy to play, and most of all gave communication techniques. It's true that my husband was attracted to me for the power and self-confidence I had when we first met, but so much of it had waned over time. I'm looking forward to really working on myself so that I can add that faceted sparkle to our relationship again. Thank you Dr. Gilda!

18 of 19 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Must Have for Confused Women, November 19, 2001

By 

DawnD (Staten Island, New York United States) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Don't Bet on the Prince! How To Have The Man You Want by Betting on Yourself (Paperback)

I received this book from my godmother in the middle of my break up with my fiance. I must say that this book helped me so much and I realized that I was in love with the idea of getting married and not in love with the man I almost did marry. This book has soo much good advice in it for woman who are either married or single. Don't take my advice, buy it and you will love it too.

20 of 25 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Repairing and Mending The Broken Hearted!, January 27, 2001

By A Customer

This review is from: Don't Bet on the Prince! How To Have The Man You Want by Betting on Yourself (Paperback)

Just wanted to say...I have recently purchased, and am in the process of reading the book entitled "Don't Bet On The Prince" by Dr. Gilda Carle..I must say, this is one of the refreshing and enlightening books I have read in a long time...It's timely message has helped me more than I can begin to say... Dr.Gilda has answered so many questions that I have had in my heart for so very long..It is teaching me about myself and the mechanics of the female heart! The book is written from Dr. Gilda's heart to all the broken hearted and disillusioned women of our time... Surely a masterpiece that stands alone in its class! I applaud Dr. Gilda for her frankness and boldness to share and explain the complex issues of the human heart..Her motive is clear... to help the hurting and get them back on the road to recovery! I highly recommend this wonderful book to all women that are confused, disoriented, used, abused, mistreated, etc.. Get it at all costs, read it. and get back your dignity, self-confidence, pride and self-worth ! Women were created to be loved, treated tenderly and not abused! Dr. Gilda, your book is truly an answer to prayer...May you be blessed beyond measure for all the good that you do with a pure heart for all the hurting women of our time ! Love to Dr. Gilda, and to all who read this review !