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Don't Put Me In, Coach: My Incredible NCAA Journey from the End of the Bench to the End of the Bench Kindle Edition

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Length: 282 pages Word Wise: Enabled Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
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Editorial Reviews


"Mark Titus knows a lot of personal secrets of mine. If he revealed any of them in this book, I will kick him right in the testicles. I’m not joking."
            -Greg Oden (#1 overall pick in 2007 NBA Draft, 2007 1st Team All-American)

 “Of all the players I’ve coached in my career, Mark Titus is one of them.”
            -Thad Matta (head basketball coach at Ohio State)

“You want me to give you a quote?  I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.  You’ve been riding my coattails for years, so of course you want to put my name on your book to sell more copies.”
            -Evan Turner (#2 overall pick in 2010 NBA Draft, 2010 college basketball National Player of The Year)

“I haven’t read this book and probably never will, but the cover looks pretty cool I guess.”
            -Mike Conley Jr. (#4 overall pick in 2007 NBA Draft, 2007 NCAA Tournament South Regional MVP) 
"If Mark Titus had been able to play basketball the way he can write, he would have joined his Ohio State team mates in the NBA. No kidding. This is nothing less than a modern-day basketball version of Ball Four, a terrific look behind the locker room door, funny and profane and real. Great stuff."
            -Leigh Montville, New York Times bestselling author of Ted Williams and Evel

            -Chicago Tribune

“As a good-humored book about what Titus calls ‘normal kids who do stupid things’ while playing big-time basketball, Don’t Put Me In, Coach should appeal not just to Buckeyes fans but also to anyone looking for a frank, humanizing peek in to the locker room....A funny read.”
            -Sports Illustrated

For a reminder of the fun that can be had in college sports, turn to Mark Titus...The book, a comic tale of coming to terms with failure, is littered with stories of pranks, jokes, and team hijinks that may turn around that understandably low opinion of college sports. Everybody seems to be having a great time.
“It’s not often we notice a college basketball player who, over his four year career, played a total of 48 minutes in 32 games while racking up just nine points. But when that player happens to be Mark Titus, a Brownsburg, Indiana native who parlayed his benchwarming days at Ohio State University into a blog with nearly 4 million views and a new book titled Don’t Put Me In, Coach, we make exceptions.” 
            -The Onion’s A.V. Club (Indianapolis)

Don’t Put Me In, Coach, [is] a scabrously funny look at what it’s like to almost play for a No. 1-ranked NCAA hoops team."
            -The Free Lance–Star (Fredericksburg, VA)

"The unique combination of snort-inducing hilarity and insider perspective makes this required reading for younger (or just perpetually immature) hoop heads. A perfect way to pass the time during the tournament’s endless TV timeouts."

"The Maxim demographic will revel in Titus’s rebellious tales, which come with a heaping portion of snarky, bro-friendly prose, scatological humor, and pop culture references….And under all the pranks and immaturity, Titus is a likable, forthright narrator.” 
            -Publishers Weekly

About the Author

MARK TITUS's blog,, has recorded over 3.6 million views since its debut in late 2008.  He has been featured in the New York Times,,, the Associated Press, and the Cleveland Plain Dealer. He has recently attempted to enter the NBA draft and tried out for the Harlem Globetrotters. Titus graduated from Ohio State in 2010, a hero to millions.

Product Details

  • File Size: 3170 KB
  • Print Length: 282 pages
  • Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0385535104
  • Publisher: Anchor (March 6, 2012)
  • Publication Date: March 6, 2012
  • Sold by: Random House LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B005O1BYI2
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #137,459 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

52 of 59 people found the following review helpful By Jennifer Juday VINE VOICE on March 4, 2012
Format: Hardcover Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
DON'T PUT ME IN, COACH is a surprisingly engaging read. I should start by noting that I am not in any of the obvious target audiences for this book. I am not an Ohio Buckeyes fan, or even an NCAA basketball fan. I am a suburban mom, and an alum of a school that celebrated engineering rather than athletics. I think I had heard the author's name, but could not have told you anything at all about him. And yet, I read this book in just a couple of days. I was initially repelled, but found myself pulled in to the story, meandering, pointless and off-color though it is.

Just to be clear -- DON'T PUT ME IN, COACH, were it a film, would be rated R for "pervasive language" and some sexual content. You likely do not want to buy this book as a gift for the evangelicals on your holiday list.

I don't usually go for that kind of thing, but Titus really can write. DON'T PUT ME IN, COACH is organized around his basketball career from 7th grade or so through his senior year at Ohio State, ending with his brief stint as a Harlem Globetrotter recruit. Since the book cover talks about his career being "from the end of the bench to the end of the bench," you already know how the story goes for him. And you immediately gather that this won't turn about to be a riff on Rudy. Instead you find yourself reading about fistfights and poop accidents among the athletic elite, from someone who clearly loves basketball and who has a talent for 18-34 year old guy in a locker room humor.

Titus never takes himself too seriously. Early on, he comments that he is "one of the most famous walk-ons of all time (which let's be honest, is like being the smartest Kardashian)." If that makes you laugh (I admit it, I did), then you'll likely find yourself pulled along for this lightweight, enjoyable ride.
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16 of 18 people found the following review helpful By Calliope on March 19, 2012
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
It was interesting this book came out after the SI expose into a blue-blood dysfunctional UCLA program. After reading the SI, I was naively shocked at the issues that were discussed in the article. After reading Mark's book, perspective arrived--every NCAA BB coach has come head-to-head with: 1) team chemistry issues, 2) top star feeling entitled to be a flocker, and 3) team discipline issues based on behavior as well as being college students. Some of the same issues came across in both programs (UCLA, OSU), but "Don't Put Me in Coach" gave a more comical, balanced, and entertaining look at college basketball. I read it during all the TV timeouts during March Madness and laughed out loud enough times that I started to get strange looks from my fellow fans. I could have done with less bathroom humor, but other than that I think it gave a locker-look at how college basketball team's function.
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13 of 15 people found the following review helpful By KarenMills on August 18, 2012
Format: Hardcover
I randomly picked up this book at the library. I am a forty three year old woman who knows nothing about basketball and has not been to an organized sports event since High School. However, I found this to be one of the funniest books I have read in a long time.
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7 of 8 people found the following review helpful By Agong on October 6, 2012
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
Great insight and funny writing from Titus. An extension from his blog. Exactly what I hoped for and was expecting.
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3 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Off Duty Paul on August 29, 2013
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
First started reading Mark Titus last year as a contributor to the sports blog website Grantland and decided to order this book. I have to say I was impressed. While not a Buckeye, I did attend a big state school that is crazy about basketball, (and has actually had a fair amount of success against the Buckeyes lately, Rock Chalk!) so I was eager to get the insider's perspective on college basketball.

While I have seen some of the reviews state that this book can be fun for people outside of the target demographic, I wanted to add that if you ARE in the target demographic, then you will REALLY love this book. I happen to be the same age as Titus, and attended college during the same timespan, so all of the basketball moments are fresh in my mind and pretty much all of his jokes and cultural references struck me as things my friends and I would joke about. While there is a lot about this book that is universally funny, some of his references and admittedly immature style might alienate some of the "outside demographic readers" but if you happen to also be a 25 year old male who thinks that poop jokes are still funny you will be rolling.

This is a quick read, and I was surprised at how well his blog-style format translated to the longer form, weaving anecdotes and reflections throughout a clear throughline story. Also, it is rare that a book pushes me to audible laughter, but this book left in me fits of childish giggles multiple times.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful By Neal Reynolds VINE VOICE on April 30, 2012
Format: Hardcover Vine Customer Review of Free Product ( What's this? )
As a general rule, I am not a fan of off-color humor. However, I admit that Mark Titus has such a natural, unforced though raucous sense of humor, I couldn't help laughing through the book.

Most hilarious to me is the exaltation of "uselessness", of i.e. playing up to four minutes in a basketball game without making a statistic, either positive or negative. He does stress the importance that failure to make a statistic must not be must be trying to make some kind of mark and fail in order to take pride in being useless.

I also enjoyed the way he employs racial humor without being racist. One section expecially where he's actually asked to use the n word by an African-American is especially fun.

Although humor is Mark Titus' strong point, he also does quite well in those sections where he is describing the action in a basketball game.

So I do recommend this, especially to sports fans, although I do caution those sensitive to bathroom humor.
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