Don't Put Me In, Coach: My Incredible NCAA Journey from the End of the Bench to the End of the Bench [Hardcover]

Mark Titus (Author)

Book Description

Release date: March 6, 2012

An irreverent, hilarious insider's look at big-time NCAA basketball, through the eyes of the nation's most famous benchwarmer and author of the popular blog ClubTrillion.com (3.6m visits!). Mark Titus holds the Ohio State record for career wins, and made it to the 2007 national championship game. You would think Titus would be all over the highlight reels. You'd be wrong.
 
In 2006, Mark Titus arrived on Ohio State's campus as a former high school basketball player who aspired to be an orthopedic surgeon. Somehow, he was added to the elite Buckeye basketball team, given a scholarship, and played alongside seven future NBA players on his way to setting the record for most individual career wins in Ohio State history. Think that's impressive? In four years, he scored a grand total of nine—yes, nine—points.

This book will give readers an uncensored and uproarious look inside an elite NCAA basketball program from Titus's unique perspective. In his four years at the end of the bench, Mark founded his wildly popular blog Club Trillion, became a hero to all guys picked last, and even got scouted by the Harlem Globetrotters. Mark Titus is not your average basketball star. This is a wild and completely true story of the most unlikely career in college basketball. A must-read for all fans of March Madness and college sports!

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Mark Titus knows a lot of personal secrets of mine. If he revealed any of them in this book, I will kick him right in the testicles. I’m not joking."
            -Greg Oden (#1 overall pick in 2007 NBA Draft, 2007 1st Team All-American)

 “Of all the players I’ve coached in my career, Mark Titus is one of them.”
            -Thad Matta (head basketball coach at Ohio State)

“You want me to give you a quote?  I guess I shouldn’t be surprised.  You’ve been riding my coattails for years, so of course you want to put my name on your book to sell more copies.”
            -Evan Turner (#2 overall pick in 2010 NBA Draft, 2010 college basketball National Player of The Year)

“I haven’t read this book and probably never will, but the cover looks pretty cool I guess.”
            -Mike Conley Jr. (#4 overall pick in 2007 NBA Draft, 2007 NCAA Tournament South Regional MVP) 
 
"If Mark Titus had been able to play basketball the way he can write, he would have joined his Ohio State team mates in the NBA. No kidding. This is nothing less than a modern-day basketball version of Ball Four, a terrific look behind the locker room door, funny and profane and real. Great stuff."
            -Leigh Montville, New York Times bestselling author of Ted Williams and Evel

"Hilarious."
            -Chicago Tribune

“As a good-humored book about what Titus calls ‘normal kids who do stupid things’ while playing big-time basketball, Don’t Put Me In, Coach should appeal not just to Buckeyes fans but also to anyone looking for a frank, humanizing peek in to the locker room....A funny read.”
            -Sports Illustrated

“For a reminder of the fun that can be had in college sports, turn to Mark Titus...The book, a comic tale of coming to terms with failure, is littered with stories of pranks, jokes, and team hijinks that may turn around that understandably low opinion of college sports. Everybody seems to be having a great time.”
            -TheAtlantic.com
 
“It’s not often we notice a college basketball player who, over his four year career, played a total of 48 minutes in 32 games while racking up just nine points. But when that player happens to be Mark Titus, a Brownsburg, Indiana native who parlayed his benchwarming days at Ohio State University into a blog with nearly 4 million views and a new book titled Don’t Put Me In, Coach, we make exceptions.” 
            -The Onion’s A.V. Club (Indianapolis)

“Don’t Put Me In, Coach, [is] a scabrously funny look at what it’s like to almost play for a No. 1-ranked NCAA hoops team."
            -The Free Lance–Star (Fredericksburg, VA)

"The unique combination of snort-inducing hilarity and insider perspective makes this required reading for younger (or just perpetually immature) hoop heads. A perfect way to pass the time during the tournament’s endless TV timeouts."
            -Kirkus

"The Maxim demographic will revel in Titus’s rebellious tales, which come with a heaping portion of snarky, bro-friendly prose, scatological humor, and pop culture references….And under all the pranks and immaturity, Titus is a likable, forthright narrator.” 
            -Publishers Weekly

About the Author

MARK TITUS's blog, http://clubtrillion.blogspot.com, has recorded over 3.6 million views since its debut in late 2008.  He has been featured in the New York Times, ESPN.com, Yahoo.com, the Associated Press, and the Cleveland Plain Dealer. He has recently attempted to enter the NBA draft and tried out for the Harlem Globetrotters. Titus graduated from Ohio State in 2010, a hero to millions.

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Hardcover: 272 pages
• Publisher: Doubleday; First edition (March 6, 2012)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0385535104
• ISBN-13: 978-0385535106
• Product Dimensions: 6.4 x 1 x 9.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (129 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #181,778 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #57 in Books > Humor & Entertainment > Humor > Sports

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Most Helpful Customer Reviews

39 of 44 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Surprisingly Engaging! March 4, 2012

By Jennifer Juday VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

DON'T PUT ME IN, COACH is a surprisingly engaging read. I should start by noting that I am not in any of the obvious target audiences for this book. I am not an Ohio Buckeyes fan, or even an NCAA basketball fan. I am a suburban mom, and an alum of a school that celebrated engineering rather than athletics. I think I had heard the author's name, but could not have told you anything at all about him. And yet, I read this book in just a couple of days. I was initially repelled, but found myself pulled in to the story, meandering, pointless and off-color though it is.

Just to be clear -- DON'T PUT ME IN, COACH, were it a film, would be rated R for "pervasive language" and some sexual content. You likely do not want to buy this book as a gift for the evangelicals on your holiday list.

I don't usually go for that kind of thing, but Titus really can write. DON'T PUT ME IN, COACH is organized around his basketball career from 7th grade or so through his senior year at Ohio State, ending with his brief stint as a Harlem Globetrotter recruit. Since the book cover talks about his career being "from the end of the bench to the end of the bench," you already know how the story goes for him. And you immediately gather that this won't turn about to be a riff on Rudy. Instead you find yourself reading about fistfights and poop accidents among the athletic elite, from someone who clearly loves basketball and who has a talent for 18-34 year old guy in a locker room humor.

Titus never takes himself too seriously. Early on, he comments that he is "one of the most famous walk-ons of all time (which let's be honest, is like being the smartest Kardashian)." If that makes you laugh (I admit it, I did), then you'll likely find yourself pulled along for this lightweight, enjoyable ride.

11 of 12 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars A Cinderella Story March 19, 2012

By Calliope

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase

It was interesting this book came out after the SI expose into a blue-blood dysfunctional UCLA program. After reading the SI, I was naively shocked at the issues that were discussed in the article. After reading Mark's book, perspective arrived--every NCAA BB coach has come head-to-head with: 1) team chemistry issues, 2) top star feeling entitled to be a flocker, and 3) team discipline issues based on behavior as well as being college students. Some of the same issues came across in both programs (UCLA, OSU), but "Don't Put Me in Coach" gave a more comical, balanced, and entertaining look at college basketball. I read it during all the TV timeouts during March Madness and laughed out loud enough times that I started to get strange looks from my fellow fans. I could have done with less bathroom humor, but other than that I think it gave a locker-look at how college basketball team's function.

7 of 7 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious August 18, 2012

By KarenMills

Format:Hardcover

I randomly picked up this book at the library. I am a forty three year old woman who knows nothing about basketball and has not been to an organized sports event since High School. However, I found this to be one of the funniest books I have read in a long time.

10 of 12 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Fun and games March 6, 2012

By JoLynn

Format:Hardcover

I'm pretty sure I'm not the target audience for this book. I had never heard of Mark Titus, I'm not a male aged 18-30, and I'm not an Ohio State alum. However, I am a college basketball fan, and despite a lot (a lot!) of bathroom humor, I really enjoyed Mark's story of his college basketball career at Ohio State.

An easy read, filled with just the right mix of snarky humor and basketball play calling. Interesting inside look at a big time college basketball program. If you are one of the target audiences mentioned above, you'll enjoy it. Might even be a good choice for a mature teen who is a reluctant reader.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious. October 6, 2012

By Agong

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

Great insight and funny writing from Titus. An extension from his blog. Exactly what I hoped for and was expecting.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing July 7, 2012

By DUSTINZB

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Verified Purchase

Definitely a must read. Had me laughing from beginning to end. Only for the true basketball fan Mark TheShark Titus will and should have more books after this onbe.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Good, Irreverent, Sports Fun April 26, 2012

By Coopernm

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

This book is certainly not for everyone, but anyone with an interest in the inner-workings of college (specifically Big Ten) basketball, candid insight on several well-known public figures of the basketball world, or hilarious imagery would love it. Its a very fun, very quick read.

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

4.0 out of 5 stars Sit down coach. You're blocking my view of the cheerleaders. March 11, 2012

By mateo52 VINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover|Amazon Vine™ Review (What's this?)

By a landslide, the best sports book I've read in years and as I'm sure Titus would appreciate if he happened across this review, the only sports book I've read in years. But, the reality is he had me at the title. Puerile, scatological arguably snarky humor aside, if the reader has at least a passing interest in college sports and the interplay of the locker room it is worth a look.

In his blog Titus freely acknowledges his target audience is comprised of 18-34 yr. old males. While I passed that demographic longer ago then I want to think about I have to freely admit there were numerable asides and quips that brought a smirk to my face and a smattering where I couldn't help but to laugh aloud. This "tome," gratuitous as that description may be, has the potential to enlighten anyone with only cursory or conventional perceptions of college athletics and to an extent, the less visible aspects of youth sports in general. The Rudys of the world bring a romanticism not borne out by the hard facts, like the harsh reality major division I programs invite talented players who don't necessarily measure up to the prime recruits to walk-on. The kid with the basketball dream may be allowed to serve as summer session cannon fodder but when the warm-ups are handed out he is nearly guaranteed to be handing them out as a team manager rather than admiring the embroidery of his name on the back. You don't get scholarship offers without having become a known commodity and that process happens via participation on the AAU traveling squads and summer camps, not as a result of high school interscholastic heroism....

What comes across, eventually, is Mark Titus' gift is his willingness and ability to document his experiences as the low man on the totem pole and ironically befit the true nature of the totem as his role was never as inconsequential as conventional wisdom may profess. Sure, the mere thought of a 12th man lobbying not to play is for me analogous to someone refusing to get a broken arm set because the disability claim was about to be approved. There was a time when the end of the bench player took pride in being a point- a-minute man, Titus has popularized a totally contradictory paradigm with the concept of Club Trillion, or play hard and have absolutely no discernible impact.

'Don't Put Me In' is a quick fun read for anyone who has ever played or wanted to play competitive sports in a team atmosphere, but it's no "Ball Four." Everyone knows a walk contributes to OBP. Read more ›