Customer Reviews

I Don't Want To Be Crazy (Push)

5 star:		(9)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(0)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

Reading this book is almost like reading somebody else's diary. Samantha Schutz is open and honest with the most intimate details of her life during a nightmarish four year period from the end of high school through college graduation.

All the uncertainty of her life is here - leaving the familiarity of home for the first time, her relationships with guys, with her parents, with other girls, and with herself. And through it all a psychological disorder is slowly creeping into her life, undiagnosed at first, then openly destructive, and finally raging out of control. Samantha Schutz struggles between suicidal tendencies and efforts to beat the disorder. The therapy and drugs become a whole separate battlefield where she sometimes wins, often loses, and in some cases ends up worse off than she was before.

Reading the author's account of her journey is sometimes painful, and it was hard for me not to skip to the end to find out how her story ends. I Don't Want to be Crazy would be a compelling drama if it were fiction; the fact that is a true account makes it all the more intense.

The events in this book are written in the form of free verse poetry. Those three words normally send me running for cover, but Samantha Schutz chose this format for a reason. She conveys images and emotions with an intensity that the wordiness of prose cannot deliver. The words are few and carefully chosen, and their emotional impact is much greater because of it. This is free verse poetry written by a poet, and through it she accomplishes beautifully what she set out to do.

According to the book's postscript, anxiety disorders affect more than one in ten children and adolescents in America. Whether you realize it or not, chances are you might already know somebody who lives with an anxiety disorder. I Don't Want to be Crazy gives an inside look at the way they may be experiencing events that for us are merely an unremarkable part of our day. The clarity and candor of this book provide a valuable understanding for those of us who are looking in from the outside. And for anyone who recognizes themselves in these pages, it offers hope for coming to terms with the disorder and carving out a normal life despite the persistent looming threat of another anxiety attack.

I recommend this book to anyone in high school or older, but teens, young adults, and parents of teenagers will find it especially pertinent. And if you do know someone who has an anxiety disorder, you absolutely must read this book immediately!

Samantha herself gave me a copy of this book, and I cannot tell you what a true gift it was. As a woman who has struggled with my own anxiety disorder for almost 10 years, the honesty and reality of her story moved me often to the point of tears. Everyone who feels alone with their anxiety, or who knows someone who suffers from an anxiety disorder, should read this book, if only to know that THEY ARE NOT ALONE. Knowing Samantha and seeing firsthand what a lovely, sane, compassionate, accomplished woman she has become, in spite of her disorder, makes her book all the more powerful for me, because it shows me that there is hope! I recommend this book to anyone!

Samantha Schutz's I DON'T WANT TO BE CRAZY tells of Samantha, who leaves home for college filled with expectations and excitement. As she revels in change, new pressures evolve and she begins to suffer anxiety attacks that threaten her newfound independence. Few stories are written to explore older teens leaving home and the pressures they face: I DON'T WANT TO BE CRAZY is an excellent commentary on pitfalls and stress.

When Samantha Schutz first left home for college, she was excited by the possibilities-freedom from parents, freedom from a boyfriend, freedom from the person she was supposed to be. At first, she reveled in the independence-but as the pressures increased, she began to suffer anxiety attacks that would leave her mentally shaken and incapacitated.

This is a very honest portrayal of someone suffering from an anxiety disorder. This story brought back memories of my own attacks when I went away to college. And just like the author shows, each episode is scary and you do start questioning your own sanity.

The free verse style of writing makes the story even more real. The reader can't help but feel for Samantha as she goes through an episode, her experiences with meds, therapists, and how she comes to grips with not only her illness but her own sanity.

I highly recommend this book.

I gave this book as a present to a few girls in my family. Everyone in my family loved the book and now Samantha Schutz is one of our favorite authors. Thank you for a wonderful book.

Samantha Schutz's book, 'I don't want to be crazy' is an amazing and vivid portrayel of a young woman's struggle with panic/anxiety disorder. I am positive this book will help many young women who are experiencing similar struggle. Further, I would recommend this book to anyone who is looking for a fascinating and impressive read! A wonderful first book for this author; I look forward to more publications.

As if college is not stressful enough, Samantha is dealing with an anxiety disorder that can, at times, be crippling. Dealing with family pressure, relationships with friends and boyfriends, and her classwork all can overwhelm her at times. Therapy and medication help, but it is a constant struggle, which she finds out during a trip abroad.

As someone who also began to suffer from anxiety during young adulthood, I found this book so incredibly touching. Samantha's depiction of the isolation caused by depression was spot on. My heart ached for this young woman, and she opened her soul to the readers. I think the struggles she has are common themes to many teens and young adults, but ones that are rarely talked about so honestly. Yes, many books talk about the pressure of school, sex, drinking and drugs, and parents, but few couple those pressures with the constant presence of mental illness, and fewer still do it as honestly and adeptly as this book.

I am a big fan of books being written in verse form, so this was right up my alley. While not quite as impactful as other verse writers, like Ellen Hopkins, I think that this book's intensity comes from the fact that the verse is not merely telling a story, it is telling a true story. This is Samantha baring her soul for all the world to see; in that I find such strength and beauty.

The book was short. I'm pretty sure I finished it within a day or two. Once I started reading it, I didn't want to put it down. It is what I have come to expect from PUSH books. The realism the author uses to describe simplistic events make the book easy to relate to. I gave this to my younger sister in college and she enjoyed it as well.

Millions of people suffer from anxiety disorder (panic attacks) on a daily basis. Most suffer needlessly, either due to lack of medical treatment, misdiagnosis, or ignorance of the condition. I DON'T WANT TO BE CRAZY is one woman's brave confession of her struggles with the debilitating disorder.

Samantha Schutz was first diagnosed with anxiety disorder at age seventeen, after years of suffering with the problem. She uses this memoir to describe the devastating effects of the condition on her life and her relationships. The book chronicles the ups and downs of Samantha's life from age seventeen until she graduates from college and gets her first job in the publishing industry.

Told in verse, the story reveals everything from the gripping terror of the attacks to the many therapists she consulted for help. Samantha titles her entries with the current drugs (Klonopin, Serzone, Xanax, Paxil, etc.) and the dosages she was prescribed to treat her condition. She also explains her attempts to stop the medications, and her belief that things would get better, only to relapse with increasing frequency.

Samantha's honesty is evident throughout. She doesn't promise miracle cures, and she truly marvels at the support she received from her family and most of her friends. This is an inspiring book for anyone living with or connected to someone living with anxiety disorder.

Reviewed by: Sally Kruger, aka "Readingjunky"

This is a memoir written in verse form. Go back to your teen and college years, to that time when you were out on your own, exploring the world and entering new relationships. Everything is scary and exciting as one breaks ties with family. But during the author's attempt to blend into the real world, she continuously walked into a wall of panic. Anxiety attacks, fainting spells, and moments of doubt and insecurity plagued Schutz during her young adult years. This true life book about mental illness was intense. I'll most likely read it again.