Customer Reviews

Double Team

5 star:		(13)
4 star:		(10)
3 star:		(12)
2 star:		(7)
1 star:		(14)

 

 

Ok no, not really. This movie really sucks. It's terrible in pretty much everyway - but that's what makes it so good. It's so bad, and everything in it is so ridiculous, that it's a hoot. Over the years I gotten together with old friends and we watch it for some laughs. From Rodman's throwing guys up in the air like a basketball to Van Damme's classic 20 foot slide after he's tripped by Rourke, Double Team is a must see!

The Jean Claude Van Damme Review Matrix (JCVD-RM)

1. Who is he? Jack Quinn, anti-terrorism expert
2. Which family member/friend must be avenged? His kidnapped wife, his unborn son
3. Does he take his shirt off? His opening scene is straight out of the shower, and into the swimming pool
4. Does he have sex with a C-List actress? How do you think his wife got pregnant?
5. Is there a tournament? No, but Dennis Rodman thinks there is
6. Is training needed for this tournament? No, but Dennis Rodman should have taken some acting classes beforehand
7. Does he do the splits in training or in the tournament? Constantly. This might be the most splitastic of all his movies.
8. Does he punch someone in the balls? As if JCVD was attempting to sabotage this movie, he leaves out one of his classic moves.
9. Does he do a series of flying or 360 kicks? So much so that in a deleted scene he gets dizzy and pukes
10. Is his enemy unbeatable? For the role, Mickey Rourke looks buff, not tough
11. Does he overcome an injury or other hindrance? Just Rodman's acting
12. Does he win? As lamely as possible

Coaxed out of retirement to capture his arch-nemesis Stavros (Rourke), it's up to Quinn to ensure he is prepared with the latest weaponry. Quinn makes his way to the local source of all sexual and social deviation in Antwerp. Bikers, hippies, extreme tattoo artists and piercing specialists, trannies, hookers, body modification oddities, freaks and geeks. Naturally, he'd run into Yaz (Dennis Rodman) in a place like this. And, of course, Rodman is an exotic arms dealer, an extraterrestrial version of James Bond's trusty Q.

Now supplied with a weapon that can, "shoot the d*@k off a hummingbird", Quinn sets up Stavros in the first ever carnival sting. When the plan goes awry - not to mention the best fight ever in a hospital nursery - Quinn is sent to The Colony, a top secret, pseudo-retirement home for special agents who still monitor world events.

Ironically directed by Tsui Hard, the reason this film fails is that it tries too hard. Some nice slow-motion, Matrix-esque bullet dodging scenes, and the JCVD kicks are always classic, but there's just too much to truly enjoy. From an ATV in southern France to plutonium stolen in Croatia, from a plane shot down by the North Koreans, and on to Rome, Antwerp, etc...it's pointless for the film's progression, as if the director simply wanted to collect frequent flyer mileage. The dialogue between JCVD and Rodman is atrocious. Delivered in a completely unpleasant hiccup staccato style, it's difficult to ascertain who speaks worse English. Made worse by the insistence of inserting basketball jargon into every possible sentence, it's simply painful. And I'll only briefly mention the pathetic attempts to insert the burgeoning internet into the mix, the fact that JCVD kicks a tiger, and the insulting Coca Cola product placement at the end.

I recommend this for only the JCVD zealot.

Jean Claude is certainly great in the fighting scenes as he is in most of his movies....Rodman is a joke....he has no acting ability whatsoever. This movie is thrown together with a lose story. The story seems to fill in the gaps inbetween the action scenes of which their are many. To me, this movie does not flow well, although the action scenes are good....it would have helped to have some strong supporting actors and a better story. Some of the scenes in this movie are totally ridiculous. Bottomline this movie is worse than most of Van Damme's other action movies....this one wasn't worth the film it was recorded on. I highly recommend skipping this one! You will be glad that you did.

A group of drunken, coke-obsessed urangutangs would have made a better cast then these phelonious hams. My unborn child has felt the pain that this movie inflicted on humanity as a whole. I would rather see my family brutally tortured then hit by 2 oncoming trains simulataneously whilst being molested by Moroccan circus freaks then watch this film. Special not to the creators: I hope you lose your eye-sight in a freak mountain climbing accident involving a billy-goat and a snail...you would think this is the end of the review...but oh no...we've only just begun. You will pay dearly for this crime against humanity. You and only you are to blame for all that is wrong and evil in this world. I wanted to beat Jean Claud Van Damme with a stale baguette and throw Dennis Rodman's limp,lifeless body against a wall then through a flaming basketball hoop when I saw this movie. The meteor in Armageddon made me feel better then watching these two proverbial "actors" walk aimlessly through this maniacal tyrade of a film...OK...I'm done.

this movie is the consequence of matrices of impossiblities all occuring at the same time! can anyone say: basketball parachutes?, monks with catacombs made of human bones (which is secretly a labratory) and the monks are watching pornography, where did that guy get a tiger from, why try to sufficate someone underwater with a plastic bag, why was van Damme squatting a bathtub, why does Dennis Rodman carry plastic explosives a detonator and a coin Smoke bomb in his pocket at all times, where did Dennis get a dirt bike, why did Dennis take his shirt off after killing that guy, why did Dennis hide the baby? why doesnt hIS care for the babies mom?. . . . . . the main question is why was this movie created?

This Van Damme thriller is such a mixed bag that it's hard to know where to begin. The plot is truly a witches' brew of ideas apparently cobbled together from just about every action thriller I've seen in the past 20 years. That wouldn't be so bad, except that the original movies did it better and this movie suffers by comparison. The script isn't terrible, but it's far from stellar. The actors struggle valiantly to extract some inspiration and drama from it, and sometimes succeed. I note one reviewer says this movie is on his top 10 worst list, and if it weren't for the unintentionally funny parts like former pro-basketball star Dennis Rodman throwing bad guys through windows 10 feet high as if he were dunking a basketball I probably wouldn't have watched the whole thing. But Rodman as an exotic arms dealer and Mickey Rourke as the evil Euro-nasty are entertaining to watch, and Van Damme is impressive as usual with the martial arts stunts. But if there's anything else on the tube rated three stars or higher you might want to switch channels.

This movie has been regarded by many as one of the worst ever made. While I wouldn't venture to say it's that bad, I have to agree that it's not academy award material. Van Damme and Rodman have one thing in common and that is a lack of acting skills. I can't stress enough that the acting in this film actually makes it comical and more fun to watch. However I gave the movie three stars because it delivered the action like it was supposed to. If you are a Van Damme fan and like action, check it out. If not, stay away.

I saw this one in the theatres and it's definitely on my worst movies list. Bad acting is given and the action just plain [stunk]. The scene that added this stinker to my list though was when our hereos, Rodman and Van Damme take cover from a bomb explosion behind a PEPSI machine placed conveiniently in the Collesium ruins?. They survive the blast with PEPSI cans flying all over the place. PEPSI must have bankrolled this movie to allow such a shameful PRODUCT PLACEMENT. Mental note to self, If a bomb is about to go off, dive behind a pop machine, IT WILL SAVE YOUR LIFE. Yeah right.

Jean-Claude Van Damme isn't exactly known for his superb acting skills, and when NBA player Dennis Rodman enters the cast, one can safely assume that this movie will not be carrying home any accolades based on its actors' performance. Instead of talking about the plot first as reviews usually do, it's perhaps wiser to focus on the positive: the action. The fights in the movie--and there are a lot of them--are of Van Damme's past caliber. Rodman also pitches in now and then and throws a good punch or lashes out with a massive foot. The choreography is of course no match for the recent action hits like The Matrix and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, and is 'okay' at best. Rodman's character, a shady special arms dealer, does add some brightness with his 007-esque cadre of tech gadgets. Now, the plot. It's almost non-existent, and what little of it the movie has actually bogs it down. The idea of the island is not quite so platitudinous, but still looks lame. As the story goes on it quickly becomes trite and serves up one round of groans after another. Some of the parts are downright confusing, and those scenes should be replaced with more fights. One's time and energy exhausted in trying to digest the story would be much better spent in focusing on the punches and kicks. If you decide to watch this, it's probably not a bad idea to just tone down the volume. After all, there's really not much must-know information one can learn from the dialogues, as everyone already understands that whoever Van Damme and Rodman are kicking are the baddies. -Xiao Zhu

This is a great movie with the duo of Dennis Rodman and Van Damm. Anybody that doesn't like this movie must have no taste of action. This movie is filled with action and comedy. Rodman is himself just like always. Rodman and Van Damm make a great team.