Amazon.com: Customer Reviews: Each for the Other: Marriage as It's Meant to Be
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on November 9, 1999
This book builds a theology of marriage. A mutually self-sacrificing marriage is seen as a primary means of revealing God's grace to sinful humans.
The author argues that headship and submission do have meaning and validity, even in today's culture. His view is traditional in many ways, but the insights he draws out of the major Pauline passage in Ephesians 5 seem fresh and not at all chauvinistic.
The writing can at times seem a bit stiff and wordy, but this is a minor quibble. The book may still be recommended without hesitation. The depth of insight he brings to the scriptures is quite significant.
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on May 18, 1999
I was given this book a few months before my wedding, and I am very glad it was given to me. The author confronts an issue that is quite controversial these days from a strong, biblical viewpoint. He explains and gives many practical examples of how the marriage relationship is most fulfilling when both partners have their God-given roles in the proper perspective. He describes the principles behind biblical love and submission and makes clear that the two are equally important and necessary for a proper relationship. Since reading this book, I have been challenged and motivated to look at how I love my wife and to find new ways to put her before myself. I strongly suggest it for men or women who are married, will be married, or ever will be married.
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on May 7, 2007
I've been married nearly 17 years and have found this book has given me so much inspiration! I have read many marriage enrichment books but I have to say this is the tops! (Yes, I am a woman, and did NOT feel the least bit intimidated by what he said). I have been challenged to be more serving to my husband and my children, which in turn, is serving my God. It is also a challenge to the husband as well to nuture and nourish his wife and children and this will cause the wife to respond in a way that she wants to serve. I could go on and on and on. I picked up the book to read the back cover and before I knew it I was half way through the book! Other than the Bible, it's right at the top in my opinion.
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on February 9, 2011
My wife and I went through this book together during pre-marital counseling. Chapell has a lot of good things to say about the roles of a man and a woman in marriage, and ties it all together well by often referencing the fact that marriage should exhibit the relationship Christ has with the church. Where his book misses the mark, however, is in his discussion of "one-ness" in marriage. Making strong statements that single people are "not whole persons" until they're married, Chapell's writing is rife in these sections with somewhat troubling implications about human beings made in God's image - indeed, he even indicates that unmarried people are only "partial" images of God (and, I suppose, are only worthy of part of the respect one human being should show another, if one follows this to its logical conclusion).

This claim of Chapell's runs directly counter to sermons by John Piper as well as some of the thoughtful writings of Dr. Anthony Bradley as these men speak about the state of "singleness," and the opportunities in Christ that being unmarried can afford one. In fact, I'd say that these particular statements of Chapell's are rooted far more in early American culture and stigmas (see, for instance, deist Benjamin Franklin's quotes about single men being "but one half of a pair of scissors") rather than the Bible (which he doesn't reference with these statements) or doctrines historically held by faithful Christians.
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on August 6, 1999
For a covenant view of marriage, this is unsurpassed. Even better than the classics in this field-- Douglas Wilson *Reforming Marriage* and Mike Mason *The Mystery of Marriage.* I bought three copies this month.

The only thing nearly as helpful is Gary Thomas, The Sacred Marriage.
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on December 21, 2003
I just recently borrowed this one from a friend. Excellent book! I wish Chapell came out with this book earlier! I agree with the other reviews that he does a great job of clearing the air on the topic of submission and respect for women. Also he makes an excellent point on both spouses allowing each other to use their gifts to have a godly and "sucessful" marriage. It was good to see that he did have the same "12 step" approach that most marriage books have.
Also good is his chapters on authority of the government and parental authority.
This would be a great book for any couple, newly weds (even engaged) to older couples.
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on December 12, 2007
I use and would recommend "Each for the Other" for both pre-marital and marital counselling. Dr.Chapell approaches the subject matter from a biblical and pastoral perspective. He explains and contextualizes the biblical concepts of marriage with contemporary life situations. He clearly explains the healthy biblical relationships between headship/authority and submission which is misunderstood and misapplied in the Christian culture and detested by contemporary secular culture. Both errors have had damaging effects upon marriages and families. Chapell takes a wholistic approach by looking at "Each for the Other" in terms of what it means to be a husband, what it means to be a wife, what it means to be parents to children, what it means to be a married couple in society and what it means to be "Each for the Other" "until death do us part."
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on January 21, 2008
I'm not what you'd call emphatically religious but found this book a terrific guide for men caught between what they want and what is right for their marriage. If you're married, this book can help keep the peace, but only if you have an open mind and heart! If you plan to be married, this book can be a guide and conversation starter between you and your betrothed when discussing real life marriage issues. You don't have to agree with absolutely everything the book says to come away with information that can save, improve, or build up your marriage.
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on June 16, 2014
This book was good, very informative and very biblically sound, I thought (no scholar here, but one did recommend it to me as such). It was quite dry, though. Actually, I felt like it was a recap of some David Keller sermons we had listened to. I much preferred the sermons.

I am an extremely quick reader, and it took me a week to get through this (usually much thicker books I make time for in a few days tops). My fiance is much slower and it took him months to swallow the entire thing. Just as an indication.

But, as an engaged couple trying to get an idea of what biblical marriage looks like, and what marriage pitfalls to watch for. So far so good! Good book to have on hand to kinda refrence/catch-up on.
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on January 28, 2014
This book is great for anyone who has no understanding whatsoever of biblical servant leadership and submission. High schoolers, new Christians, or anyone who has been spiritually abused by a church or family would benefit from this book. I'm sincerely glad it was written for those people.

The author explains husbands should not do things such as forbid their wives from speaking in public. Before reading this book, it already went without saying for me that such behavior is unbiblical and unacceptable. But there *are* people who don't understand this.

I give this book 3 stars not because what the author is saying is false. He is speaking biblical truth. But this book speaks on such a basic level, it is (hopefully!) not relevant to most Christian couples.

If you already have a basic understanding of a husband and wife's roles in marriage, I would instead recommend starting with one of these Gospel-centered marriage books:
The Meaning of Marriage
Sacred Marriage
What Did You Expect?
When Sinners Say I Do
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