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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
The Long Conversation, July 16, 2009
The very words are exotic - think of the harem, the geisha, the Kama Sutra, all of them indicating the exoticism and eroticism of the East. The sexual culture of the orient (however that got to be defined) has for centuries captivated, first, Western explorers, and afterwards, Western imperialists and visitors. The erotic allure of the East for Western men is the subject of a grand history, _The East, The West, and Sex: A History of Erotic Encounters_ (Knopf) by Richard Bernstein. The author has been a foreign correspondent serving in Asia, and himself has a wife named Zhongmei Li, whom he appreciatively calls "my vision of the East". The topic, then, is close to his heart, and his book is a spectacular history of peculiarities of culture. There is some titillation here, descriptions of acts and accessibilities that cannot help but be curious and arousing, but the historical anecdotes are wonderful illustrations of general human behavior, besides often being amusing. Bernstein has described things as they have been and how things are are, with only an admirably small amount of wondering how they _ought_ to be, and certainly without any prudishness.
They do sex differently "over there". This is a constant theme within Bernstein's book, and the source of the special erotic fascination men have for North and East Africa and Asia. The West had a generally Christian morality, promoting monogamy and often stressing the sinfulness of sexual fun even within marriage. In many Eastern cultures, sex was not tightly linked to love or sin. It was often assumed that men, especially powerful men, naturally would enjoy sexual favors from many women, and that desires were to be satisfied, possibly by a particular class of women. Trained sexual masseurs, courtesans, harem girls, and legal prostitutes all come under Bernstein's broad definition of harem culture. The pattern has continued to modern times. Lt. Col. John Paul Vann was an advisor to the South Vietnamese Army in the 1960s. He had a wife in the States, two girlfriends in separate households in Saigon, and countless bar girls now and then. American servicemen didn't usually have his resources, but all of them knew places to get serviced. Many Vietnam veterans are involved in what Bernstein calls "the latest phase of the long erotic adventure of the West into the East," living in Thailand for warm weather, cheap living, good food, the companionship of fellow vets (they even have official Veterans of Foreign Wars chapters), and of course the accessible women. "Do the arithmetic," one of the vets tells us. "She's 51 years younger than me. Do you think I could have somebody like her in Pennsylvania?"
Bernstein is scrupulous in his understanding that a degree of sexual oppression comes from invading forces, whether commercial or military. He cannot escape that his subject matter forces him to write about powerful and eager males and compliant, often commercial females, so the subject is rife with political incorrectness. Even so, there is a practical give and take to both sides. The Thai bar-girl slang for a foreign man translates to "a walking ATM". There is a story that is not unusual about a bar girl who got her besotted Austrian client to marry her and build her a house. In Thailand, land and houses can only be owned by Thai citizens, so when she moved into the house with her real boyfriend and sought an end to the marriage, he had no claim on the goods. It isn't all greed; most of the girls use their earnings to help poorer members of their families. There might be religious judgments to be made upon the girls or their clients, but it is a clear commercial transaction. The clients should take care not to confuse compliance and service with love, but at the same time foreigners ought to reject notions that these particular women are merely sex slaves. There is no dispute that the money is beneficial; a member of the Thai legislature says, "Which is better as foreign assistance, foreign assistance through sex, or foreign assistance through the government that never gets to the people anyway?" Kipling knew that East was East, and West was West; neither has a monopoly on the "right" way to handle sexual matters. But with all due respect to Kipling, the two do meet, through the centuries and through intimate sensualities. Bernstein's book is an detailed look at the long sexual conversation between two different worlds.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Mr. Berstein is a man you'd like to dine with, July 6, 2009
A fascinating book that kept me engrossed. I wish the author would have elaborated on how Asian harem culture influenced how Asian cultures warred within their own realm... for example, the atrocious sexual crimes practiced by the Japanese during their repeated attempts to conquer China (i.e. Nanking). Of course, this is a personal desire that should not detract from such an excellent book. Conversational in tone, impressive in historical scope, and stunningly easy to read. The author comes across as authoratitive and likable.
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5 of 7 people found the following review helpful:
1.0 out of 5 stars
The Title is Better than the Book, August 9, 2009
THIS BOOK TOOK ABOUT 300 PAGES TO TELL US WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW.LETS SEE ; Westerners during the age of discovery found the East was more open to sex then the Victorians;the East had Harems and cheap ,casual sex for rich and powerful Western guys who acted like kids in a candy store. GOSH -- what a revelation. Only it can be stated in one paragraph. Didn't need a whole book to explore that dynamic.
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