Eighth Grade Bites (Chronicles of Vladimir Tod, Book 1) [Paperback]

Heather Brewer (Author)

Book Description

Release date: March 13, 2008

Vlad has to keep his vampire urges under control while dealing with the pressures of middle school.

Thirteen-year-old Vladimir Tod really hates junior high. Bullies harass him, the principal is dogging him, and the girl he likes prefers his best friend. Oh, and Vlad has a secret: His mother was human, but his father was a vampire. With no idea of the extent of his powers, Vlad struggles daily with his blood cravings and his enlarged fangs. When a substitute teacher begins to question him a little too closely, Vlad worries that his cover is about to be blown. But then he faces a much bigger problem: He’s being hunted by a vampire killer.

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Editorial Reviews

From School Library Journal

Grade 5–8—Vladimir Tod's is a vampire-or at least sort of; he's not quite sure. His father was a vampire, but his mother was human, and they died three years ago in a mysterious accident. Now Vlad has only his friend Henry and his "Aunt" Nelly, his mother's best friend who is raising him, to confide in. He has a hunger for blood, although he's been trained since babyhood to be "normal" and not to act on it. He gets by because Nelly, who's a nurse, brings home bags of blood from the hospital where she works, and he hides one or two in his backpack for when he gets hungry. But Vlad realizes that his father had a history he didn't know about when his English teacher vanishes mysteriously, to be replaced by a tall, thin substitute teacher in a purple top hat who seems to know a little too much about him. This story comes with all the usual eighth-grade angst, and none of the characters is particularly gripping. While some vampire fans will enjoy it, others will find the way that Brewer plays fast and loose with the standard vampire lore hard to swallow. Eighth Grade Bites reads like the novelization of an unexceptional made-for-TV movie.—Walter Minkel, New York Public Library
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.

About the Author

Heather Brewer was not your typical teen growing up. She wore black, danced under full moons, and devoured every book in sight. She hasn't changed much. Today, Heather can be found writing in her funky, black Happy Bunny jammie pants, dancing under a full moon, devouring every book in sight, and attending renaissance faire in full costume (and in character).

When Heather's not writing, dressing up, dancing and reading, she's answering email, which she loves to get over at her website.

Product Details

• Age Range: 12 and up
  
• Paperback: 182 pages
• Publisher: Speak; Reprint edition (March 13, 2008)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0142411876
• ISBN-13: 978-0142411872
• Product Dimensions: 8.2 x 5.4 x 0.5 inches
• Shipping Weight: 3.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.2 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (130 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #142,263 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Heather Brewer doesn't believe in happy endings...unless they involve blood.

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

26 of 31 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Another Converted June 23, 2008

By AS King

Format:Paperback

This is the first vampire book I've ever read and I didn't know how I'd feel about it at first. But consider me converted - this was FUN. Because all I had coming into this were old-school ideas of vampires, Heather Brewer showed me how wrong I was to think vampires don't have feelings! I got totally into the realities of Vlad's everyday life - the bullies, the blood bags, etc. Oh - and it's really funny, too, which I loved! I already bought Ninth Grade Slays & can't wait to read it.
Also - I gave this book to my two teen (11 & 12) nephews and both of them really loved it - which is a miracle, because getting them to read ANYTHING is difficult. So - if you know a reluctant reader, this might be the perfect book for them.

15 of 18 people found the following review helpful

2.0 out of 5 stars Eighth Grade Bites April 22, 2010

By Jenny, Wondrous Reads

Format:Paperback

I didn't enjoy Eighth Grade Bites as much as I thought I would, and I'm not sure why. Vampires are my thing, so add some humour to the mix, and on paper I should love it. Instead I found it a fairly hard book to get through, and finished it feeling little to nothing for the characters.

I like what Brewer tried to do with the humour, and I admit I did appreciate all the vampire jokes and references. There's something about a teenage vampire with a garlic allergy that made me laugh, and the fact that Vlad takes it all in his stride just added to the over all tongue-in-cheek feel of the story.

The characters are where my problem lies, which is a shame, because they had the potential to be really good. For me, they lacked any real depth, and I didn't come away from the book feeling like I really knew them. Maybe this improves in later books, which I am still planning to read at some point in the future.

The great ideas were there, I just don't think it was executed as well as it could have been. Still, it was interesting to hear about vampirism from a teenage perspective, and Vlad's father's journal entries interspersed throughout were a nice touch. Although Eighth Grade Bites was slightly disappointing, I'll give the next book a chance, and hope I enjoy it a bit more than this one

17 of 21 people found the following review helpful

2.0 out of 5 stars A Hot Mess, But Good for it's Intended Age Group September 24, 2010

By Acacia

Format:Paperback

I wanted so desperately to like this book - I work with books for a living and I'm always on the look out for good reads for younger teens, especially ones that appeal to boys. So after hearing so many good things about this series I decided to give this a shot. The premise and characters all sounded so fun and the book started out with a definite bang but sadly that's all it really has going for it.

I wish I could give this book two reviews - one for how I think it should be viewed in the eyes of parents and teachers looking to recommend it and one for how it stands up on it's own. For adults looking for good vampire fiction for kids, this does make a very good choice. And with so much vampire fiction on the market being targeted at young girls its nice to see a male alternative pop up. I suspect this book would also make a good selection for reluctant readers at a middle school level - the book keeps it's page count low and the writing styling makes it easy to follow along with for younger teens who aren't yet doing so well with longer chapter books.

However for anyone outside of it's target demographic this book is a hot mess - it's biggest flaw being how both characters and plot are woefully underdeveloped - after finishing this book I could tell you a host a facts about the people populating its pages and yet I couldn't tell you why they felt the way that they did or even how they came by such a decision. We know that Vlad has a crush on a girl in his class but she seems to not function at all out side of this role - other than the fact that she had blue eyes we know nothing about her other than Vlad loves her. What is her personality like? Why does Vlad like her so much that he's rendered speechless in her presence? Is she kind? Smart? I know she has pink lips because they're mentioned 100 times but I know nothing else beyond the color of her lip balm and skirts. This doesn't exactly make for a heart pounding romance.

And everything else in the book seems to follow suit in the same way. Characters are around to move the non existent plot foreword rather than flesh out anything resembling an interesting story line. The adults bumble, the vampires are painfully bland and stupid and the dialog between the teenagers is so stilted that it sounds as if it were ripped from some early 90's So You're Going Through Puberty video. All throughout the book I found myself continually wondering if I wasn't reading a badly abridged copy since the characters came to such abrupt decisions and information that was crucial to the story line was dropped so abruptly in that it was distracting to encounter it.

The writing its self is also incredibly clunky and at times it hinders more than it helps. From the dedication on the opening page one would have thought that the writer would have learned her lessons from On Writing but apparently not. And so we're treated to such clunky instances of "I hate it!" Vlad seethed and "X did this and then X did this again before X picked up the phone and reminded us again his name was x" Jesus! Glad to see she doesn't think her audience is so dumb that she has to remind us of a character's name three times in the same sentence or to tell us that if someone is yelling how much they hate something that must mean that they're seething.

And on top of all this the book was a mess of technical facts and keeping it's own mythology straight. Vlad eats raw hamburger to "get at the blood" and yet even third graders know that the pink juice in raw meet isn't blood. His lunches are normal twinkies stuffed with "carefully injected blood capsules" when it seems so much easier to just bring a thermos. At the end of the book he gets a tattoo and yet no one seems to notice it and/or think it odd a 14 year old has such a marking in a completely conspicuous place as his wrist.

Ah, well, I know I've gone off the deep end of a rant now - there's just so much to nit pick at in this book. Honestly I can't believe an editor actually took a look at this before publication - there are just too many gaping holes in the plot for anyone to take this seriously.

So yes, tweens and mature children will love this book and perhaps rightfully so. But for anyone above 15 it just becomes insulting to your intelligence after awhile to keep reading.