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Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused Paperback – January 10, 2002


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Product Details

  • Paperback: 278 pages
  • Publisher: Huntington House Publishers; 1st edition (January 10, 2002)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1563841908
  • ISBN-13: 978-1563841903
  • Product Dimensions: 8.4 x 5.5 x 0.8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 8.8 ounces
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (41 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #418,891 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Editorial Reviews

Review

"Dean Tong's Elusive Innocence should be a wake-up call to child advocates and lawmakers." --Kathleen Parker, Nationally Syndicated Columnist

"Required reading for any parent, lawyer, or social worker in divorces and child custody disputes." --Roy Black, Criminal Defense Attorney

"Dean Tong's Elusive Innocence should be a wake-up call to child advocates and lawmakers." -- Kathleen Parker, Nationally Syndicated Columnist

"Required reading for any parent, lawyer, or social worker in divorces and child custody disputes." --Roy Black, Criminal Defense Attorney

"Required reading for any parent, lawyer, or social worker in divorces and child custody disputes." --Roy Black, Criminal Defense Attorney

"Dean Tong's Elusive Innocence should be a wake-up call to child advocates and lawmakers." -- Kathleen Parker, Nationally Syndicated Columnist<br /><br />"Required reading for any parent, lawyer, or social worker in divorces and child custody disputes." --Roy Black, Criminal Defense Attorney

About the Author

Dean Tong is an internationally noted forensic trial consultant and expert who specializes in assisting parents and attorneys for contested court cases. Having been retained by wrongly accused fathers and mothers and their attorneys from 49 states in everything from child custody to domestic violence to child sexual abuse to marital rape and to shaken baby syndrome, including consulting on high-profile cases such as Elian Gonzalez and Bridget Marks, Tong is known for providing winning formulas in seemingly no-win case situations including post-conviction cases.

More About the Author

Dean Tong, MSc., is a forensic trial consultant and expert whose practice concentrates on contested divorces, custody battles and abuse cases, nationally. He has tendered, been admitted and testified in multiple criminal and civil courts in cognitive child developmental psychology, child abuse investigations, parental alienation and sexual deviancy/interest testing. Author of the critically acclaimed book - Elusive Innocence - Tong has published three books as well as a peer-reviewed scientific journal article. His fourth book, Children of the Lie, is in the works. He has been seen on CNN, Court-TV, Dr. Phil, and scores of other broadcast programs. His web site is www.abuse-excuse.com

Customer Reviews

Much involved that most never know until it happens to them or to someone they love and care about.
dragonfly
The book was very informative and spot on what we are experiencing with useful suggestions on what to do and resources to use.
Smelly Telly
Mr. Tong addresses the facts regarding the tragic situation of being falsely accused of child abuse.
Kathleen A. Bell

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

46 of 46 people found the following review helpful By Dennis Littrell HALL OF FAMETOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE VOICE on February 14, 2002
Format: Paperback
At the center of this important (and frankly, long overdue) book about parents falsely accused of sexually abusing their children is a pernicious phenomenon called the "Sexual Allegations In Divorce" (SAID) syndrome. This syndrome is symptomatic of a legal and child protective services system gone horribly wrong, so that not only aren't the children being protected from abuse, they end up being abused by the system itself.

The syndrome arises when one of the parties injects false allegations of child sexual abuse into the divorce proceedings in an attempt to get the upper hand. Usually, but not always, it is the mother who does this, especially a mother who, as Tong documents, either has something to hide or is otherwise unfit to gain custody of the children. The accusation works especially well when the child is very young and is easily led by the parent who has custody. The accusation usually works because child protective services and the courts are predisposed to believe the accusing parent, sometimes in complete disregard of the evidence.

What then follows is a nightmare for all concerned, especially the children whose family is now irrevocably split. The accused parent is denied visitation rights and stigmatized as some kind of moral degenerate while the accusing parent is exposed to the children as a liar seeking vengeance. Then comes the sexual abuse interrogations of the children and the "therapy" by counselors, social workers, psychologists and/or psychiatrists.

Accused parents may now lose everything important to them, not only their children, their life savings, but their livelihood and their reputations as well. They are caught in a web of legalities and accusations beyond their ability to contend with or understand.
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35 of 36 people found the following review helpful By Charles Corry on November 10, 2001
Format: Paperback
It is estimated that allegations of domestic violence, abuse, or sexual abuse are presently made in one-third of all divorces, primarily to gain financial, material, or custodial advantages. Studies consistently show that only a small percentage of these criminal charges are justified. Thus, Dean Tong's book "Elusive Innocence: Survival guide for the falsely accused" is an essential reference for the tens of thousands of men trapped in the quicksand of false allegations every year. The book should also be read by every legislator, attorney, judge, mental health professional, victim's advocate, social worker, and child protective service worker dealing with these issues.
False allegations destroy lives, careers, fathers, and children with no gain to anyone except the divorce industry and its parasitic practitioners. Tong gives the background on such sicknesses as the SAID (Sexual Abuse In Divorce) syndrome, the domestic violence industry, borderline personality disorder (BPD), and how the falsely accused can defend themselves in nineteen chapters. Included are case histories, the views of attorneys and mental health professionals, case citations, where to find help, and useful tests. I found especially relevant the extensive documentation of how a man can show he is not violent and not inclined to molest children.
One unaddressed issue is how someone who has served in Marine Corps infantry, as I have, can prove themselves nonviolent when faced with such false accusations. By inference, every man who has served in a combat military organization is a "trained killer" when accused of domestic violence under current laws. But that absence is a trifling drawback to an otherwise excellent book. If you have been falsely accused this is one book you must read.
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22 of 23 people found the following review helpful By Dr. Joseph J. Plaud on December 9, 2001
Format: Paperback
Dean Tong's Elusive Innocence: Survival Guide for the Falsely Accused is a magnificent and much needed handbook to separate fact from fiction in understanding the range of important issues regarding child abuse. What makes Mr. Tong's handbook so important and unique is that it can be used by both the public and professionals alike, and for many who do not understand or appreciate the issues involved in accusations of child abuse, this book will truly open your eyes! Mr. Tong's writing is superb, the organization of the book, intermixing personal stories with legal and social issues, provides for a wonderful reading, and the appendices offer a wealth of resources of information for those needing assistance. I recommend this book most highly for everyone interested (and everyone should be interested) in how our society's laws have developed to protect children, and how these laws are being used to perpetrate what Mr. Tong refers to as "the reverse cycle of child abuse." This book is simply a must-read for all who want to know what is happening in our society regarding the abuse of children. Elusive Innocence is a singular and comprehensive resource that will make you think, and perhaps act, so that our society will more equitably address this important topic, protecting both children and those who stand accused.
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17 of 17 people found the following review helpful By Robert B. Gidding on March 10, 2002
Format: Paperback
Author Dean Tong was falsely accused of molesting his child by his former wife. After surviving that horror, he dedicated his career to helping other falsely accused parents cope and to exposing a system which presumes guilt, not innocence of the accused. Mr. Tong exhorts the falsely accused to fight back and provides the tools necessary to do so.
This book begins with four case studies of real people who had been falsely accused of sex abuse and recounts their personal turmoil including the pain of being cut off from seeing their children. Tong then explores the context in which false allegations arise, first examining the characteristics of the "accuser" and second examining how false allegations often arise during family breakup including divorce and custody fights. The accuser, says Tong, may be mentally disturbed and may suffer from Borderline Personality Disorder. He cautions that people who work with children must be initially skeptical of allegations arising in the context of a family breakup and counsels that we must not jump to conclusions about guilt or automatically believe the reports of children.
The book then examines the weaknesses of the child protective services system, how agencies that investigate abuse are often understaffed, undertrained and underpaid, and how Judges too often defer to the agency's judgment. Its last chapters provide useful guidance to the falsely accused, how to fight back by retaining the right attorney and experts.
I liked this book because it exposes the weaknesses of a child protective system, which, though well meaning, nevertheless makes mistakes and victimizes the innocent. People too often believe that children always tell the truth, too few people realize that children's memory is so suggestible and programmable by adults.
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