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23 of 23 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
EMBRACE THIS BOOK!!, June 6, 2002
This review is from: Embracing Fear: and Finding the Courage to Live Your Life (Hardcover)
With wit, clarity and deep empathy, Thom Rutledge helps us to confront and respond to our fears in his new book, "Embracing Fear". Using the acronym F.E.A.R.,facing, exploring, accepting and responding, he guides us toward an understanding of how we can move ahead with our lives and live with courage and self respect. Differentiating between healthy fear, or what he calls "The Ally", and neurotic fear, which he calls "The Bully", I was stunned at how familiar these characters were in my mind. I know the bully intimately and he's a beast. This book is so joyous though it's made me want to take his horns off and play them like Mexican trumpets at my fiesta of healing. The book also has a generous helping what the author calls, "Nutshells", little swatches of light and wisdom that read sort of like cosmic sound bites. A couple of examples: "God flunks no one, but He sure does give lots of retests" and "Arrogance exists where genuine self-love does not". I've whittled one down even further and I've posted it right above my computer and I'm looking at it now, "Progress Not Perfection". At the very least,"Embracing Fear" is mercifully devoid of the typical self-help jargon. (By the grace of God and good taste, the word "codependent" never appears.) It's more like spending time with and old and wise friend who is not above admitting that he also is far from perfect but progress is right here among us. I've bought several of these and have given them to friends and have been thanked profusely afterward. This is something rare and special and should be shared with anyone you care about who is letting fear beat them up. In a 'nutshell', "Courage is to fear as light is to darkness".
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22 of 22 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Recommended for those who normally avoid self-help books, September 9, 2002
This review is from: Embracing Fear: and Finding the Courage to Live Your Life (Hardcover)
Embracing Fear will be appreciated by readers who usually avoid self-help books. Thom Rutledge, a Nashville psychotherapist, draws on his life and his clinical experience to share frank, irreverent insights into living and growing in today's world. Rutledge distinguishes healthy fear, which motivates us to move forward, from "neurotic" fear, which keeps us paralyzed. We should face fear, he says, but not let it rule our lives. This message is especially timely after the events of 9/11. Embracing Fear deserves attention not only for the main message, but also for the little gems that appear on almost every page. As a reader and writer in the self-help genre, I was impressed by Rutledge's originality. You won't find the usual "positive outlook" bromides here; in fact, we are warned to be leery of the New Age manifestation manifestos. As a therapist, says Rutledge, "I sometimes think of myself as an energy-efficiency consultant."
"Never trust someone who presents himself or herself as the ultimate expert on the human condition."
People who want to know their "life purpose" seem to imply there are "answers in the back of the book." Embracing Fear will be a valuable resource for the thousands of people who face major career and life changes, which are often accompanied by fear. It will also be welcomed by those who are ready for self-help delivered heavy on the realism and easy on the hype.
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17 of 17 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Not an ordinary self-help book, April 8, 2005
This review is from: Embracing Fear: and Finding the Courage to Live Your Life (Hardcover)
*****
This book is a great read all about fear. Specifically, it is about embracing fear---facing fear---rather than running from it, stuffing it, etc. Unlike most self-help books, the author does not presume to be an authority with easy answers; instead, he is a fellow human being who struggles with his own fear and that of his clients. He shares very practical techniques to approach your fears so that you can still have the life you want, regardless of your fears.
Fear underlies most if all negative emotions. I found this book to be very helpful. The author asks many helpful questions such as "What would I do today if I were brave?"...leading me to see where my fears stopped me.
Another technique he uses is splitting our self-talk into the negative voices of unhealthy unnecessary fear (which he calls The Bully) and the positive voices of what we know with our heads and hearts (which he calls The Ally). This has been really helpful to me, too. He makes the point that we will never rid ourselves of fear, but we will be less and less bothered by it as we learn how to face it.
This book differs from an ordinary self-help book in that it is amazingly useful, plus the author is practical, transparent, realistic, and humble. I loved reading it, highlighted it all over the place, and will read it again.
It is an excellent value and worth hours of therapy. I would even suggest it in lieu of therapy! I immediately bought two copies to send to two of my closest friends.
*****
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