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Emotional First Aid: Healing Rejection, Guilt, Failure, and Other Everyday Hurts Paperback – July 29, 2014

55 customer reviews

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Editorial Reviews

Review

“Dr. Guy Winch’s practical, clever and clear-headed book offers proven remedies for the myriad pains of daily life. Timely application will prevent small and medium-size emotional ills from becoming bigger ones—and that’s just what the psychotherapist ordered.”
—Jeanne Safer, PhD, author of Cain’s Legacy: Liberating Siblings from a Lifetime of Rage, Shame, Secrecy, and Regret

"The advice Winch offers in this refreshingly useful book is both practical and practicable -- down-to-earth techniques that really can bring relief when things feel like they're falling apart."
—Anneli Rufus, author of The Big Book of Low Self-Esteem

About the Author

Guy Winch is a psychologist with a private practice in Manhattan as well as an amateur stand-up comedian. 
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Product Details

  • Paperback: 304 pages
  • Publisher: Plume; Reprint edition (July 29, 2014)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0142181072
  • ISBN-13: 978-0142181072
  • Product Dimensions: 5.3 x 0.6 x 8 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 7.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (55 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #9,269 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

125 of 125 people found the following review helpful By Deb on March 27, 2014
Format: Hardcover
As a therapist, I'm constantly looking out for helpful resources for clients. This book has quickly been added to my list. It so clearly explores the seven most common--and inevitable, if you're human!--psychological injuries and then provides specific "first aid" treatments for each:

1. Rejection--The emotional cuts and scrapes of daily life
Description:
Rejections can inflict four distinct emotional wounds, each of which might require some from of emotional first aid: lingering visceral pain, anger and aggressive urges, harm to self-esteem, and damage to feeling that we belong. (p. 17)
Treatments:
* Argue with self-criticism
* Revive your self-worth
* Replenish feelings of social connection
* Desensitize yourself

2. Loneliness--Relationship muscle weakens
Description:
Loneliness makes us constantly on guard, prepared for the disappointment and rejection we are sure will come. As a result, we miss opportunities to make social connections and behave in ways that push others away. (p. 53)
Treatments:
* Remove your negatively tinted glasses
* Identify your self-defeating behaviors
* Take on the other person's perspective
* Deepen your emotional bonds
* Create opportunities for social connection
* Adopt a best friend

3. Loss and Trauma--Walking on broken bones
Description:
Loss and trauma create four psychological wounds. They cause overwhelming emotional pain, they undermine our basic sense of identity and the roles we play in life, they destabilize our belief systems and our understanding of the world, and they challenge our ability to remain present and engaged in our most important relationships. (p.
Read more ›
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15 of 16 people found the following review helpful By heather on April 29, 2014
Format: Kindle Edition Verified Purchase
3 yrs since my husbands tragic death. My life is now wonderful and happy, but when I start dating or trying to form relationships with men, and I get rejected, it seems to hurt x10 times more and takes me longer to move on.
Reading this book gave me strategies and hope. Whenever I experienced rejection or even sensed something wasn't making me feel good, I instantly went into panic mode. I now have some valuable tools to use.
Thank you
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21 of 25 people found the following review helpful By Dr Alice Boyes on July 25, 2013
Format: Kindle Edition
This is a fantastically practical and insightful book for dealing with the everyday stings that we all experience. It's chock full of relatable stories as well as interesting thought experiments that will help you heal when you've experienced situations like rejection, failure, and loss. Read this book once now and then keep it as a reference book for when life strikes and you need to dip back into it for guidance, comfort, and getting clarity on difficult situations and emotions.
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful By SusiQ on September 15, 2013
Format: Hardcover
Simple but concrete solutions to complex problems? A virtual medicine chest to open and use what's inside to heal our woes? The answer is yes. In Guy Winch's new book, Emotional First Aid, he defines what he calls "everyday psychological inquires" and how a person, the average individual, can understand and deal with the curve balls life throws at us. With the caveat that if your pain is so severe that you want to do harm to yourself or worse that professional intervention should be sought, the chapters outline how to determine what is wrong and then how to fix it. If you are lonely or have been rejected or feel like you are a failure, Dr. Winch gives the reader a formula to heal yourself. From written exercises to making apologies or self-forgiveness, the detailed prescriptions are sensible and clear. We all have our issues and Emotional First Aid is a handbook everyone should own.
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13 of 16 people found the following review helpful By renacat3 on September 4, 2013
Format: Hardcover Verified Purchase
Great advice and good anecdotes, although nothing really new that you don't already know. Practical and written with a sense of humor.
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21 of 28 people found the following review helpful By Irene Conlan on August 7, 2013
Format: Hardcover
Guy Winch has done it again. He has written a book so practical, so down to earth and so powerful that it makes you want to slap your forehead and ask, "Why didn't I think of that?" His first book, "The Squeaky Wheel: taught us how to complain in a way that helped us get what we wanted or needed and ruffled as few feathers as possible in the process. Now he teaches us how to deal with the psychological cuts and bruises that most of us have to deal with on a daily basis. They aren't severe enough to require professional attention but they still hurt and need healing. He walks us through a number of minor psychological injuries, namely loneliness, loss and trauma, guilt, rumination, failure and low self esteem. For each of these he gives the type of wound sustained and offers a number of treatments that should give relief. He also provides exercises that help you render the treatment effectively. Further he makes it very clear if and when you need to seek professional help.

It is written with "real life" examples to demonstrate what he's writing about and it is sprinkled with humor to make it fun to read.

The only person who should not read this book is one who has a perfect life and never experiences a setback of any kind. (If you know of one, have them call me. I'd love to meet him or her).

This book is so good I found my puppy munching away on the cover and ready to devour the pages. It was his first, and hopefully last, reading adventure.
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