Customer Reviews

Empire of the Ants [VHS]

5 star:		(4)
4 star:		(6)
3 star:		(8)
2 star:		(4)
1 star:		(5)

 

 

Run for the hills (or the Raid)! Bert I. Gordon, aka Mr. Big (due to his penchant for making films involving giant creatures, and also, it's his initials), brings on some serious cinematic pain with his rendition of author H.G. Wells story Empire of the Ants (1977). Other cinematic examples of Gordon's super-sizing include Beginning of the End (1957), The Amazing Colossal Man (1957), Earth vs the Spider (1958), Attack of the Puppet People (1958), and The Food of the Gods (1976). Gordon, certainly a man of many hats, not only wrote (adapted from an H.G. Wells story), directed and produced the film, but he also was in charge of the special effects. The film stars Joan Collins of TV's Dynasty, Robert Lansing, whose television credits are too numerous to mention but is most familiar to me from the 1959 film 4D Man, and perennial 70's television stars John David Carlson and Jacqueline Scott.

In the beginning we get some painfully obvious foreshadowing involving stock footage, along with voice over, showing ants busy at work. We then cut to workers in HAZMAT suits on a boat, dumping clearly marked barrels of radioactive waste in the water. We see one of the barrels wash up on shore, as the ominous music plays on...Cut to preparations being made for an excursion by yacht to view swampy properties for sale, sponsored by some realty company called Dreamland Properties, or some such thing. It's here we meet Marilyn Fryer (Collins), the woman in charge. How do we know this? Because she's being a real pain in the rear, basically telling everyone she's the boss, especially Dan Stokely (Lansing), the captain of the boat, who, by the way, wears a lovely earring (yargh, I'm a pirate!) throughout the film (man, the 70's were weird). Soon the prospective suckers...er, I mean buyers show up, and what a charming lot they seem to be...adulterers, freeloaders, and just general sleezy characters all around, and they're off, leisure suits and all. They arrive at a pier, disembark from the yacht, and proceed to a tent to get liquored up (ply the rubes with free booze, and the property sells itself, I guess). Everyone then gets on a two-car tram, and tool around, while Marilyn, sitting in the front of the tram, all of about 3 or 4 feet from the clients, starts yelling into a megaphone in case anyone is hard of hearing (if they weren't, they are now). Earlier we saw the drum of radioactive waste wash up on the beach, and we also saw it beginning to leak silver paint, er...I mean radioactive waste, and we also saw ants wallowing around in the oozing material. That can't be good...I mean, if 1950's sci-fi (and Bert I. Gordon) taught us anything, it's that radioactive materials generally have the effect of `embiggening' things. Well, sure enough, the ants exposed to the stuff become humongoid, and start picking off hapless members of this little outing. All I could think was this wasn't going to be good for the realty business, what with the radioactive waste and giants ants. Well, the remaining members of the party discover, to their horror, what ate up their former companions, and rush back to the yacht, only to find it overrun with giant ants. After awhile, they decide to make their way to a nearby river, and we lose a few more members. I have to say, there was something completely satisfying about seeing Joan Collins wallow around in swampy river water. Anyway, they finally make it back to civilization of sorts, try to relate their harrowing tale of escape, but find the town to be oddly apathetic to the news that giant ants are headed their way. Why? Well, this is where picking up on the foreshadowing at the beginning of the film pays off...

In terms of the special effects, the whole rear-projection enlargement technique was fairly well dated by the late 70's, but still managed to work well here at some points, but the noticeable difference in that technique and the use of prop ants certainly delineated the differences in the sizes of the ants. One method use would make them appear as big as a bus, while another would make them seem a large as a man. The actors all seem pretty bored and given they spent a fair amount of time futzing around in a swamp, I am sure they probably figured at some point they weren't getting paid nearly enough. The script, well, is pretty hideous. Inane remarks, pointless declarations, and lame characterizations only serve to make so very obvious who was going to be ant fodder. And not a likeable character in the bunch ensured the audience rooted for the ants, as this particular society really didn't seem worth saving. I did enjoy the sort of twist element near the end, even though it was telegraphed so obviously at the beginning of the film, giving this schlockery a bit of originality and a nice little spin within the genre. I have to say, I did get annoyed early on with some of the sound effects. The ants had two basic effects working, one being a persistent chirping which would indicate their presence nearby, and a screaming sound when they were attacking or being attacked. This second one was definitely the more annoying of the two, as it was akin to having a woman scream in your ear every ten seconds. A nice throwback to the 50's, but if you're into giant ants, go watch Them! (1954).

MGM provides a nice look wide screen anamorphic print here, and special features include an original theatrical trailer for the film. I guess if I learned anything from Empire of the Ants, it's that if you are ever running through the swamp with Joan Collins, fleeing giant ants, and she gets her sweater caught, don't stop to help her, as she won't return the favor.

Cookieman108

1977 B-Movie starring Joan Collins, who gives free cruises to people in hopes they will invest in a soon to be built tourist dreamland. The only problem is the island that "Dreamland Shores" is located on is also occupied by huge ants. Contains all the elements you want in a classic b-movie, such as huge mutated insects, fantastic dialog, low-budget special effects, and an actress (in this case Joan Collins) who went on to bigger things and probably wants this movie to be forgotten.

Based on H.G. Wells book of the same title. Also features Robert Pine of "CHiPS" fame.

"Empire of the Ants" is one of the most laughable monster spectacles of the 1970s, even by Bert I. Gordon's standards. Gordon, whose trademark was giant or tiny things brought to life in "horrifying" adventures, was the patriarch of such films as "Village of the Giants", "Attack of the Puppet People", "The Amazing Colossal Man", and most notably "The Food of the Gods". Of course Gordon did some more conventional pictures as well, but he will always be known for bad rear projections and puppets of animals of intensely incorrect size. By the time this film was done in 1977, his effects techniques were extremely dated, and the ants actually look much less realistic than many creatures from his earlier films. The rear projection method is especially bad, and the sense of scale of the ants changes throughout the film. Watch for the scene at the sugar refinery when the ants climb the sky next to the building. On the other hand, the projections are ultra-realistic compared to the ant puppets used for the close-up ant attack shots, scenes which are so funny they actually account for the relatively generous three star rating I gave the film.

The film opens with a narrator somberly intoning "This is the ant. Treat it with respect..." over closeups of an anthill. The narrator goes on to explain that ants are incredibly smart and that "some herd aphids, just as man herds cattle". The film then shifts to the credits and radioactive waste drums being dumped into the ocean in a scene extremely reminiscent of "The Horror of Party Beach". Of course a drum of waste immediately washes ashore and springs a leak, which ants flock to. By a stroke of luck, Joan Collins is an uppity real estate agent trying to sell lots of radioactive swampland in a development called "Dreamland Shores". If ever there was a role Joan was born to play, it was this one. Joan has chartered a boat skippered by Dan Stokely (Robert Lansing) who turns in by far the most competent performance in the movie. There is a cast straight out of any mid 70's disaster movie, and upon alighting at the island unfettered lust and emotion immediately breaks out in multiple unsavory subplots.

With the menacing theme music (which sounds very similar to a John Williams score that you may be quite familiar with) swelling portentously, the ants start to divide and conquer, ruining several ridiculous romances and making this into more of a soap opera starring Joan Collins and giant ants than an actual horror movie. The Lawsons (Jack Kosslyn and Ilse Earl), an unlikable couple, are the first to depart this mortal realm when they venture into the woods to inspect the fire hydrants on their own (honest). The rest of the tour group continues on their inspection of the property without even noticing they are gone. When their absence is noticed two other passengers go looking for them, finding something they really didn't want to in the process, and making everyone wonder if you are venturing into a swamp for commercial purposes, wouldn't you at least take the precaution of packing a radio? There's an advanced tram system after all, but no communication facilities of any sort.

After the insect mayhem commences in earnest, they have to decide whether to go on foot, stand their ground, or hike two miles to a boat and freedom (I should point out that the ants attacked the boat they arrived on; it burned and sank). The dialogue in the film is unbelievably inane, but my favorite line comes when the group is deciding what to do at this juncture and one woman shrieks "We're all too scared to vote!" Really? That's a new one. They decide to make a run for the boat, and despite lots of ludicrous excitement-inducing plot devices (Collin's sweater is snagged on a small twig. How will she ever get free?!) the majority of the group gets into a rowboat, and after the patently absurd and entirely predictable death scene of the old freeloading couple, Harry and Velma Thompson (Harry Holcombe and Irene Tedrow), they start to paddle down the stream. It doesn't take long to pick out the next to die, as the histrionics that emerge from Larry Graham (Robert Pine) are so over-the-top ("It's unfair this should happen to me!") It turns out the ants actually are smarter than the cast members, because they capsize the boat and start chasing the five remaining survivors in a single direction ("They're herding us like cattle!") Just in the nick of time, they encounter a homestead owned by a crazy old couple who solemnly intone "Whatever you do, don't let them take you to the sugar refinery", implying they know about the giant ant menace.

Suddenly in a jarring bit of direction, the survivors are in a police car, being taken to the station, lodging, and the sugar refinery (of course). After a subplot about the difficulties of renting a car, the survivors steal a car, and are quickly intercepted by police officers who take them to the refinery. This is no ordinary refinery. When a whistle blows giant ants swarm to get sugar, and the entire place is operated by zombies. Well, they aren't actually undead type zombies, but they are incapable of independent thought, and the sheriff and mayor are in on the ghastly mind-control plot in which the queen ant controls all the people to do her will by releasing pheromones in a big spray of stink at them in a phone booth. This is called indoctrination, and everyone needs a booster once a week. Naturally our survivors head straight for the front of the line. Joan Collins gets sprayed, and becomes an instant convert to the wisdom of the great ant. Next up is Captain Lansing, who lights the queen on fire with a road flare, while fellow hero-in-waiting Joe Morrison (John David Carson) escapes, steals a gasoline tanker truck and lights the whole place ablaze resulting in fiery chaos and a ludicrous burning ant puppet. In the end the sheriff joins the anti-ant forces and the four principals escape in another stolen boat, while the music swells.

"Empire of the Ants" is definitely one of Bert I. Gordon's most ridiculous projects, but it does have quirky moments of pure campy entertainment that make it worthwhile for any aficionado of cinematic cheese. The script is terrible, even for a movie of this sort, the acting is atrocious, the special effects look positively ludicrous, and Joan Collins playing it deadly seriously sends it over the top. If you want a scary horror film, do not even think about it; if you want to laugh at a spectacular Hollywood embarrassment, this is the film for you.

Cheesy movie, really bad even for a b-movie, saw it a while back on late night cable. Really cheezy.

Joan Collins appeared bored through most of the film. The box cover is a sale ploy. You never see Miss Collins dressed that way in the movie.

Robert Lansing had some great moments as the fearless boat skipper. His performance was believable.

The special effects were bad. The music was not memorable.

Another thing: half way through the movie it goes from bad science fiction to twilight zone when the survivors reached the town. They may have escaped the radioactive ants, but escaping the zombie townspeople will be harder.

The movie ends in a sugar factory. Burnt sugar and roasted ants do not make an appetizing dish.

This movie and the H.G. Wells' short story have nothing in common. Read the short story.

This is a moderately entertaining, low budget film starring a young and lovely Joan Collins. She plays the part of a real estate agent who inveigles people to visit an island by offering them a free cruise. Once there, she tries to get them to buy property on the island, which is to be developed into a luxurious habitat for the well heeled.

Unfortunately for her, it turnes out that the island is populated by giant, carnivorous ants, who display an uncanny intelligence and seem to thwart their human interlopers. Before one knows it, people start disappearing, and those left find themselves on the run. While the special effects are typical of a B movie, the film is better than one would think and deserving of a look, if one is fond of this genre.

Perhaps above all, Joan Collins is internationally renowned for her role of Alexis Carrington Colby in DYNASTY; the most highly rated evening TV drama of all time. For eight years, viewers were treated to a weekly dose of Alexis' elaborate schemes for power, money and love. Well, Joan's character here is really no different and was probably great practice for her eventual TV persona.

Joan plays Marilyn Fryer, a real estate agent and land developer for "Dreamland Shores". However, unbeknownst to her freeloading group of highly impossible investors, the shores have been contaminated with toxic chemicals that make ANTS grow to humongous proportions!

Add in a sugar processing plant, horrendous dialogue, bad acting, & cheesy special effects and you have a great, classic B-grade horror film. Based on an H.G. Wells story...

If you liked "Them", "Pirahna", "Frogs" or other films that follow animals or insects taking over the world, you will certainly enjoy this pic. Happy Watching!

I am a big fan of the underrated, marvellously talented late Robert Lancing, so I collect his stuff. And he did some wonderful B flicks that are B Movie Addicts delight. My favourite 4D man is one of the best, but this one is not too shabby.

Joan Collins is head of a group pushing an island paradise resort - yet to be built - and Lancing is the pilot of the boat that brings in the latest boatload of suckers....I mean investors...to view the imaginary golf course and club house. Only problem, refugees from THEM! are lurking in the woods making off with islanders and soon to investors of Joan's resort. The effects are typical Drive-in B movie quality (but hey, I miss the old drive-ins!! When I visited Kentucky they would have dusk to dawn creature features and that is where I first saw this movie), but Lancing as always is better than the material he is given and makes this worth the ticket.

So stack up four of five our your best Vincent Price and Chris Lee films, add Empire of the Ants (and watch the wonderful and well missed Robert Lancing), pop a bowl of popcorn , turn out the lights and imagine you are in a car with a speaker hanging from the window. Have your own dusk to dawn creature features.

Off to see if I can hunt up a copy of 4D man in DVD.....

Hold onto your wits and hold on for a wild ride as Joan Collins leads the way on this South Florida adventure. Joan is in the real-estate business, actually she's a con artist trying to sell worthless swampland to anyone that will listen. The would-be customers gather on the boat for a free ride and refreshments. Once at the location, the high pressure sales pitch begins. Little do they know that some ants have been swimming in radioactive waste and are now the size of Cadillacs.

Joan looks lovely running through the woods and going down the river in a rowboat. She's very sexy when she sweats profusely. Not everyone in her party is as fortunate as her though. An elderly couple who can't keep up bite the dust. Also a husband who decides it's cheaper to sacrifice a wife than pay for a divorce watches his wife get devoured. No real loss for him, he already had his eyes on another chick in the little band.

Well the ending is pretty weird. Seems the whole town is under the control of the ants thanks to some kind of Brain washing gas that the people get a whiff of when placed in a glass box with the Queen Ant. Alas poor Joan doesn't make it out of the box. The ant decides she'd rather make a good meal.

I love Joan Collins and got this movie only because of her. She once said this was the most grueling part she ever played. If you like Joan too, I highly suggest this little gem of a film.

The only reason I watched, or tried to watch, "Empire of the Ants" is because I adore and love Joan Collins. I always knew it was a terrible film because I had seen it on various stations late at night during the early nineties. Also, after reading Joan's two autobiographies and reading her pages on the filming of this movie a few years back I simply had to rewatch the film. In both her books Joan makes it known that "Empire of the Ants" was the hardest and most grueling picture she had ever made.

She writes how the film was shot in the Florida swamps in November and December, 1976, with the acors being exposed to insects and reptiles. The scene where the actors are tipped over while in a canoe was hellish as the water hadn't moved in a dozen years and Joan prayed she wouldn't be eaten alive by some strange underwater creature. According to Joan, who never does her own stunts, the stunt doubles hadn't arrive from L.A. probably because the producer was too cheap to hire them.

While doing this piece of crap Joan suffered bruises, cuts, and on one stormy morning nearly became blind in one eye when a door to a car slammed against her face because of the fierce winds.

Collins did the movie like any desperate actor: because she was broke and needed the money. Her salary was a paltry $15,0000, an amount extremely low even for someone starring in a low-budget horror film from the mid seventies.

As a lover of the horror genre "Empire of the Ants" wouldn't even be classified as a horror movie. I rate it as simply a terrible film. I have to wonder why it was ever made as the script was rediculous, the acting dreadful, and the scenery dreary.

Joan Collins was the only bright spot in an otherwise hideous film, but Robert Pine, who would go on to success on TV's "CHIPS", plays a sexy woman-hungry guy.