Empty Chair, The: Handling Grief on Holidays and Special Occasions [Paperback]

Robert C. De Vries (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: September 1, 2001

Sensitive counsel and comforting guidance on how to handle holidays and special occasions without your loved one.

Editorial Reviews

From the Inside Flap

Like a firestorm blazing through a forest, the grief of losing a loved one seems to leave nothing but ashes in its path. The hope and meaning in life appear to vanish. And at no time is that pain more acute than on holidays and other special occasions.

Yet even after a forest fire, eventually there is new growth. Out of the devastation of grief you can begin again.

In The Empty Chair, the authors, who have each experienced the death of a spouse, share both pastoral and mental health insights on how you can handle significant days. Offering a comforting blend of emotional support, spiritual guidance, and personal experience, this book is a reflective yet practical approach to finding peace and joy on your journey through grief.

Back flap
Susan J. Zonnebelt-Smeenge (R.N., Ed.D.) is a clinical psychologist at Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Services. Robert C. DeVries (D.Min, Ph.D.) is professor of church education at Calvin Theological Seminary and an ordained minister. They live in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

From the Back Cover

How to handle holidays and special occasions without your loved one.

Whether you've lost a spouse, parent, child, friend, or sibling, The Empty Chair invites you to journey through grief toward life-giving healing. You'll learn how to incorporate new traditions on special days like anniversaries and birthdays, create memorials that honor and affirm your loved one's life, rebuild your individual sense of identity, and more. Most of all, you'll discover a new sense of joy that can become a special part of future holidays.

"This work affirms the difficulty of celebrating special occasions when in the midst of grief and offers practical suggestions and insights. A remarkable resource."
--Ann Bartlett, coordinator, Mayo Hospital Hospice Program

"Help and hope for all who face the holidays anxiously because a special loved one is absent."
--James R. Kok, director, International Conference on Care and Kindness, Crystal Cathedral

"The action suggestions are helpful. The meditations at the end of each chapter act as a healing balm."
--John Morgan, director of King's College Centre for Education about Death and Bereavement

"The authors impart a wisdom found not only in their intellects but captured in the priceless experiences of their hearts."
--Martin L. Hollebeek, past president, Michigan Funeral Directors Association

"A unique and useful way to assist in managing one's grief during a very difficult time."
--Ron E. Wilder, president, Association for Death Education and Counseling

See all Editorial Reviews

Product Details

• Paperback: 96 pages
• Publisher: Baker Books; 1 edition (September 1, 2001)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0801063779
• ISBN-13: 978-0801063770
• Product Dimensions: 6.6 x 4.6 x 0.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 3.4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #562,475 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • #54 in Books > 4-for-3 Books > Health, Mind & Body > Death & Grief > General
  • #67 in Books > 4-for-3 Books > Health, Mind & Body > Death & Grief > Grief & Bereavement

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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

12 of 12 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Help for the Holidays, August 10, 2004

By 

S. Byrd (Gerogia) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Empty Chair, The: Handling Grief on Holidays and Special Occasions (Paperback)

This is a wonderful easy read that helped me through a difficult time. I thought that I had completed the grieving process for my father, but realized that during the Holidays I would get really down. After reading The Empty Chair, I realized that what I was going through was normal, and needed to deal with those emotions. Since reading this book, I have learned how to enjoy the Holidays and remember the good times with my father instead of resenting and grieving that he is not there to share those special times.

If you know of anyone who just lost someone close to them this is an excellent gift.

10 of 10 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Ritualizing Loss, October 28, 2002

By 

Carol MOrris (Indianapolis, IN) - See all my reviews

This review is from: Empty Chair, The: Handling Grief on Holidays and Special Occasions (Paperback)

This book is an excellent tool for ritualizing loss in any situation, especially during the holidays. It offers an effective format to simply state what you may be holding back while sitting around the holiday dinner table or gathering around the Christmas tree or at a family reunion. It is often hard to spontaneously say that we miss the person who is no longer there, whether it be from death or divorce, that there is an empty spot in our hearts. You may get choked up while going through the suggested format, but it can be extremely healing.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:

4.0 out of 5 stars easy and quick read for grief advice, January 11, 2009

By 

K. Wright (Chicago) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: Empty Chair, The: Handling Grief on Holidays and Special Occasions (Paperback)

I used this book to help prepare a 40 minute discussion/talk on managing grief during the holidays. I would recommend it for several reasons: first, it's easy to read and pretty short but still adequate enough for the specific topic; second, I really liked the organization of the chapters - each section was broken down into a chapter about a phase of grief, a chapter on Christian meditation specific to that phase, and a chapter on practical application and actions you could try for that phase. Overall I would say this is a great read if you are looking for something quick and basic with some practical advice strewn throughout. It is not a comprehensive psychological look at grief and I also wouldn't recommend it for someone who is in the immediate wake of a loss.