27 of 27 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
It Ends With You - A Brilliant Book, November 28, 2003
This review is from: It Ends with You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction (Hardcover)
Doctor Tina Tessina's new book tackles a problem that is difficult to live with. Dysfunctional families do cause life long problems for their members. It leaves them with emotional baggage that is very difficult to dispose of.
I know this is true because I live in such a family. The exact details of my problem will not be revealed in this review. But I think it gives me a greater understanding about what Doctor Tessina is trying to achieve than most.
The book explains in easy to understand language about the problems faced by people raised in a non-caring and sharing environment. There are two important aspects of the human psyche that need to be addressed by those damaged by a dysfunctional family. These two aspects are, self-awareness and self-acceptance, together they form the basis of human dignity.
Guidance on how to achieve self-awareness and self-acceptance is well documented. I found the exercises most valuable and relevant to my needs. I am sure that other people in my situation would find them just as useful.
Once a person has accepted who they are and learnt to love themselves, they can relate better to others. The book shows in some detail how to achieve this. If the steps set out in the exercises are practiced regularly I am confident they will bring about positive changes.
To develop as an individual you need to learn new skills, to be shown your deficiencies, your strengths, how to plan ahead, become aware of yourself and be in control. Mastering all of these tasks is impossible without some form of guidance. It Ends With You - is the perfect tool to guide those wanting to grow away from dysfunction, and embark on the path to realizing their true potential. That is a well balanced, loving and caring person.
This is a book that I know will help those seeking to find answers to their dilemma. No one should be made to suffer when a solution is at hand.
I regard this book as the best of it type on this topic and cannot recommend it highly enough.
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20 of 20 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Dr. Tessina Helps You Help Yourself, February 27, 2004
This review is from: It Ends with You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction (Hardcover)
Does everyone have a 'wounded child' in their psyche? And is it really necessary to undergo years of analysis to exorcise these leftovers from childhood? Psychologists are moving away from long, drawn out therapeutic interventions in favor of a much quicker method of helping dislodge dysfunctional patterns to make way for healthy relationships and happy lives. And Prozac and Paxil aren't necessarily part of the picture.
Tina Tessina, PhD, provides a road map for those who are ready to face and change the patterns that prevent happiness and fulfillment in their lives. It Ends With You, Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction, is a self-help tome that makes relatively quick work of years of therapy that some endure on an expensive couch.
Like a fruitful meditation, It Ends With You is a guided visualization through one's past history and into a healthier future. Tessina understands that each of us is in charge of our own mental health, and helps readers find the reigns to take control of their happiness and their lives.
"The task for all of us is to rise above the issues and wounds of childhood," writes Tessina. "Becoming truly adult, autonomous, able to govern ourselves and our responses to those around us."
Tessina takes readers on a journey that examines family patterns that persist for generations, mapping the positive and negative trends to help recognize the habits we've unconsciously brought into our own lives from childhood. She helps us recognize negative habits of thinking and behavior and replace them with positive routines that lead to healthier outcomes. She calls it "recreating yourself."
Tessina uses the weather to help readers identify and understand emotions - comparing sadness to a rainstorm, happiness to a clear, sunny day. She equips readers with the skills to be their own life coaches.
"Ultimately it is you who must do the changing," Tara Solomon, Advice Diva of the Miami Herald advised a reader recently. "When you start believing that you have the ability to change the course of your life, including your relationships with men - no matter what you have been through - you will."
But Tessina also offers guidance on selecting a therapist if the going gets too rough to manage on one's own, and tips to realizing when it's time for help. One way or another, Tessina helps readers put dysfunctional family habits in cold storage, for good
Because as Solomon says, "Don't you want to be happy?"
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11 of 12 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars
Reassuring guide to growing up (finally) and doing it right, November 15, 2003
This review is from: It Ends with You: Grow Up and Out of Dysfunction (Hardcover)
Still suffering from your miserable childhood? According to author Tessina, you can learn to get past all that - at any point in your life -- by finally understanding yourself and how you have been affected by your early experiences. This book shows you how to stop repeating old and painful patterns with a series of questions, insights, and easy and organic exercises. Use instead of or along with a therapist or to help you decide if you would benefit from therapy.
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