Customer Reviews

The Enlightened Sex Manual & audio CD

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4 star:		(2)
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If you are becoming familiar with David Deida, then this book is one good place to start, especially if you are doing so as a couple. This book describes Deida's view of masculine/feminine polarity, sexual energy, sexual desire, and more. And Deida being Deida, it is about sex and spirituality and growth. The book gives the sense that we are being offered an ancient way or yoga or art. We get the sense that Deida has learned this tantric-esque wisdom from various teachers, and now he is transmitting his knowledge to us. Maybe that sounds strange, but I've come to trust his advice and insights. An audio CD-ROM is included, in which Deida describes a number of experiential exercises. A remarkable aspect about Deida is that some of what he says about women is counterintuitive to men, and some of what he says about men is counterintuitive to women. And you are likely to disagree with some of what he tells you about yourself and your sex. But when you test these things out with the opposite sex, you find out that he's spot on. He's on to things that most of us don't understand, I believe.

Before buying this specific product, take a look at Deida's website/portal. Get a sense of ALL his products and pick the one that makes the most sense. He offers a fair amount of audio material, and if you aren't an avid reader, these may be more helpful. He has recently released a DVD titled "Function, Flow and Glow: The Art of Sexual Yoga," in which he shares his views of therapy, art and spirituality. He claims that he's mostly about teaching the "art" of great sex and loving, though he delves into the other areas with considerable insight and wisdom. The DVD is entertaining and informative (and funny), but I think it is mostly targeted toward the Ken Wilber / integrative spirituality crowd. You might be a bit confused if you are not familiar with the "Integral" world, but I suspect you'll find something of value anyway. I should probably note that Deida doesn't pretend that what he offers is empirically validated science. If that is what you are looking for, you won't find it here.

Another good place to start (even if you are a woman, I believe) is "The Way Of The Superior Man: A Spiritual Guide to Mastering the Challenges of Woman, Work, and Sexual Desire." Many view this as Deida's master work, and I can see why. "Superior" in the title is misleading because it is easily construed as macho-arrogant. But I doubt you'll come away with this impression. I learned about this book a few months ago from a woman in San Diego who is also a psychotherapist friend, and she thought this was a really great book. I've been reading this book over and over since then, and I have to say I agree with her. I learned plenty.

Just wanted to respond to these fear-arousing posts about David Deida being a "follower of a...demonically deluded cult leader". Curiously, these exact verbatim posts have been made to most of Deida's books listed on Amazon (I haven't checked them all). Seems like some kind of organized effort going on here to smear Deida.

I'm a pretty tolerant guy - everyone has a right to their own opinion, etc. But to suggest that David Deida (or Ken Wilbur for that matter) is a brainwashed follower of Satan, and that you will become infected from reading his stuff, seems pretty laughable to me. Any innovator worth his salt has been accused of the same thing, like, you know, DaVinci, Copernicus, Darwin, St. Francis, Martin Luther, Jesus of Nazareth, etc.

These two gifted thinkers, Deida and Wilbur, are cutting-edge intellectuals, ahead of their time. They are leaders, not followers. Neither has any interest in "controlling" you or what you think, although there are obviously some out there who do. Fifty years from now, educated people will still be studying their writings, while "Bubba Free John" will be like that weirdo who had that cult out in California about the comet Kahoutec and the aliens on the dark side of the moon. What was his name again? I rest my case.

I have read two of Deida's books, The Way of the Superior Man, and The Enlightened Sex Manual. I'm a pretty accomplished social scientist myself, but I know when to tip my hat to an Enlightened Master, and Deida is one. If you need the Thought Control Police to tell you what you may or may not read, and you think the Salem witch trials and the McCarthy hearings were right on, then skip on over to Pat Robertson's web site to see what you are allowed to read. For everyone else, Deida has a lot to offer, particularly if you are trying to find your own way in the modern world of gender roles, relationships and sex.

Ken Wilber has described this as the only sex manual that you will ever need, and it is difficult to disagree with him. Though Mabel Iam's books are a fine complement to David's work.

David is controversial, but then what innovator is not? He writes and teaches from the perspective of 20 years work with hatha yoga, pranayama, t'ai chi and Tantra. One of the things which I most like about his work is the constant emphasis on the dance of dualities, which has been a major focus of my own work for more than two decades. False dichotomies, such as good/bad, male/female, winner/loser, have, like other false beliefs, caused great sadness and frustration, and it is so important for people to know that there is another way.

Highly recommended for adults who want to heal and enrich their lives.

Finally, a book that explains what it is men don't get and what to do about it.

It explains why women suddenly lose interest in sex when the guy is really going.

It's not new age-y, it's the most grounded and sensible manual I've ever read. Here's a paragraph p. 108:

"Growing up, I was raised to treat boys and girls, men and women, equally. To me, that meant treating them the same. I simply had no idea that in intimacy, sameness is not sexy. It was a while until I learned that magnetic sexual polarity is based on the attractive play between masculine and feminine forces, which are equal in power, but also very different. Sex is the play of their differences, their push and pull, their interpenetration, union, and pleasurable unity. But a mush soup of mushy neutered sameness is not the basis for sexual play."

Taught by a man and and gives essential information for men. It describes sex on a physical level (and how many men get stuck here), then how it gets more intimate on a feeling level (and how most women function here), and even more intense when a merging unity happens between partners. YES! A book that gets beyond the physical.

I bought this for three men in my life. So good!

"Quite simply, the best sex manual in print, for the enlightened, the unenlightened, and everybody in between." ~Ken Wilber

This respectfully written little book gives you the basics for healthy love making. If you are into learning how to use sex as a doorway to communion with your inner self/partner/God & undo any energetic/physical/emotional blocks in your system, than this book will serve as a clear guide. All of David Deida's books are great. I also highly recommend "Making Love" by Barry Long. That book has some helpful information that I have found profoundly improves lovemaking, as well as some mythology that I could do without.

Of many books from this extraordinary author, this stands out as a great basic sex manual (some of his, and so many other, works seem too basic) with a flashy title (gotta bring home the bacon) and very intimate writing style that makes it hard to put down.

David puts it "the way it is". I enjoy his bold language, and speaking openly of sexuality and relationship, and excellent information on ways to change your current life to create an estatic way of being for yourself and in relationship.

David Deida writes of the connection between love, sex & spirituality. This book has theory, stories to illustrate his points, & practical exercises for the true pilgrim in this land. As a Westerner, I have learned so little of real sexual spirituality, this book makes so much I intuited clear.

David deida is simply brilliant at what he does. Fantastic for spicing up ones love life, but not only... I found his work to be quite transformative and has affected my relationship with myself and the world. I highly recommend him!

While I prefer David Deida's audio lectures over his written material, I am again reminded that Deida's insight is transformative and stands alone as the best in spiritual/sexual teaching.