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Enlightenment for Nitwits: The Complete Guide Kindle Edition

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Length: 226 pages

The Book of Joan by Melissa Rivers
Melissa Rivers relates funny, poignant and irreverent observations, thoughts, and tales about the woman who raised her: Joan Rivers. Learn more

Editorial Reviews

Review

Enlightenment for Nitwits is the funniest book I have read in several decades. Without quoting the book, it is difficult to recognize its utter simplicity: "If you're not in absolute bliss by the end of it, you might want to increase your meds." "If you're reading this before the invention of the printing press, be advised it is forbidden to interfere with the course of human history." Everything, from his grandmother's urine and feces samples, beautifully gift wrapped and left on the train, to blowing it by having a thirty second negative thought, is the name of the game. Nothing is sacred. "Sometimes you have to spend another $3 at Walmart to get class and elegance." You can defend to the death your right to shop naked or you can buy the book and enjoy 223 pages of delightful spoofs.
--C. Norman Shealy, M.D., Ph.D., author of Life Beyond 100

About the Author

Shepherd Hoodwin has been channeling the Michael entity since 1986. He also does intuitive readings, mediumship, past-life regression, healing, counseling, and channeling coaching. He has conducted workshops on the Michael teachings throughout the United States. He is also the author ofJourney of Your Soul: A Channel Explores the Michael Teachings (North Atlantic Books, 2013), Meditations for Self-Discovery: Guided Journeys for Communicating with Your Inner Self, and Loving from Your Soul: Creating Powerful Relationships. Upcoming titles include Opening to Healing Energy, Growing Through Joy, and Being in the World. Shepherd is a graduate of the University of Oregon in Music. He lives in Laguna Niguel, California.

Product Details

  • File Size: 1677 KB
  • Print Length: 226 pages
  • Publisher: Summerjoy Press (August 25, 2011)
  • Publication Date: August 25, 2011
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B005JE2CGM
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,349,446 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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More About the Author

Shepherd Hoodwin has been channeling since 1986, and specializes in the fascinating Michael teachings, about how we set up our lifetimes. He is an intuitive, workshop leader, and teacher. He also does healing, mediumship, past-life readings and therapy, counseling, and channeling coaching (teaching others to channel). He is the author of the hilarious "Enlightenment for Nitwits: The Complete Guide" His most recent books are "Opening to Healing" and "Journey of Your Soul: A Channel Explores the Michael Teachings" (second edition, North Atlantic Books, 2013).

He is also the author of "Meditations for Self-Discovery: Guided Journeys for Communicating with Your Inner Self" (print and Kindle) and "Loving from Your Soul: Creating Powerful Relationships" (Kindle).

Upcoming books include "Divine Innervention: How God Stops the Bad Guys Without Ruining Her Hair," "Growing Through Joy," and "Being in the World."

Shepherd lives in Laguna Niguel, California. He can be contacted through his website at http://summerjoy.com (where you can sign up for his Perspectives newsletter).

You can find more of his material at:
http://enlightenmentfornitwits.com (where you can sign up for a newsletter devoted to that book)
Twitter: @EnlightenNitwit, @shepherdh
http://www.facebook.com/shepherd.hoodwin

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful By Libby's Literary Library on August 28, 2012
Format: Paperback
A hodgepodge of ridiculousness, with no redeeming value whatsoever.

Taken with a grain of salt, an open mind, and a love for sarcasm...this book will blow your mind, and burst your belly (from laughing so hard).

It's almost impossible to describe, because it's so random, haphazard and filled with absurd silliness (along with just a wee bit of irreverence)

Caution: 1) Before reading, empty your bladder (if you don't you're sure to wet your pants), and get a box of tissues (or you'll have tears running down your face), and DO NOT EAT OR DRINK, (because you'll be sure to choke or shoot liquid out your nose). 2) If you're really really really easily offended, and can't laugh at yourself, you should probably pass on this book. Hoodwin makes light of just about everything and everyone. I personally only found a couple of sentences that I would have edited out, and I'm a prude.

Yes, it's THAT FUNNY.

(Originally posted on Libby's Library. Disclaimer: I did receive a copy of this book free of charge, so that I could write this review. NO other compensation was received, except for an abundance of giggles and guffaws!)
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Amber from JadeLouise Designs on August 28, 2012
Format: Paperback
When I first cracked this book I wasn't quite sure what to expect. I've never really read a book like this before. My usual genre for books is YA Fiction or Fantasy. But the description of this book was one that I just couldn't pass up giving a try. I need some good humor in my life every now and then.

For me it took a while to get used to Shepherd Hoodwin's style of writing. It is definitely different from what I am used it. It is quite random and jumps around a lot. It's not a story line, and a lot of the writing is unrelated to the others. Basically think of a book filled of witty one liners and you will have an idea of how the writing flows in Enlightenment for Nitwits.

Yet after about the first chapter I was used to the different writing style and soon found myself laughing. Actually laughing, out load! The trick is to understand that everything in this book is NOT to be taken seriously! There is some material that some religious affiliations could find offensive if they forget that everything in this book is a classic satire! As long as you remember that through the entire book, you too will find yourself laughing.

No, the entire book is not centered around religion. In fact the religious humor is only a very small part. It had a different subject for each chapter and explores all areas of life. The best is when his dry humor is relating a stereotyped personality and you realize you know someone just like them! Even better is when you realize you are that someone! Yes, you need to be able to laugh at yourself and at life.

I quite enjoyed that this book was quite clean in terms of language and content. There was no vulgar, explicit or inappropriate sexual content. The language is completely clean.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Kevan on August 23, 2012
Format: Paperback
The title itself, doesn't begin to capture the humor throughout this book!
I wasn't quite sure what I would find when I began reading but quickly realized that this wasn't like anything I have read before and a book that I didn't want to put down any time soon.
Shepherd Hoodwin chooses to touch on serious subjects with a heavy dose of humor and sarcasm with never ending lol topics/discussions like Potty Training Your Inner Child, Lipstick on a Pig and My Toilet Runneth Over.
My absolute favorite is Chapter 9, Words To Live By. On my journey of enlightenment, I have laughed at myself and maybe a little bit at those around me, agreed with Shepherd Hoodwin's sarcastic but true revelations and realized the irony of some chosen paths to enlightenment and so much more. Chpater 9 predicts that people will now want to hear just how wise I have become and Chapter 9 gives me all the answers I will need!
The best way to read this book is to savor and enjoy every morsel of wit and humor by reading a part of it each day.
You can meditate, pray or arrange your furniture just so on your quest of self-help and personal growth or you can have some fun in your journey and read Enlightenment for Nitwits the Complete Guide To 2012 & Beyond!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Life as Leels on August 23, 2012
Format: Paperback
I will be the first to admit that when I saw the title of the book, I actually feared opening it. I wasn't really in the mood for anything with the word "enlightenment" in it. Of course, I should have known better when it said "for nitwits".

I cautiously opened the book and began reading.

I. Couldn't. Put. It. Down!

I was literally laughing out loud - which is not a good thing when you are reading in bed at 11pm while hubby is trying to sleep because he gets up at 3am for work (oops!) But it was so funny and so great - I had to share!

I truly enjoyed this book and it was unlike anything I have read... well, at least in a really long time! I would highly recommend this book to anyone with a laid back, good sense of humor!
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful By Jenelle on August 23, 2012
Format: Paperback
I have to say that I wasn't sure if I was going on like the book or what to expect as there is a star on the front cover as a recommendation from "recommendation from "God, the Creator of the Universe" and there was a letter from Jesus in the book, which I did raise an eyebrow at.
But I decided to be open minded and u was pleasantly surprised as this was probably one of the most interesting and entertaining books that I have read in a long time. I almost read the book in one sitting as once you start you can't put it down. I quickly realized that this is definitely not a book is not for those that are easy offended or can't take a joke.
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