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Enslaved by Ducks [Kindle Edition]

Bob Tarte
4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (353 customer reviews)

Digital List Price: $13.95 What's this?
Print List Price: $13.95
Kindle Price: $9.27
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Book Description

The book that Entertainment Weekly called "hilarious," Publishers Weekly declared "a true pleasure," Booklist called "heartwarming," and the Dallas Morning News praised as "rich and funny" is now available in paperback.

When Bob Tarte bought a house in rural Michigan, he was counting on a tranquil haven. Then Bob married Linda. She wanted a rabbit, which seemed innocuous enough until the bunny chewed through their electrical wiring. And that was just the beginning. Before long, Bob found himself constructing cages, buying feed, clearing duck waste, and spoon-feeding a menagerie of furry and feathery residents. His life of quiet serenity vanished, and he unwittingly became a servant to a relentlessly demanding family. "They dumbfounded him, controlled and teased him, took their share of his flesh, stole his heart" (Kirkus Reviews).

Whether commiserating with Bob over the fate of those who are slaves to their animals or regarding his story as a cautionary tale about the rigors of animal ownership, readers on both sides of the fence have found Tarte's story of his chaotic squawking household irresistible--and irresistibly funny.


Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Knowing little about animals, Tarte and his wife naievely acquire Binky, an impish bunny, at an Easter bunny fair, little suspecting that it will soon dominate their lives and lead to a brigade of other winged and furred beasts. After Binky, they get a canary, then Ollie, an orange-chin pocket parrot, whom they return because he flings his water-logged food all over their floor and accosts them with calls and bites. Then they buy a more docile gray-cheek parakeet, which makes the Tartes realize they miss their raucous friend Ollie, whom they retrieve. Gluttons for punishment, the Tartes acquire a gender-confused African gray parrot named Stanley Sue, followed by ducks, geese, turkeys, parrots, starlings, more rabbits and cats. Every day brings an adventure or a tragedy (Ollie escapes; a duck gets eaten by a raccoon) to their Michigan country house. With dead-on character portraits, Tarte keeps readers laughing about unreliable pet store proprietors, a duck named Hector who doesn't like water, an amorous dove named Howard, a foster-mother goose, patient veterinarians and increasingly bewildered friends. Tarte has an ordinary-Joe voice that makes each chapter a true pleasure, while revealing a sophisticated vision of animals and their relationship to humans.
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From School Library Journal

Adult/High School-A cast of characters listed in the front-along with all of the veterinarians consulted-helps to keep straight the bewildering number of animals, mostly avian and each with a personality of its own, that populates this amusing book. Newly married Michiganders Bob and Linda Tarte moved to the country per her desire, and soon she talked him into acquiring a rabbit to add to their two cats. Despite the bunny's bad attitude, one animal led to another, until there were more of them than you can shake a bird perch at. Tarte was sometimes hard-pressed to name them all, since they encompassed ducks, bunnies, cats, doves, canaries, turkeys, parrots, starlings, geese, and parakeets. While teens might not want to own any of these noisy and often bad-tempered beasts, reading about their foibles-and the foibles of the people from whom they were acquired-is great fun, thanks to the author's sly sense of humor and willingness to poke good-natured fun at himself, his wife, and their menagerie. Potential pet owners who think that caring for one or two animals would be a walk in the park will find this book extremely useful reading. In fact, they might have second thoughts about a trip to the pet store. Other readers will chuckle at the situations presented, and pet owners will no doubt identify with them.
Judy McAloon, Potomac Library, Prince William County, VA
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

Product Details

  • File Size: 492 KB
  • Print Length: 320 pages
  • Publisher: Algonquin Books (October 1, 2004)
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B004BLIH0Y
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #70,459 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
103 of 106 people found the following review helpful
Format:Hardcover
Bob Tarte's Enslaved By Ducks is a laugh-out-loud funny, beautiful, and insightful book about how he and his wife Linda live with and care for their vast menagerie of animals in rural Michigan. This book was in the Staff Picks section of the bookstore and I'm so glad I plunked down the hardcover price. The entertaining and often touching tales of Bob's life with a seemingly endless number of animals brought lots of smiles to my face and even had me afraid to read this book in public. You never know when you're going to bust out laughing with this one, but I'd estimate that once on every page is a fairly good guess. If you've ever toyed with the idea of starting your own Noah's Ark, here's your reality slam. Don't get that third, fifth, or tenth pet without reading this book first!
It started innocently enough with a bunny named Binky. Being a bunny slave to two angelic/demonic lagomorphs myself, I found it perfectly fitting that his story should start with a bunny rabbit. Rabbits hypnotize their owners into believing that they must acquire more rabbits, and where it stops no one can say. There are animal tales aplenty here with a strong emphasis on the avian variety. Parrots, ducks, turkeys, geese, starlings, you name it. If birds are your fancy, you definitely don't want to miss this read.
Individuals who struggle with depression will also find a kindred spirit here, as Bob openly shares his experiences with depression and how the daily routine of caring for all his animals affected him for the better.
Every side of being a devoted pet owner is represented here, including the sadness and grief when a special pet dies or when pets suddenly abandon their posh digs for the call of the wild.
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48 of 48 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars turkicidal turkeys and homicidal parrots June 13, 2005
Format:Paperback
Do you ever read a book and find yourself saying over and over again, 'I wish I wish I wish I had written this.' I wish I had written "Enslaved by Ducks" (well, I'd have to call it 'Enslaved by Cats.') It is both hilarious and touching: a sort of "Ring of Bright Water" as authored by Dave Barry; except it's not about otters. It stars the eponymous ducks, along with surly parrots, turkicidal turkeys, parrotophobic cats, starving baby starlings, duck-eating raccoons, woodwork-munching rabbits, and the occasional long-suffering veterinarian--I love the way this author lists all of his vets by name at the front of the book, along with hints about their practice: "prescriber of questionable ointments;" "doesn't do turkeys;" "'So you've been bad-mouthing our practice.'"

Author, Bob Tarte never meant to end up with a menagerie, but when he and his valiant wife, Linda moved to an old farmhouse near Lowell, Michigan (hold up your right hand and point vaguely at that sort of sinkhole in your palm, way beneath your ring finger), the inevitable occurred. Linda was an animal lover, and they now had lots of property and a barn.

Binky, the Dutch rabbit with no social skills was first. "Wouldn't it be fun to have a little animal hopping around the house," asked Linda, and after a long and futile (and funny) argument from the not-so-animal-loving Bob, in hopped their first tenant--and not into the drafty barn.

I used to think rabbits would be a cinch to own, until a friend of mine ended up with two from the local animal shelter. Bob made the same belated discovery, but by then his wife was on a roll.
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38 of 38 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Pure Pleasure For Animal Lovers May 20, 2004
Format:Hardcover
Bob Tarte has eloquently captured the animal lover's viewpoint in this hilarious and touching book about coexisting with our furry and feathered friends. Initially beginning with one tyrannical rabbit, Binky, and eventually growing into a menagerie of rabbits, ducks, geese, turkeys, cats, parakeets, and assorted other creatures, Tarte relates all the joys and tribulations of being an animal lover. The relationships between the animals (especially the birds) are wonderfully recreated, as is the relationship between himself (and his wife) and all the animals. The joy of discovery when a new animal is brought into the fold (and the humorous exploits of accommodating all of them), the amazing scheduling impacts of all the animals on their lives, and the harsh reality of coping with the loss of a beloved animal are all poignantly told in a manner that makes it hard to put the book down.
I am a diehard animal lover, but my hat is off to the Tartes for the patience and love they show daily to their huge multi-specied zoo. I highly recommend this book for anyone who loves animals!
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24 of 25 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A book that is laugh out loud funny... November 11, 2003
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
?Enslaved by Ducks? is extremely funny. Funny books are a rarity. Bob Tarte joins the ranks of Bill Bryson and Ian Frazier as one of the very few writers who can elicit belly laughs not bookish titters. What sets ?Enslaved by Ducks? apart from other humorous works is that it does not rely on an unusual setting, celebrity, or wacky characters. Bob Tarte focuses on how truly hilarious the mundane can be. ?Enslaved by Ducks? is no mere mawkish animal book but an odyssey of a man whose enjoyment of life grows from talking to Muffin the Dog through a vacuum cleaner hose to accommodating a menagerie of creatures from many genus including hominids. It is an exquisite piece of writing.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious AND it stands up to multiple reads
The only book I've read and re-read more than Enslaved by Ducks is the Bible.

Certain parts of it just never stop being funny, even after having been read ten times or... Read more
Published 2 days ago by Barreleh
5.0 out of 5 stars Enslaved by Hilarity
Enslaved By Ducks is one of the most charming books I’ve read in the past decade. Author Bob Tarte could have been married to any one of a dozen best friends of mine in the avian... Read more
Published 17 days ago by Fantasy Author Sandy Lender
2.0 out of 5 stars Sorry, it's dull
The author clearly thinks we should all be amused at the complications of a household full of bunnies, parrots, ducks, etc, that don't all have comic book personalities. Read more
Published 18 days ago by rsd22
5.0 out of 5 stars A Mutinous Menagerie in Michigan
Bob and Linda Tarte are as special and lovable as their neurotic pets. From breakfast rituals to bedtime rituals, their lives are (hilariously) directed by the idiosyncrasies and... Read more
Published 20 days ago by Teresa Willett
5.0 out of 5 stars I just Loved this!!
I could really relate with the author... I also ended up with ducks, chickens and even a goose..... they are entertaining, messy, annoying and endearing!!!
Published 2 months ago by Shirley Cola
4.0 out of 5 stars pretty good
When I started this book I didn't think I was going to like it, boy was I wrong . A good read
Published 3 months ago by Dr Skeeter
3.0 out of 5 stars Surprised
From the reviews and description, I thought I would enjoy the book more. It did not 'flow' like I thought it would. It was okay.
Published 3 months ago by K. Jones
3.0 out of 5 stars The Egg and I it is not.
It's funny in spots, but monotonous in others. I finish books if I can, but this one is easy to put down.
Published 3 months ago by M. Schumacher
5.0 out of 5 stars I Like To Call Myself A Public Servant.....
I Like To Call Myself, more accurately, A Public Servant..... of the Ducks that Allow me to be in their lives.... Read more
Published 4 months ago by Violet Skye
5.0 out of 5 stars You got to tea d thi s
A great true animal and human family who is combined in a lovable, funny, moving true life story. You becme a part of Bobs world and don't want to leave it. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Diane Smith
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