Equality: The Quest for the Happy Marriage (Happy Relationships) [Kindle Edition]

Tim Kellis (Author)

Book Description

Finally, the breakthrough you have been looking for. In this groundbreaking book Wall Street analyst and author Tim Kellis takes you on a journey through time to not only help you discover yourself but understand how to build and keep a lifelong happy, healthy, harmonious, loving, affectionate, intimate marriage. Not only will you learn how to build a positive relationship, what turns that relationship negative but how to change the course of the negative relationship back to where you were at the beginning, back when your life changed forever.

Most importantly, you will learn the greatest lesson, and that is why, why should two people who fall in love and decide to spend the rest of their lives together learn to build a loving home. Unfortunately, as society has developed we have lost our way in the most important part of each of our lives, our families. Just because we have a 50% divorce rate doesn’t mean that we should sit back while countless families go through one of the most painful experiences imaginable.

Renowned Wall Street analyst Tim Kellis takes on what could be considered society’s biggest problem today, divorce. The journey that led him to tackle such a significant issue was both personal and professional.

After a successful career that eventually landed him on Wall Street as the first semiconductor analyst to focus on the communications market Tim met what he thought was the girl of his dreams, only to see his relationship end with bitterness and anger. The journey included working with a marital therapist, and after he realized the therapist wasn’t really helping decided to tackle the issue himself.

The journey you are about to embark includes a trip through history, where the most significant lessons civilization has learned over the last few thousand years are used to demonstrate not only the way to set up a positive relationship, but the causes of that relationship turning negative.

Additionally, Tim dives into the science of psychology to answer the most basic question anyone asks who goes through the pain of divorce, “why didn’t we work out”?

The basic premise of the book is that we have a 50% divorce rate yet there doesn’t appear to be anything happening to help solve this problem. Just because divorce has become a significant part of our culture doesn’t mean we should simply sit back while countless families suffer through the agony of splitting up.

The toll to society tomorrow because of our culture of divorce today is impossible to determine but future generations will have to deal with this change to the culture that has occurred over the last two generations.

For the first time in history Tim will elaborate on a psychological solution to our psychological problems so that couples can learn how to change the direction of their negative relationships. In essence, the psychological objective is to understand what happens mentally between two people who make one of the most important decisions of their lives, to get married.

The objective of this book is to provide real, logical help to couples so that they can learn how to stay out of the divorce trap. Good luck on your journey as you learn how to set up your relationship so that you can maintain a happy, healthy, harmonious, loving, affectionate, intimate marriage.

Editorial Reviews

Review

With over half of American marriages ending in divorce, successful marriage seems more of a fantasy than reality. "Equality: The Quest for Happy Marriage" is a guide from someone who has experienced marriage much like everyone else in the world by simply doing it. Giving tips on how to improve one's marriage and retain both participants' happiness, harmony, and health, "Equality" is a seminal guide to anyone who wants to make sure their marriage will work. A top pick for community library relationship collections. --Midwest Book Review

Book reviewer Jacqueline Jung says the disintegration of a love affair sent relationship author Tim Kellis on a quest to figure out why-as well as how he could ultimately experience a blissful relationship.

According to Jung's review published this week in NightsAndWeekends.com, Kellis found some answers and proceeded to write EQUALITY: The Quest for the Happy Marriage.

And why not? Jung writes in her book review. According to Kellis, today's psychologists just don't get it. They don't address the reasons behind feelings and behavior, nor do relationship books written by 'experts.' They aren't logical. In the court case of the United States vs. Microsoft, the discussion always stayed logical. Accordingly, successful resolution of disagreements doesn't come from arguing but from coming up with a common sense solution. You see, the key to a successful relationship is common sense. It's that simple... at least to Kellis, she writes.

In his 400-plus-page book, readers learn history lessons about everything from Adam and Eve to Thomas Paine's Common Sense to Hitler and even Matthew Perry, said Jung. Kellis covers religion, prejudice, Freud, the evolution of today's education, and Carl Jung.

In EQUALITY: The Quest for the Happy Marriage, author Kellis talks about his own quest to discover the root causes of rocky relationships for which the fault is not be in our stars, but in ourselves.

--NightsandWeekends.com

About the Author

Why is knowledge of mathematics important to understanding relationships? Almost without exception, observed the great 20th Century philosopher Bertrand Russell in his exhaustive study of the history of Western philosophy, modern Platonists are ignorant of mathematics, in spite of the immense importance Plato attached to arithmetic and geometry, and the immense influence that they had on his philosophy.

Russell aptly sums up why modern psychology has been remarkably unable to grapple with the very human struggle of modern relationships. Tim Kellis calls today s relationship gurus Freudian failures as one out of every two marriages are dissolving in divorce. The approach by Dr. Phil and others is merely psychological and intuitive, when what s required is a more analytical and scientific evaluation of the philosophy in human relationships we call happiness.

According to Kellis, mathematics is the very basis for science as well as a prerequisite for understanding logic and philosophy. A student of mathematics and engineering, as well as a brilliant Wall Street analyst, he tells his clients: Happiness is a philosophy not a psychology. The ability to comprehend the causes of relationship struggles requires the skill to analyze, comprehend and then write, he says. His mathematically derived analytical skills provide the foundation for his ability to find the relationship solution that can save marriages.

For Kellis, writing this book has been a life experience involving his professional and personal life, as well as his imposing intellectual and emotional development, that has led him to understand how to make a relationship work.

Too often I ve heard I d rather be happy and single, than unhappy and married. Yet my parents taught me that divorce was not an option in life, something they taught me not by what they said, but by how they lived. They had a very unhappy relationship for a very long time, but they stayed married. The only reason I was able to come to understand how to make a relationship successful is because I was able to overcome my own childhood shortcomings, forgive my parents and see them for who they really were--my parents.

Ambition and a strong aptitude for math helped lead Kellis to discover how to make relationships work. His math skills led directly to an engineering degree, nine years in the telecommunications industry, an MBA in finance, and finally on to Wall Street, where he became the very first semiconductor analyst to focus on the communications market.

As an analyst you are required to be an expert in your field. The research completed before writing Equality: The Quest for the Happy Marriage was pursued in the same fashion as that required before becoming an analyst. The search for the truth requires a critical mind.

After publishing a 300-page initiation piece entitled Initiating Coverage of the Semiconductor Industry: Riding the Bandwidth Wave, Kellis became a leading semiconductor analyst at one of the biggest firms on Wall Street. As an analyst, he was in constant contact with investors, honing his presentation skills to the point that he became an expert presenter, a skill he believes is essential in his new role as relationship advisor. The experience he gained as a Wall Street analyst provided an excellent backdrop for researching and writing a book on relationships. As an analyst he had to deal with many egos, some healthy, some not. During this time, he learned why corporations and systems functioned at their best or worst and today applies much of what he learned to smaller, more intimate systems embodied in relationships.

Product Details

• File Size: 723 KB
• Print Length: 414 pages
• Page Numbers Source ISBN: 0979984807
• Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
• Publisher: Gilgamesh Publishging; 1st edition (December 15, 2007)
• Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
• Language: English
• ASIN: B001NMTCWQ
• Text-to-Speech: Enabled
• X-Ray: Not Enabled
• Lending: Enabled
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,163,905 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

3 of 3 people found the following review helpful

3.0 out of 5 stars Frat boy comes close to getting married at age 36 to an older woman and before the wedding he figured out she'd be high maintena May 12, 2009

By Marci Twain

Format:Hardcover

This book was just OK. It's one of those relationship books. It was kind of long and longwinded. The print was small, the pages were not tiny, but they were not huge either. Total pages came to 440 including the appendix material. I suppose I'm glad I read it. But I'm not sure. It included the following eight chapters:

1. The origination of the relationship
2. The foundation of the relationship: Common sense
3. The fork in the road
4. The development of the mind: Thoughts & feelings
5. Psychology: Biology or psychology
6. A psychological solution: Cognitive character therapy
7. Why? Why should relationships work?
8. Final thoughts

When I finished reading this book I felt as though there were four books chomping at the bit hidden in this one book:

>>The Author's Quest for a Happy Marriage
>>Happiness & Being at Peace with Yourself
>>Relationships and Insecurities that Threaten Relationships
>>Psychology & Therapists: Incompetent & Lazy

The first book is the one I thought I was going to read when I started. Unfortunately the other three books included got in the way. And I lost track of what the first book was really about. The second and third books kind of related to each other. And I think each could have been beefed up a little and made into fine books in their own right. Of course, they could have been combined into a coherent book and it would have been a good read, too.

The inclusion of the fourth book's material is what really killed this book for me. There was way too much included on self-help book authors, their quirks, their failings, and all that. And all that stuff about Carl Jung? Please!!! Clearly it appears that the marriage counselor the author worked with in his quest for a happy marriage wronged him. And I agree that there is a lot of incompetence, laziness, and quackery in the psychology profession. But I think the coverage included in this book went a little overboard.

I would have liked this book much more if it had been subjected to a good editing and cut down to a reasonable size. I think there was a place for the content in "books" 2 to 4 in the main book. But it needed to be kept in check so the main book could flow logically and succinctly. Also, the author went overboard on his use of exclamation points throughout the text. 3.5 stars!

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful

5.0 out of 5 stars Unique, Inspirational & Educational! April 18, 2009

By Geraldine Ahearn TOP 1000 REVIEWERVINE™ VOICE

Format:Hardcover

"EQUALITY" by author Tim Kellis is not a book that's based on research
to aid in counseling for married couples. It is not a novel that's focused on the opinion of psychologists, psychiatrists, and experts who
have worked with failing marital relationships. It is not a book based
on the opinion of religious experts who assisted couples during troubled
times. Experience,combined with intense research on the increasing divorce rate in the United States explained by Tim Kellis is what "EQUALITY" is all about. He describes the true meaning of happiness,
and the fine line between love, and hate. According to the author, and
experts who worked with hundreds of couples that were seeking professional advice to prevent divorce will all agree that two factors
are essential for every successful marriage. After working in the health
field for thirty years, along with observation of numerous couples who
filed for divorce, I agree that these two factors make up the golden key
to marital happiness. One lesson lived and learned through experience
is that we must face the nightmares in our past, bury them, forgive and
move on. If we choose to go on, pretending that our past was wonderful,
we will indeed transfer that pain onto the people we love dearly. The
second crucial lesson, and golden key to walk through the door of marital
happiness is that we must first be happy with ourselves. If we are unhappy with ourselves, and don't face hauntings from our past, then we
will walk into a new relationship, unintentionally transferring unhappiness and blame onto our partner. The months and years will pass
as sadness, hatred, and ambivalent feelings begin to grow like wildflowers. The final result will end in divorce, even though this is
not what the couples wanted, even if love does still exist. The damage
created unintentionally most of the time is not mended, it builds up,
and the couples have nothing left to hold onto, except sorrowful memories that resulted in departure. I recommend this novel to all
married couples, and to those who enter into a new relationship.
"EQUALITY" dives deep into the conscious, and unconscious, directing
the reader to how the mind works, and the impact of insecurities that
may be hidden for years. This novel is a unique, self-help book that
shines light on the beauty of love as viewed in "Love Story." It makes
the reader think of appropriate solutions and prevention of divorce
with a positive attitude, rather than direct the reader's attention to
negative aspects as viewed in War Of The Roses, or Gone With The Wind.
In comparison to the work of Dr. Sigmund Freud on his conclusion that
there's no where to go with our troubles with no solutions, current
research has proven this hypothesis to be untrue. I agree with Tim Kellis, and based on the work of Dr. Carl Jung that insecurities can in
fact be corrected, resulting in a healthy, happy marriage. Statistics
have noted that most health professionals, including myself, agree that
prevention and happiness is the best medicine of all!

Geraldine Ahearn AIOM HonDG (IBC)
Founding Member ABI Women's Review Board
CCRN/ author of 6 books

2.0 out of 5 stars All over the place February 22, 2013

By S. Behringer

Format:Kindle Edition|Amazon Verified Purchase

This book was insightful and interesting. It is more like a memoir at first and then ends as a psychological analysis. I think the author never got over his girl friend but what I believe he failed to realise is she really was not that into him. He thought it had to do with her past but I think the gal just didn't like him as much as he loved her even from the beginning. I gave this book a low rating because of the typos and the need for editing. However this was actually an enjoyable read. I now want to read more about Carl Jung. This book allows you to be very introspective.