Customer Reviews

Erotic Surrender: The Sensual Joys of Female Submission

5 star:		(6)
4 star:		(3)
3 star:		(3)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(4)

 

 

While this may be the only book out there for submissive women by a submissive woman, it isn't the best book for submissives. There are two books here really. The first looks at SM as a romantic experience where the focus is on the sexuality, especially of the woman. There is a lot of advice on what a woman can do to get herself into the mood and determine what works for her; not much advice on actually serving another person. The other book is scattered about and looks at SM as a means for heightened states of consciousness but without a lot of practical advice. Overall for men and women who see submission as an sexual exploration, it is a pretty good book. For anyone looking for advice on how to be submissive however, this book does not really address issues of service you may be looking for. The book is fairly different from her guide for dominant women but both books really focus on the needs and desires of the bottom partner and not on service.

After having read, and loved, Claudia's first book, "The Art of Sensual Female Dominance," I couldn't wait to read "Erotic Surrender." And it was well worth the wait. Claudia is a woman who writes specifically for women and she speaks to them from the depths of her s/m heart. This wonderful book is not for men, or for those who are already at ease with their submissive sides; rather it is clearly written for the vanilla woman who is seeking a better understanding her submissive desires.
"Erotic Surrender" fully succeeds in that goal. Claudia's writings left no doubt in my mind that she lived these experiences and loved them. I found her willingness to share the most intimate details of her submissive relationship with her British master to be truly remarkable; she exposed her soul to us in a way many others would not have the courage or insight to do. I especially loved the story entitled "Bride of the God", in "Masochism," chapter nine.
This book receives my highest recommendation.

Keep in mind, Claudia Varrin is a switch, however shares many of her experiences as a submissive throughout this book. I thought it was a good read into the realm of D/s. This is not an extraodinaire "how-to" manual, but provides a good foundation and simple ideas in pleasing your Dom/me. As you read Ms. Varrin's experiences, you will find much of her service to be impractical for today's hectic society unless you are able to devote yourself as a full-time, in-home submissive (without children, without pets, without other responsibilities) which many of us are unable to do. Submission is a lifestyle AND a mindset and it is up to you to decide where you and your Dom/me want to take it, then discover ways to integrate into your everyday lives. Considering there is limited literature available for female submissives, all in all, this is a good introduction and recommended for those looking to explore the lifestyle.

If you want a peek into a woman's mind who enjoys flights of submissive fantasy, you might like this book. Perhaps the author should consider writing romance novels featuring D/s themes.

As I read I began to believe that the author is not particularly sexually sophisticated. Her distaste for and confused descriptions of oral and anal sex were odd notes for someone purporting to be well-versed in erotic submission.

There were some jarring notes which set off alarm bells in my mind when dealing with her relationship with her Lord as well. I understand there is a sad lack of material written by submissive women for submissive women, but I do not think this book is a good introduction to the topic though it has provided fodder for discussion between my partner and myself. On that level it's a success, but that really isn't why I bought this book. Disappointing.

From the reviews available i was expecting something more than i got from this author. It was one of the few books available that was written by a submissive woman. While the book may be great for people just discovering they are submissive, there isn't much there for someone who is already actively exploring the lifestyle. One thing that was confusing for me, is that almost throughout the book, she gives advice that i intrepret as topping from the bottom. This is something my Master doesn't allow, as it undermines the entire basis of the relationship. There is virtually no information in it about service or what to do with the struggles that inevitably occur when the submissive must chose between embracing her submission or her vanilla thinking .

There's a disturbing belief I see often in online BDSM forums, to the effect that a submissive who enjoys him- or herself in any way in a BDSM context is not a "true" submissive. According to these folks, a "true" submissive is one who doesn't enjoy anything about the lifestyle but only participates because it's her duty as a slave. I HATE HATE HATE this mindset and that's part of why I wanted to read _Erotic Surrender_. I'd heard that it was mainly focused on the submissive's pleasure rather than on her slave duties. I figured it would be good to have another book, similar to _The Bottoming Book_, that dealt with both the pleasure aspects and the service aspects without stating that the submissive must be a complete doormat.

What I found here was, for the most part, not bad. I could see this being a good book for someone new to the lifestyle, someone just coming to terms with her submissive desires and not sure what to do with them. The soft-focus cover is nonthreatening, which could lead someone to pick this book up when they might not have chosen a book with similar content but with whips and chains on the cover. The book also provides tips for gently leading the partner you already have into your fantasy. It covers the basics about safety, scene etiquette, role-playing (there is a BIG focus on role-playing), and alternate states of consciousness. All of this is written with passion. It's obvious throughout the book that Claudia Varrin loves what she is doing and her enthusiasm shows through.

That said, I need to invite my favorite high school English teacher to visit Varrin, to have a little chat with her about paraphrasing. I'm not sure if I'd have noticed if I hadn't read _The Bottoming Book_ just before _Erotic Surrender_, but Varrin borrows whole chunks of prose from Easton and Hardy. She needs to put this stuff in her own words rather than using Easton and Hardy's.

I read this book, hoping it would be a good and indepth look at female submission within the sexual D/s context in general. What I got was what the author personally thought was arousing instead. Most of what she mentions in this book (ie. tips on what to do, wear, how to behave) isn't helpful and it must be realized that such things are highly individualistic. What works for one won't work for all.

I also found the fantasies she mentions in this book of poor taste. I'm not one for racially "Othering" and "exoticizing" people and I resent that she does this in the book (I'm thinking of the Middle Eastern Man against "milky white skin" fantasies). This was written very much from the perspective of a particular white female submissive, and that's what you get, her limited (and unenlightened) perspective. Not helpful.

As an "interested", I was looking for some books to get more serious and realistic information about the BD/SM culture and what the various practices really were (not what I imagined them to be). This book I found to be very well written by a woman who obviously know what she's talking about. She explains things in clear, simple, real and easy to understand language, and shares her own experiences. Through this book I was able to understand much more about this life-style, and about my own fascination with it. It helped to relativate some of my own misperceptions and prejudices and to understand more what was going on within myself. I recommend this book highly to those interested in learning more about this lifestyle. Very helpful!!!

I can't tell you how this book has changed my life. After years of harming myself - cutting my arms with razors and other self mutilations, I have been able to stop. How? Merely by putting myself in the hands of someone else who knows how to bring my body and soul to the brink and take me back safely. Someone who gives discipline to all aspects of my life.

I found this to be a meticulous exploration of chivalrous female submission right down to what shoes to wear and what words to say. It includes a very enlightening epilogue about how BDSM can lead to greater spiritual awareness. I felt it all made very enjoyable reading.