“Now in its third edition, this guide offers 22 chapters of witty, wise, and practical advice, covering everything from domestic partnerships and the concept of marriage to how to cope (e.g., being gay in a straight world). . . . This indispensable book also contains illustrations, inspiring photographs, and an extensive list of web resources.”
“A beautifully conceived and illustrated book that tackles every aspect of the wedding ceremony with humor and pride. . . . Tongue-in-cheek hyperbole is the hallmark of this thorough and witty guide, and traditional couples as well as gays will find its lighthearted yet seriously knowledgeable tone refreshing. . . . this book [is] as much a statement about gay life as it is a nontraditional wedding planner.”
—Patricia Holt, San Francisco Chronicle
“[The authors] answer with eloquence and wit the arguments that many gay activists have marshaled in opposition to gay and lesbians codifying their relationships in the same ways that straights do. . . . even the book’s most serious advice is generously larded with humor. . . . [Ayers and Brown] have left out none of the trappings.”
—Charles Isherwood, The Advocate
“A chatty, humorous compendium of traditions, advice, and wedding details geared for same-sex couples.”
“All you need is love—and this book—to have a great wedding.”
—Melissa Etheridge, musician and LGBT activist
“Everything you need to consider to plan the event of a lifetime—except the man or woman of your dreams.”
—Eric Marcus, author of Making History and Is It a Choice?
“Even the straight and single will get a kick out of this book! I found myself having lesbian-marriage envy!”
—Kathy Najimy, actor and writer
About the Author
has worked in advertising and graphic design, written for game shows, and was a producer on a number of television talk shows. When she and her partner Jane Anderson decided to have a wedding ceremony in 1992, they were unable to find a proper guide for gays and lesbians, and this book was conceived and born two years later. In the years since then Tess has been busy raising their son, now 17, and works on the boards of several not-for-profit organizations. Tess, Jane and Raphael happily divide their time between Los Angeles and Marin County.Paul Brown
has a BA in theater arts from Harpur College, Binghamton University. Over the years he has worked in theater (treasured every moment), a bit in television (not so much), and a stint in “celebrity journalism” (seemed like a good idea at the time). For the past fifteen years Paul has taught Special Education in Los Angeles. He met Tess Ayers several months before her wedding over two decades ago (then called a “commitment ceremony”). When the honeymoon was over, they collaborated on the first version of this book. Currently, Paul is working on a vocabulary and reading comprehension program for students with learning differences. He has never been married himself but he sure knows how to plan a wedding.