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Ethical Slut [Kindle Edition]

Dossie Easton
4.3 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (195 customer reviews)

Print List Price: $16.99
Kindle Price: $7.99
You Save: $9.00 (53%)
Sold by: Random House LLC

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Book Description


The essential guide for singles and couples who want to explore polyamory in ways that are ethically and emotionally sustainable.

For anyone who has ever dreamed of love, sex, and companionship beyond the limits of traditional monogamy, this groundbreaking guide navigates the infinite possibilities that open relationships can offer. Experienced ethical sluts Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy dispel myths and cover all the skills necessary to maintain a successful and responsible polyamorous lifestyle--from self-reflection and honest communication to practicing safe sex and raising a family. Individuals and their partners will learn how to discuss and honor boundaries, resolve conflicts, and to define relationships on their own terms.

"I couldn't stop reading it, and I for one identify as an ethical slut. This is a book for anyone interested in creating more pleasure in their lives . . . a complete guide to improving any style of relating, from going steady to having an extended family of sexual friends." --Betty Dodson, PhD, author of Sex for One



Editorial Reviews

Review

"This book is the definitive guide to having your marriage and eating other people too. The Ethical Slut made me the ethical slut I am today, and I am so proud!”--Margaret Cho, comedian and author of I’m the One That I Want

“The Ethical Slut is one of the most useful relationship books you could ever read, no matter what your lifestyle choices. It‚’s chock-full of great information about communication, jealousy, asking for what you want, and maintaining a relationship with integrity. An absolute masterpiece and a must-read!”--Annie Sprinkle, PhD, sexologist and author of Dr. Sprinkle's Spectacular Sex

“Many people wish for and dream of a wider world sexually and live out their lives unable to find the courage to explore. This book is a thoughtful, practical, and loving look at that exploration.”--David Crosby, musician and author of Since Then

“The Ethical Slut, in this new and expanded edition, is the definitive guide for creating and sustaining all conscious relationships‚Äîpolyamorous, open, alternative, and monogamous. Don’t enter into another relationship without it!”--Barbara Carrellas, author of Urban Tantra

“Dossie and Janet’s blend of good humor and forthright honesty makes for some of the best writing I have found on sexually complicated relationships and blended family options. Engaging, disarming, forthright‚ this is the book for those of us still brave enough to make the ethically complex choices.” --Dorothy Allison, author of Bastard Out of Carolina

“A useful guidebook for radical relationship travelers . . . experienced counsel to those on the polysexual frontier.” --Ryam Nearing, Loving More magazine

“A post-graduate course in ethical relationships of every stripe. The authors pull no punches and are totally outrageous. . . . You’ll never be bored.” --Stan Dale, DHS, founder of the Human Awareness Institute

“Frank, funny, and full of practical advice . . . life-saving validation, empathy, and plenty of insider tips from the experienced big sisters you probably weren’t fortunate enough to have.” --Deborah Anapol, PhD, author of Polyamory: The New Love without Limits

From the Publisher

* The essential guide for singles and couples who want to explore polyamory in ways that are ethically and emotionally sustainable.
* Revised and updated throughout, with new strategies for single sluts, advice for opening an existing relationship or marriage, and exercises for thinking about and discussing open relationships.

Product Details

  • File Size: 3263 KB
  • Print Length: 299 pages
  • Publisher: Celestial Arts; 2nd edition (April 20, 2011)
  • Sold by: Random House LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B004JHYRAE
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Lending: Not Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #14,852 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
251 of 278 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I write this review as someone who is extremely sympathetic to polyamory, has explored it in the past, and has made the choice that it is not something that would be ultimately as satisfying for me as monogamy.

I am delighted with certain aspects of the book that reframe abundant sexual expression in positive ways, promote honest, authentic, and safe relationships, and encourage people to explore with openness what is true for them. I also enjoy the "workbook" like nature of many of the inquiries, allowing many people to really make these ideas concrete in their own lives.

However, even upon re-reading this 2nd edition, I fundamentally disagree with too many of the underlying premises and the underlying energy of defensiveness throughout the book. Foremost is the underlying premise that monogamy isn't anything special, and that you can essential do everything you can do in monogamy with polyamory. The authors suggest quite explicitly in several places that monogamy is simply a more sexually repressed, unenlightened, and outdated version of a more supposedly spiritually mature polyamory. I find their arguments utterly unconvincing, overly simplistic, defensive, and often overstated.

I maintain that monogamy and polyamory are qualitatively different and should not be compared as if they were better or lesser versions of the same thing. They are both beautiful, both unique, and there is something special about both of them. They present qualitatively different challenges that are not the same. Monogamy inviting challenges that can ONLY come from unconditionally committing to be sexually exclusive with one person. Polyamory invites challenges that can ONLY come from unconditionally being open to letting love and sexual exploration flow as they arise.
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191 of 217 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing, essential book for all relationships April 24, 2009
Format:Paperback
The Ethical Slut is incredible!

I first read The Ethical Slut (first edition) as part of a college course. As an undergrad, I was already well on my way to being a proud slut - I did the usual versions of short-term college dating, hookups, friends-with-benefits, threesomes, and the like, with or without a committed partner at various times. It all felt natural and right, but there were invariably awkward moments of poor negotiation, misunderstood communication, and mis-handled jealousy.
When I read The Ethical Slut, I found an amazing wealth of information and suggestions on how I could make my various relationships work better and more smoothly. I wished I'd had this book all along - it would have saved so much trouble! If only I'd known that an agreement to "see other people" wasn't nearly complete enough! The Ethical Slut lays out all the things to think about in having open relationships of various sorts. I've been called a slut since I was 14, but it was this book that gave me the idea that being a slut could be a good thing - and now I couldn't be happier with my fabulous life as a proud slut.

The Ethical Slut is an entertaining, readable, real-life explanation of all the options in relationships. Whether you want to be single or partnered or grouped, poly or monogamous, or whatever else, this book helps you figure out all the possibilities better. It's THE relationship book for anyone who wants more options than a "leave-it-to-beaver" relationship.

If you're just starting to explore open relationships, or you're even just thinking about it, there's no better place to start than with this book. And if you're already immersed in poly life, it's got the "advanced level" information you need.
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212 of 265 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars 95% useless. February 2, 2012
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
My partner isn't just some guy I'm dating; we share a home together. We share our lives together. He's part of my FAMILY. A compendium of flippant personal opinions that lack scholarly/clinical/statistical backing, and a smattering of personal anecdotes from the authors' lives is NOT what I need to guide me through one of the more important decisions I'll make in my life.

Non-monogamy is hard work, especially for folks like us raised up in a society that is so biased toward monogamy... and so grossly misinformed about even the basics of non-monogamy. I actually have poly friends to look to for advice or as examples, but most folks don't. So most of us don't have anything to go on. And the thing is, even the most sincere, loving, caring, honest people can torpedo their relationship BY ACCIDENT, through totally innocent mistakes. I'm lucky enough just to know that from reading some excellently-written and informative websites--A million times more useful than this waste of a book. So many people have raved about The Ethical Slut, so I picked up a copy. I was LIVID before I could finish the first chapter, and I had to force myself to finish the rest of the book, just in case there was something--anything--of value amid the vapid, self-serving rubbish the authors present.

Speaking of chapter one, the authors even fail at justifying the concept of rehabilitating the word slut... they themselves say that one of the primary attributes given to the word "slut" is that a slut is indiscriminate... and then they blather on a bunch of nonsense without ever sorting that one *little* issue out.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars useful guide
I found this book very helpful as well as empowering, and would highly recommend it to single people. Read more
Published 2 days ago by dawn soleri
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Great book for everyone and every kind of a relationship!
Published 7 days ago by Katerina Kalacova
4.0 out of 5 stars Great in theory but I would personally find it unsettling ...
Definitely a different view on life. Great in theory but I would personally find it unsettling to know my wife has a diary and a roster for a whole series of lovers. Read more
Published 17 days ago by alan stops
5.0 out of 5 stars This is the best book I have read in years
This is the best book I have read in years. It has helped me embrace my life choices and not feel that I am wrong for feeling the way I do. Read more
Published 22 days ago by Kat
5.0 out of 5 stars great book.
Fast shipping, great book.
Published 24 days ago by Tamra J Wilkens
5.0 out of 5 stars Helps you out of the forest
A great book for anyone looking to broaden their views on traditional relationships. I felt a little lost because I did not fit in anywhere, and no one I knew lived this lifestyle... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Christine
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Recommend.
Published 1 month ago by L Carpenter
3.0 out of 5 stars Its a book of common sense honestly. That voice ...
Its a book of common sense honestly. That voice that nags you not to be a complete selfish jerk? Yeah same advice, just written down so maybe you will consider others feelings... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Robert Frazier
5.0 out of 5 stars Learn your capacity to love
Regardless of your status or approach to relationships, whether they be traditional heteronormative or alternative or even if you are an individual looking for a way to truly... Read more
Published 1 month ago by Evan Peter
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Great eye opening book that had cleared so many misconceptions
Published 1 month ago by Missy
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