The Evasion-English Dictionary [Paperback]

Maggie Balistreri (Author)

Book Description

Publication Date: October 26, 2003

What if you fired your shrink and hired a proofreader?

More than just a dictionary of euphemisms by a hip young linguist, The Evasion-English Dictionary is a merciless translation of the banalities of contemporary speech. It's also scathingly funny.

For example, Balistreri asks what if you substituted the word "you" for the phrase "the relationship" in the sentence, "There seem to be a lot of problems with the relationship." Or what if you substituted the word "because" for the word "but" in the sentence "They drive me crazy but my parents are very involved in my life."

Entertaining as it is, however, the E.E.D. is also a thought-provoking and insightful look into the twists and turns of modern English usage—a smart and useful, albeit hysterical, earwitness account of verbal mishaps and manipulations that's destined to become a classic with language lovers and a useful reference tool on the desk of writers everywhere.

Editorial Reviews

From Publishers Weekly

Cultural criticism takes the form of a dictionary in this slender, amusing volume. Balistreri has become aware-and wants to make us all aware-of the little linguistic games we play in order to "duck the truth," the words we use not to reveal our meaning but to mask it. Saying "I feel unproductive," she notes, is more acceptable to ourselves than plainly stating, "I am unproductive." Or how about "I hate to say it but..." (as in "I hate to say she's fat...")? Balistreri unearths the underlying meaning: "I can't believe I'm saying this; it's so uncharacteristic of me." Balistreri, who runs the language and poetry webzine CafeMo.com, is a subtle interpreter of linguistic evasions and rhetorical tics. Read this, and you may think twice the next time you're tempted to say "like" (translation: "think, brain, think!").
Copyright 2003 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From School Library Journal

Adult/High School-The author takes on the real meaning of "whatever," "like," "I think," and other common words and phrases that put spin on meaning and avoid honest communication. Arranged alphabetically, each entry includes a paragraph of explanation of the evasive word and suggests substitute definitions. There are more than one or two meanings for frequent words. "Whatever" has the most-they include the "apathetic" whatever, the "yeah so" whatever, the "who am I to judge" whatever, and the "faltering cliche" whatever. The word "like" also has several uses here, one of which is the staller. "Poetry, yeah me too. I love like Robert Frost." And "You're from Belize? That's like, South?" The word "think" is used to replace the more truthful "know." "I just wanted to explain and apologize for just up and leaving like that. I mean, I didn't want you to think I'm an asshole or something." Teens will recognize these speech evasions and excuses in everyday language and may be inspired to try out the blunt definitions in their own conversation and writing. Do these dodges promote civility or conceal the truth and promote sloppiness? This tiny, sturdy paperback will inspire debate and discussion in the cafeteria and the classroom.
Jackie Gropman, Chantilly Regional Library, VA
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

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Product Details

• Paperback: 88 pages
• Publisher: Melville House; 2nd edition (October 26, 2003)
• Language: English
• ISBN-10: 0971865973
• ISBN-13: 978-0971865976
• Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.3 x 7.2 inches
• Shipping Weight: 4 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
• Average Customer Review: 4.4 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,298,758 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

(Margherita) Maggie Balistreri was born in Brooklyn. She works as a special-collections librarian and naming consultant in New York.

Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

24 of 25 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars It's Funny Because It's True., October 29, 2003

By 

Erin McKean "the beleaguered author" (Chicago, IL United States) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)   

This review is from: The Evasion-English Dictionary (Paperback)

If your bedside table pile includes Bierce and Mencken, you'll want to add this book to the stack. It's a pleasurable skewering of evasive language (even when it's your evasions that are the ones, like, being skewered), done with such gorgeous logic and good humor that you DO feel the terrible urge to read bits of it out loud to those nearest and dearest to you. Ignore that urge and give those near and dear their own copies. (Just don't be surprised when they start to read aloud to YOU.)

18 of 18 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Witty, Funny, and Like, Right On!, January 11, 2004

By 

David (Irving, Texas, United States) - See all my reviews
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Amazon Verified Purchase

This review is from: The Evasion-English Dictionary (Paperback)

In this witty and extremely funny little book, Maggie Balistreri, has been able to step back and listen, really listen, to not only what we, as a culture, are saying, but how we say it, and bring it all home, to our attention.

Balistreri not only has provided humorous examples of office-speak, relationship banter, parenting jibberish, and teen-speak, but she makes you think about what you are saying, really.

Two of my favorite sections are "whatever" and "like." I had no idea there were that many different meanings attached to the word "whatever." And, "like" is my favorite pet peeve of today's English.

The book is such a delightful read, I could hardly put it down, and was unable to resist reading passages to my friends, especially those whose speach patterns were found in the book.

The book was so enjoyable, I could not resist a second read as well.

Well worth your time and money.

19 of 20 people found the following review helpful:

5.0 out of 5 stars Fun and Profound, October 13, 2003

By A Customer

This review is from: The Evasion-English Dictionary (Paperback)

At first glance this book may seem to be just another funny little mock dictionary. It is funny, and it is a little mock dictionary of sorts. But when you sit down and start reading it, you begin to realize that it's much much more. Balistreri has written a subtle, sophisticated and clever commentary -- that's very fun to read -- on how we use the simplest and most benign-seeming words to evade the truth. Not so much to lie to others as to lie to ourselves, to lie about ourselves and what we're truly thinking.

We all know that we don't always say what we mean, but Balistreri shows just how often we do this -- more often than you think! -- and how often these (self-)deceptions lurk behind our use of the basic elements of language. Happily, Balistreri presents these thought-provoking revelations in a highly entertaining, bitingly humorous way. This is the kind of book that's so smart and funny that you'll repeatedly have the urge to read passages aloud to the nearest victim.