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Most of the myths she includes are about relationships, as in "you will know when you have met 'the one,'" and "your lover should be your best friend." In the "Never Go to Bed Mad," chapter, she denounces the practice of "venting": "The idea is that, like a vent, you can let hot air out and make the temperature cooler. But what scientists find is that anger builds up more anger," fostering "the kind of adrenalized conversation that encourages couples to say things that they never should say."
Schwartz's Ph.D. seems to be in pragmatism. In the chapter "Everyone Should Cohabit Before Marriage," she warns, "If you eventually hope for marriage, don't live together for over a year. Let's get real. You know everything you need to know by then, and if you think you don't, you are kidding yourself." And on lusting after someone other than your partner: "Attractions are more often an artifact of the circumstances than of the person--and so many people can be fascinating for a short period of time."
Whether on flirting or fantasizing, each chapter reads like a quickie column (she's written for Glamour and Playboy), and superficial advice is all she can squeeze into a few pages on such heavy topics as infidelity. While this is not a deeply analytical look at complex issues, it would be helpful for anyone just beginning to challenge longstanding relationship assumptions, or wanting to reconfirm values and ideals. --Rebecca Taylor --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
This good book on relationships is a refreshing view of many of the pathos that impede so much happiness and fulfillment. Read morePublished 7 months ago by Donald N. Powell
Much of the information contained in this book is useful, but there is updated information available, such as from John Gottman and othersPublished on July 5, 2013 by Amazon Customer
Pepper Schwartz, PhD
Everything You Know about Love and Sex is Wrong:
Twenty-five Relationship Myths Redefined
to Achieve Happiness and Fulfillment in Your Intimate... Read more
I love Dr. Schwartz. At the University of Washington in the `80s, she and Philip Blumstein did the definitive research on bi women and later wrote a great examination of married... Read morePublished on September 11, 2007 by SevenDelta
Not only is she a relationship expert but she knows how to write a captivating book and give you unique insight into your relationship, your partner and yourself. Read morePublished on August 18, 2003
The author is glib and self-satisfied in telling the over-60 set that their old-fashioned mores about sex are... well, old-fashioned. Read morePublished on February 12, 2003
I thought this book was insightful and funny. A great reminder not to take things too seriously and to enjoy relationships! A great book to read with your girlfriends! Read morePublished on October 13, 2000
At the age of 60, and in the 13th year of my 3rd marriage, (the first for 10 years and the second for 5 years), "Dr. Read morePublished on October 12, 2000