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Exploring spiritual direction: An essay on Christian friendship

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John Fortunato is both an experienced psychotherapist and a well-informed, deeply faithful Christian who has learned, through time and pain, the inviolable and unconditional love of the God who created him as a gay man and whose acceptance of him as such is total.

Blessedly free of technical, therapeutic jargon, Fortunato outlines his understanding of the process of psychotherapy as "grieving" and of the special need for gay men and lesbians to grieve the losses which started to accumulate even before the start of personal, individual memory. Movingly, he shares his own experiences as a gay man struggling to find a sense of spirituality in his life, and the many cul-de-sacs he encountered which left him angry, frustrated and feeling abandoned and damaged by Churches ( he was born Roman Catholic and is now, happily, a part of the Episcopal Church) where he sought healing and acceptance. Beautifully written and deeply felt, this is required reading for any gay person who has felt that there is no place for him/her at the table of the Lord. Fortunato has come to believe, as the title suggests, that it is only in "embracing" life in exile from the rest of the culture that we can find ourselves and the peace we seek. In doing this, we find not only the love of God, but companions for the journey, all of whom are also "In exile" and headed home to the heart of the love which created them and accepts them exactly as they are.