Customer Reviews

FORGOTTEN TEARS: A Grandmother's Journey Through Grief

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I bought this book for my husbands mother. She had a really hard time coping with the loss of our son. She felt like no one understood her and she herself could not understand some of her emotions. She would call me everyday to tell me what she had read and how similar the story was to ours. When she finished the book she seemed as if she understood now. She told me that we cant try to get over what happened but to interpret it into our lives.

Written by a bereaved grandmother who is also a healthcare professional (former childbirth educator and reproductive healthcare specialist, now working in the HIV/AIDS field), this is an intimate portrayal of her own grief journey following the unexpected stillbirth of her beloved granddaughter. The author manages to weave theoretical material about grief and mourning in and amongst her very private journal entries and personal experiences, which makes this work valuable not only to mothers and grandmothers but to mental health professionals as well. The book is clinically accurate and current, incorporating material from leading experts on bereavement as well as anecdotal experiences gathered from other bereaved grandparents, so that it will appeal to clinicians as well as members of the lay public. I especially appreciate how, through her own touching examples, this author gives bereaved families permission to keep the memory of their babies alive and to continue to develop a connection with them through the years. As Lorraine Hedtke so accurately observes (...), sadness is only one aspect of the complexity of grief, and remembering is what helps us manage our sorrow more effectively. I have listed this book on the pages of my Grief Healing Web site (...) as one I highly recommend to my site visitors, clients and colleagues.

Nina Bennett's book, Forgotten Tears, starts with her granddaughter Maddy's unexpected still birth. From this painful experience, she ultimately offers a sensitive and inclusive book on the subject of personal grief. She highlights a topic not often discussed: How grandparents' grief over the death of a grandchild is indeed sometimes forgotten, even though their grief is arduous.

The author artfully shares her struggle with grief until a sense of renewal reigns. Bennett is passionate about giving her grief meaningfulness to herself as well as helping others find their path alng the grief journey.

Included are individual stories, and suggestions to permit grief to forge character through redefining normal. Anyone experiencing loss of a loved one will benefit from this foundational book on grief. Excellent bibliography and resource section.

Judy Martin-Urban, author of I Can't Remember Me, inspirational nonfiction LangMarc Publishers May 2006 www.judeurbanski.com

Nina Bennett is a social services and healthcare professional who turned her deepest grief into something that helps others who have gone through or are going through the loss of a loved one. She wrote this book because she couldn't find many resources that focused on bereaved grandparents. She wanted to create something to help other grandparents who experience the devastating loss that she went through. This book has much to offer not only to grandparents, but also to anyone grieving the loss of a loved one. It takes a brave and special person to be able to share something so deeply painful and personal with the public. And by doing so, Ms. Bennett memorialized her beloved granddaughter forever. This book is highly recommended.

Forgotten Tears: A Grandmother's
Journey Through Grief
by Nina Bennett
Booklocker.com
Genre: Autobiographical Grief Memoir
ISBN: 1591137640, $12.95, 144 pp, 2005

This book is about Nina Bennett's personal grief experience over the death of her granddaughter, Maddy Hodgdon, who died during childbirth. In this book she shares her knowledge as a healthcare professional (former childbirth educator and reproductive healthcare specialist) and she shares her inspiration as she works her way through the pain.

Nina wrote Forgotten Tears to help other grandparents with their personal grief while they try to help their bereaved child, and I think to help work through her own grief. Quoting from the back cover:

"Being a grieving grandparent means seeing your own child suffer and being powerless to help while experiencing the lack of support and understanding of your might-have-beens."

I personally don't dwell on "might-have-beens," for I see no point, except to make oneself unhappy, but who am I? Life goes on and so must we. Nina Bennett certainly makes it clear that grieving is a very personal thing with no time limits.

The author currently works in the HIV/AIDS field, where she has been employed since the beginning of the epidemic. She lectures and presents workshops, both locally and nationally, on the psychological aspects of living with HIV.

Reviewed by Kaye Trout - July 1, 2006 - Copyright