Customer Reviews

Family Squeeze: Tales of Hope and Hilarity for a Sandwiched Generation

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Family Squeeze by Phil Callaway is a hilarious look at the generation stuck between raising teens and taking care of their aging parents. Callaway, who has three children, took care of his parents as they got older, and in the beginning stages of his mother's Alzheimers. He tackles the struggles and joys of caring for the old and young with faith and humor. Having two teenagers myself, I related all too strongly to that portion of the book. Sons who eat you out of house and home, daughters who brush aside advice and rules with a condescending smile; Callaway relates it in a way that had me roaring with laughter. His stories about his parents were funny, sweet, and moving as well. The chapters are short anecdotes, easy to read for those with no time to read, but difficult to put down.

Phil Callaway has been called "the Dave Barry with a message." The label fits.

Humor, some tongue-in-cheek, some outright roll-your-eyes corny, some hysterical, blended with self-depreciation, or sadness, or loss fills chapter after chapter of a poignant read. Chicken soup flavored short segments with more humor and more hope, even for those not facing the exact situation of teens and adult parent squeeze that hits many mid-lifers.

Callaway met my expectations. Each story works as a stand alone and together paint a picture of a loving, nutty, respectful family. As a whole I'd describe Family Squeeze as less side-splitting hilarity and more humor that stops the reader and causes self-inspection, a flood of memories or a tiny fragment of hope.

Callaway honestly paints his life, not sparing himself from the harsh light of truth where his own flaws are concerned. The he whips around to a lesson that penetrates reader thoughts and attitudes.

Entertaining and uplifting words that stick. Family Squeeze is a book for caregivers, or those who need to laugh, or those who care to live a life that makes a difference.

As a female reader smack dab in mid-life, with retired parents and kids flying out of the nest, I was drawn to veteran author Phil Callaway's FAMILY SQUEEZE immediately. Best of all, it made me laugh.

As Callaway says, his book is for those of us in the "Middle Ages," or in the family "sandwich." I'm in my 40s, which, as Callaway says, likely means my husband and I have "The Eagles Greatest Hits" on cassette, LP record, eight-track, CD, mp3, your laptop and your iPod. Well, we gave away the LP. But his point is that at our age, we'll likely be caring for an in-law or parent at some point while adjusting to teens or watching our children become young adults. All this happens when we're having our own adjustments to middle age, unwanted hair loss and hair gain, and hot flashes. God does have a sense of humor.

Just as his parents began needing assistance, Callaway shares, his three children started becoming teens. "I suppose this is the microcosm of our lives the past few years. Dreaming. Dreading. Laughing. Answering the phone a little less eagerly. We are parenting two generations now, wedged between the demands of elderly dependents and energetic teens...." His short, funny chapters read like stand-up comedy routines --- more about personal stories than self-help.

On teens, Callaway advises: Do not compare yourselves with other parents who sit in church looking happy and well organized. "Chances are they are heavily medicated and hours from being institutionalized."

On aging parents: Callaway shares his dad's favorite saying: "If you can start the day without caffeine, live without complaining, eat the same food every day and be grateful, relax without liquor, and sleep without the aid of drugs, you are probably the family dog."

Cartoons sprinkled throughout the book offer more laughs. My favorite: a mother of screaming toddlers trying to have coffee with an elderly woman who is smiling and telling her, "Enjoy each moment...they grow up so fast." Who among us hasn't experienced this --- and resisted the urge to smack the person?

Callaway's serious advice mingles with the humor. How would you want to be treated as you age? Callaway moved his parents into a suite he built onto his house, but when Alzheimer's reared its head a few years later, and he had to take away his father's car keys, the decisions weren't so easy. Eventually, he shares, his parents needed 24-hour medical care. Readers who have been faced with the same sort of situations will relate. Callaway is honest in sharing his anguish at not being able to solve all the problems of caring for aging parents or, for that matter, parenting teens. He says he did the thing he knew how to, just taking the next step forward.

What's most engaging about Callaway's book are these personal anecdotes, mostly told with a light touch. But intermingled throughout are some solid tips for survival. On marriage: "Finding the right person... is less important than being the right person." About teens: Laugh a lot. Be Flexible. Help your kids think through making good decisions. Affirm. Stay connected. Most importantly, he reiterates in chapter after chapter to spend time with your teens, your parents and your spouse during the sandwich years.

Less successful, perhaps, are his stories about his struggles with money and success. They seem like padding, and I found them a dissonant note. This is also a book squarely aimed at married readers. It might also have been helpful if some of the chapters were directed towards single parents trying to cope with the same issues.

But if, between the midlife crisis, teenage children and aging parents, you discover that life is hard, Callaway says, "I doubt I have learned one solitary thing worth remembering that was not forged in the furnace of suffering." Because he's dealt with the issues he's writing about, his words have the ring of authenticity. Callaway is a good companion for married readers embarking on the sandwich years.

--- Reviewed by Cindy Crosby

I bought this book after reading the front and back covers - I thought it would be a funny book about life. Maybe I didn't do enough research on the author, etc.... but from the book covers it looked to just be a comedy.

I was totally turned off with all the religious comments. If I wanted to read a book about religion, I would buy a book about religion. When I am reading a comedy, I DO NOT want to be preached to!

WOW!! I read a few excerpts from this book, just after learning that this book shares the same name as my blog: [...]. To my surprise, I could relate entirely to this book, even though I am not part of the named generation. More and more, I am finding that the problems of our society are widespread and reaching all corners of our demographic composition. As "sandwiched" as the for-mentioned generation is, just imagine the ramifications to the subsequent generations who have experienced exponential displacement and dissatisfaction.

You can't go wrong with Phil Callaway. I've read a couple of his other books and have always enjoyed them.
He tells of his family life with such good humor. He tells of his love of God with sincerity. Thought provoking, fun, I know I'll read more from this author.

Phil Calloway is a man who knows the joys and heartaches of raising teenagers and caring for elderly parents. Family Squeeze is funny, touching, and heartwarming. I found myself nodding in agrement more than once, and I laughed out loud a few times. It even has cartoons. What can I say? I loved the book. Highly recommended.

Written in Phil's usual hilarious but "the way it is" style, I recommend it to anyone who's "sitting in the middle" of a multiple generation family. And, well, to just ANYONE, for that matter. GREAT reading.