Customer Reviews

Father-Daughter Incest (with a new Afterword)

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As a text about the 'whys' and ways of incest, this is among the best. It explains why children go along with the parent, why they do not report it, and in some cases, may even want to continue the sexual relationship once it has begun. This is hard for some to understand, but you need to remember that a child will accept what they perceive as love from a parent any way they can get it. This is one of the best texts on incests that i have read.

I think that there are three separate (and possibly overlapping) audiences for this book.

First, those professionals who work with incest survivors will find the results of knowledge gained from Dr Herman's experience studying this particular field of sexual abuse and working with those directly affected. Secondly, those who work with abuse victims in any care-giving capacity will find some guidance through the minefield of taboo and denial that tends to accompany this topic. Thirdly, this book is invaluable to some of the survivors who themselves can deal face the reality of the past while trying to understand that it isn't their fault and they are not necessarily alone in the conflicting feelings they have experienced.

Dr Herman's work in this area is well-presented and relatively easy to follow. By relying on facts, by incorporating case studies, and through referring to the history of the various incest taboos and practices, Dr Herman makes it easier for sufferers and caregivers alike to discuss the undiscussable.

One could wish that such studies were not necessary, and that no parent ever abused their position of power and authority. One could also wish that care and help was readily available to each child who has suffered at the time that the abuse was first experienced. By opening the topic to discussion and through publishing books which deal with behaviour in context and the consequences for individuals, families and communities, society is better equipped to help sufferers become survivors. Or so I hope.

Jennifer Cameron-Smith

Joyce Barrows, This book is an in depth detailed account of child molestation/incest and the ramifications of the act and the future of the child put under such a devestating stress. I personally am a fan of memoirs, enjoying the real more so than the imagined. This book offers the real life accounts of people when they were children and the pain that they must have had to endure. It is also a moving book, similar to that of Nightmares Echo by Katlyn Stewart and Beauty For Ashes by Joyce Meyers. Though this book is a bit more clinical

It is not easy reading. It is much like reading a textbook. However, it is very informative but very disturbing because the medical, phsyciatric, legal and law enforcement communities combined to ignore the evidence and blame the victims or not believe them. Disgusting profesional behavior for years and years. Your heart goes out to the victims. These little girls were not safe at home and either they were blamed or not believed. The emotional injuries last forever.

This book is a must read for anyone touched by this horrendous issue. Whether you are a victim or someone who works with victims. It is so important that people in charge of trying to keep our children safe understand the "operating procedures" of these sick people so they can better serve us all.

What a horrific thing for humanity!

This book will help you understand the child's secrecy and the typical long-term devastation of incest. A useful tool.

My own recovery from incest is detailed in my book, Suffering ~ A Path of Awakening: Dissolving the Pain of Incest, Abuse, Addiction and Depression.

Many Blessings on your path of healing and of supporting others.

This book was very good, helpful and useful. I'm keeping it in my study room as a tool to help me with my creative writing on the subject of sexual abuse.

Deeply disturbing to read, disquieting to have lying about in the house, but a hugely important book in terms of serving the women who have held their incest secrets for far too long. What are you going to do if/when someone close to you tells you their incest secret? This book will help you decide on an appropriate response. "Denial has always been the incestuous father's first line of defense" Herman notes. Will you believe the father or the daughter?
The author met Lisa Hirschman first in 1975 when they were beginning their clinical practice and saw multitudes of women who had experienced incest. Most of those women patients had remained silent. Herman and Hirschman credit the women's liberation movement with finally having changed our cultural bias to favor the victim. There are two traditional beliefs at play which favored the abuser: 1. He did no harm, he says, and 2. He was not to blame.
On the question of harm, sociologist James Ramey writing in a 1979 SIECUS newsletter, expressed more concern for the harm of official recognition and punishment of incest than for the act itself. Men's magazines continue to make this point as do those few psychoanalytic holdovers in the field of psychiatry. These arguments ignore the question of power in the parent-child relationship.
The authors do a good job of explaining the culture in terms of patriarchal domination. The homes studied were very traditional homes with full-time mothers. These mothers had spent a significant period of time being ill, were often separated from social supports, had larger families than average (3.6 children each), and experienced very little power in the domestic relationship. Often the fathers abused alcohol. Mothers and daughters were alienated. Almost all the fathers were feared in their homes; but viewed outside it, they were seen to be good-tempered, amiable, if not downright meek. These men knew they were least likely to be opposed in their own homes by their own daughters and exploited that reality. They were often charming to their daughters who felt like "Daddy's little princess."
The author discredits the psychoanalytic bias which had portrayed daughters as seductive. Homes with overt incest as well as homes with covert incest--seductive fathers who stopped short of intercourse--were often homes where rivalry existed between mothers and daughters for father's attention. Mothers and daughters were deeply alienated. My own reflexive response had been, `How could a mother not know?' which turns out to be the question the victims had as well. Herman came to the same conclusion as Karen Horney in stating that only when the women had overcome their bitterness towards their mothers could they respect women including themselves.
Read the book to learn how to get through the crisis of disclosure and help to restore families.

Probably the best book there is on Father-Daughter incest. Highly recommended for all interested in the subject.

A very clear, concise and informative way of explaining the complex and sometimes perplexing issues around incest. Readers who may have found the complicity of the victim incomprehensible may find new insight here. The only flaw I found in the book was the box within which it was written. The text explains things within it's own universe, but the analysis isn't quite global enough to allow it's dynamic application in the chaos of the real world, where motivations, temptations, emotions, etc. can all tangle quite intricately to further confuse the issues involved. Still, a very, I would even say indispensible treatise on the subject.