Customer Reviews

Fear of Fifty: A Midlife Memoir (Harperspotlight)

5 star:		(3)
4 star:		(1)
3 star:		(1)
2 star:		(3)
1 star:		(0)

 

 

I'm 50; that's what prompted me to pick up this book. I've only read 30 pages of Fear of Fifty so far, and am trying to decide whether to go on. So far Ms. Jong's main concern seems to be whether to get a face lift and whether her spa experience was spoiled by her husband. Most women, on their birthdays, get up and go to work. If they're lucky, their co-workers have a birthday card and maybe a cake for them. If they're really lucky their friends and/or family treat them to dinner out on the weekend preceeding or following their birthday. Wondering whether to get a facelift or spending the weekend at a spa isn't even a consideration. I am finding Ms. Jong's proclaimed need for spirituality, and more particularly her cry for women to unite rather than to divide, to be ringing hollow in light of her statement that married men are always available for affairs. Doesn't she realize that this is the oldest, most divisive issue between women? Doesn't she realize that when she has an affair with a married man she is enabling him to avoid confronting his marital problems and either repair his marriage or end it honorably? Doesn't she realize that she is injuring a fellow woman no matter how sympathetic she feels toward the man? I don't believe I am ultra-conservative. Rather, I have learned through hard experience that we owe it to ourselves and to our fellow human beings, both men and women, to not be enablers of negative behavior and to not seek thrills at the expense of others. Also, the cover promised lots of laughs. Well, I haven't laughed yet. Granted, I have nodded in agreement at many of Ms. Jong's generalizations about lack of spirituality and excess of greed in our culture, but I also read of here accounts of her homes (plural), travels, affairs, etc. I believe Ms. Jong speaks to a tiny minority of American women who are living a self-indulgent lifestyle, not to the majority who are working just to make ends meet for their families. In fairness, because I haven't read further, I could be pre-judging inacurately. I will probably read some more and/or skim a few chapters. If my impressons are changed, I'll write again and let you know. By the way, look at the author's picture on the back cover of the hardback -- she is posed in front of a backdrop of concrete monoliths -- a harsh cityscape with not one speck of nature in sight anywhere -- no wonder she feels disconnected and alientated. Who won't in that setting?

Having been born and spent my entire life in the South and being a lower middle class WASP, I envy those brash, brave, bold yankees who have the "ovaries" to speak their mind and lay their souls bare for all the world to see! WHAT A BOOK! I already love Erica's poetry and now I love her, too! As I am a forty-something boomer, I read this in anticipation of some much needed road-trip advice and boy, did I get what I asked for! Live your life according to your own conscience, follow your dreams AND your heart and baby don't look back in regret. Thank you, Erica, for being the fabulous writer and woman that you are. You're an inspiration to us all. Keep on writing!

This book was something of a disappointment, especially after Fear of Flying and Fanny. The good points are some funny Jewish jokes and the author's commendable honesty. Her description of dating married men is also witty and she has a sharp eye for ludicrous self-deception (in others). However, on the subject of feminism I found her to be surprisingly self-pitying, and there was something uncannily shallow in her descriptions of her various husbands and other partners. The many descriptions of Italy verge on a glossy travel guide and quickly become tedious. Not a book which yields any insight of value.

Firstly, let me point out that I am 21 years old, and almost didn't buy the book because I was afraid it would be some paean to "mid-life" that I just wouldn't get. The Jongroupie in me won out, though - and I am SO glad she did.

Anyone who has ever read an Erica novel, anyone who ever plans to, anyone who yearns to hear a profoundly female voice speak honestly yet comfortingly into her/his mind's ear - this is a must-have. Besides answering every "Where does Isadora end and Erica begin?" question, this book contains a good dozen touching poems, countless anecdotes, and the sweetly detailed account of how Erica met her current husband. Erica writes about being a writer, a Jew, a feminist, a scholar, a daughter, a mother, a wife - a WOMAN. It is a novel, I believe, about WOMANHOOD, first and foremost, from the pen of a woman who has seen hell and high water during her 50 years.

Far from being a boring mid-life memoir, the book reads like a novel and a really fun one at that, with all the feminine feminism, the wry jokes, the clever commentary and the juicy sex scenes of Erica's other books. Unlike her novels, however, this book draws the bold authoress out from between the lines and places her right before the reader - beautifully unembellished, womanly, young enough to take another ride on the rollercoaster and old enough to truly appreciate it.

Fear of Fifty is Erica Jong's best book. Fans will recognize all the memorable episodes of her life as she revisits them, this time through the eyes of a wiser woman.

It seems that Erica Jong has finally grown up. Gone is the obsession with sex and the dependence on men that characterized her earlier books. In this book, Ms. Jong comes to terms with the contradictions of her existence, and in so doing, very intelligently points out the wild contradictions of her generation and of our contemporary society.

The best section comes at the end, where Ms. Jong lays out her own personal feminist treatise. This section, although highly theoretical, is endowed with a clarity and passion that should rally every single woman reader, regardless of age, to the cause.

Ms. Jong quite rightly chastises women as well as men for causing and maintaining the feminist backlash. Encouraging harmony, comprehension and unity, she calls for a new feminism that would include all women regardless of class, race, age, sexual orientation or profession. She exalts the creativity and artistic or professional ability of women, as well as their capacity for motherhood and caretaking. In fact, she suggests that the two sides of a woman are complementary rather than imcompatible.

This book really clarified for me the situation of women in our Western society. I highly recommend it to anyone of any age interested in art, culture, literature, history or feminism. Although the content is highly intellectual in some respects, Ms. Jong's entertaining, passionate and humorous voice is always present. And it is absolutely not a "woman's book"; it is vital that as many men as possible read Fear of Fifty.

I read Fear of Flying many years ago, and it seems to me that this is just the same book rehashed.

Ms. Jong spends way too much time trying to show us how clever she is, and dropping the names of every famous person she has ever met.

The end result is that this book reads like a kind of blog. She makes many witty and very perceptive comments on the nature of relationships between the sexes, but comes across as a thoroughly obnoxious, self-absorbed individual whom one would NOT want to meet in real life.

In the end one has to feel thoroughly sorry for the various men who have loved her and married her, and sympathize totally with those who have dumped her. It would be really interesting (though impossible) to get THEIR inputs on what they thought was going on.

I've been reading Erica Jong's books for ages...probably a compulsion of some sort!! I find myself turning & returning to these books from time to time, when I'm feeling strange / down / lonely, because I feel as if I'm reading what an acquaintance or a far-away friend has written. This though doesn't mean that I appreciate all of her books the same, & it also doesn't mean that I think Erica Jong is an excellent writer. I just feel comfortable with her writing for some reason, although god knows why..

About "Fear of fifty": It seems to me that Erica Jong has written the same story, again & again. And again. And again, until frankly anyone, even the most well-intentioned person would get tired of it all. I was certainly enthusiastic about her writing at first. But what I think has happened is this-- beginning with "Fear of flying", & in all the books after that, what she has written really is her life story. As I said- really good & original to read the first time around (that's why "Fear of flying" is still Jong's best-selling book) but tedious after a while.

The heroine of "Fear of flying" seems to be in no way different from the woman shown in "Fear of fifty", & I have no idea why Erica Jong thought she had to write an autobiography. In "Fear of fifty" she just re-wrote the same things she'd already written in other books. I'm sure I'm no exception when I say that I was already familiar with all the themes in the book, & I knew what was coming, all the way through. This is the reason that I found "Fear of fifty" unoriginal & repetitive, although I must say that there was some comfort to be had in returning to these familiar themes. My point is--Erica Jong's ideas are interesting & her writing is (sometimes) inspired. But reading her books has been like eating the same food again & again: the first time around it was tasty. After a while, it got boring.

Comprehensive,wise and sensitive Woman is Erica Jong, besides a beautiful Spirit behind, she touches the soul of the fears and needs on Women and the realistic way of writing a beautiful biography that will trigger the awareness to Women to express and give their love to life and for Men to understand and learn to love them. Her poem is a delicate reminiscense to what some Men love on a real Woman. Congratulations Erica, just beautiful!.