Customer Reviews

Feel: The Power of Listening to Your Heart

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http://www.buzzardblog.com/buzzard_blog/2008/11/matthew-elliott.html

Three weeks ago I walked into Borders, eager to spend my $50 gift card. First, I picked up a book on Switzerland (I recently discovered that I'm Swiss). Next, I grabbed a biography of Genghis Kahn (for some reason I find Genghis fascinating). By my calculations I had about 10 bucks left to spend, so I sauntered into the "Christian" isle to see if anything caught my eye and, something did, a book called Feel.

This book surprised me.

Not only did I think a lot, I also felt a lot while reading Matthew Elliott's Feel.

Apparently, several years ago this fella Matthew Elliott did doctoral research on the role of emotion in the New Testament (wish I had thought of that). That research turned into Elliott's book Faithful Feelings, a book that examines the felt experience of Christian living, how emotion was viewed by the New Testament writers in their cultural context. That book was published in 2006. I hope to read it. John Piper calls the book, "The most thorough study on emotions in the New Testament."

Published earlier this year, Feel seems to be a popularization/distillation/fleshing out of Elliott's earlier work. The book is aimed at two significant errors Elliott observes in American Christianity:

1. "we have made our relationship with God more about fulfilling our duty than expressing our passion. We make our spiritual lives into a list of dos and don'ts. We pursue this list more than we actually pursue Jesus. And this leads to a life that eventually becomes tired and numb, devoid of feeling, dead."

2. "we have become indoctrinated in the belief that emotions are unreliable, dangerous, and bad."

From his study of Scripture, Elliott's book builds upon several key ideas:

* "our emotions were given to us by God to drive us to our best"
* "emotions are among the most logical and dependable things in our lives"
* "emotions give us a window to see truth like nothing else"
* "the true health of our spiritual lives is measured by how we feel"

If some of those statements trouble you, note that Elliott's writing reads like a modern day Religious Affections--Jonathan Edwards' 1746 classic which examines the centrality of emotions in Scripture and in the Christian life. Elliott is careful to ground his ideas, proposals, and conclusions in Scripture.

I really like this book. It affected me. It convicted me. It helped me. I'm celebrating God's providence, how he led me to peek into the "Christian" isle at Borders and spot Feel. Reading Feel has come with perfect timing. The thesis and thrust of the book hit a sanctification bullseye in me. I've already begun recommending this book to many of my friends.

Like with any book I deeply enjoy, I have a few quibbles with Feel. Chiefly, I wish Elliott had included a brief section near the beginning of the book that clearly articulates and unpacks the gospel message, serving those who will read this book and get excited about its content, but fail to digest it in a well formed gospel context. But, to be fair, the heart of the gospel is sprinkled and assumed throughout the book.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from Feel:

Jesus Christ brings to each of us a new set of information about the world around us. Without him, we have reason to fear and worry. With him, our emotions have a whole new context.

What we feel--our loves--reveals what we really believe and becomes the motivation for how we live.

...emotion does what a friend does--it counsels and advises...As we are conformed to Christ, we can learn to rely on emotions as we might rely on a friend.

Our emotional response to anything is a collage of our personality, upbringing, self-image, worldview, experiences, and beliefs. What we concentrate on, what we dwell on, what we run over and over again n our heads is what we get emotional about. So we need to stop and think about what we are always telling ourselves. If it does not line up with what is true, we must cancel the download. Then we need to reboot our thought patterns with godly values and beliefs. Only then can our emotions reflect a godly perspective.

Whatever podcast you play in your head is what you will eventually believe about God, others, and yourself. It will determine your emotional starting point and the place out of which you will respond. You can spend most of your life at a single spot emotionally because you pitched your tent on one thing that you relive and rehash every day. Sometimes, you have to make yourself pack it up and move on to something new.

Yup, that last quote is especially convicting, helpful, and freeing.

Here are a few of the endorsements for Feel:

Feel is an engaging book that's potentially liberating. God made emotions and Jesus expressed them; they need to be reclaimed and redeemed, not ignored or abandoned. Matthew Elliott does a service to the church through this thoughtful work.
-Randy Alcorn, author of Heaven and Deception

Many books today on the Christian life are baloney. Others just repackage what is widely known, or dress up tired platitudes with a new set of stories. This book is different. Based on solid research, it has truly fresh insights into our feelings and how God views them. I have been greatly helped personally by reading it, and I can't wait to pass it on to a bunch of other people who will eagerly receive its wisdom too. Best of all, in chapter after chapter, this book calls forth the godly feelings that, the author argues, God wants us to nurture and enjoy. Readers will discover here a path to enjoy God that they may never have glimpsed before.
-Robert Yarbrough, Ph.D., New Testament department chairman, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School

As Christians it is easy for us to elevate reason at the expense of authentic emotion -- and in the process lose our passion for the God who created both. Matthew Elliott helps us recapture what we've lost and discover what it truly means to feel. A timely message for our generation.
-Alex and Brett Harris, authors of Do Hard Things

I have always felt that as Christians we do not have enough balanced teaching about the subject of Emotion. I was so happy to see that my close friend and former traveling assistant Dr. Matthew Elliot has written a book on this subject. I want to urge you to read and think though what he has written. I pray that all of us will have a greater walk in truth and reality as result of reading this very very unique book.
-George Verwer, Founder Operation Mobilization

Three weeks ago I walked into Borders, eager to spend my $50 gift card. First, I picked up a book on Switzerland (I recently discovered that I'm Swiss). Next, I grabbed a biography of Genghis Kahn (for some reason I find Genghis fascinating). By my calculations I had about 10 bucks left to spend, so I sauntered into the "Christian" isle to see if anything caught my eye and, something did, a book called Feel.

This book surprised me.

Not only did I think a lot, I also felt a lot while reading Matthew Elliott's Feel.

Apparently, several years ago this fella Matthew Elliott did doctoral research on the role of emotion in the New Testament (wish I had thought of that). That research turned into Elliott's book Faithful Feelings, a book that examines the felt experience of Christian living, how emotion was viewed by the New Testament writers in their cultural context. That book was published in 2006. I hope to read it. John Piper calls the book, "The most thorough study on emotions in the New Testament."

Published earlier this year, Feel seems to be a popularization/distillation/fleshing out of Elliott's earlier work. The book is aimed at two significant errors Elliott observes in American Christianity:

1. "we have made our relationship with God more about fulfilling our duty than expressing our passion. We make our spiritual lives into a list of dos and don'ts. We pursue this list more than we actually pursue Jesus. And this leads to a life that eventually becomes tired and numb, devoid of feeling, dead."

2. "we have become indoctrinated in the belief that emotions are unreliable, dangerous, and bad."

From his study of Scripture, Elliott's book builds upon several key ideas:

* "our emotions were given to us by God to drive us to our best"
* "emotions are among the most logical and dependable things in our lives"
* "emotions give us a window to see truth like nothing else"
* "the true health of our spiritual lives is measured by how we feel"

If some of those statements trouble you, note that Elliott's writing reads like a modern day Religious Affections--Jonathan Edwards' 1746 classic which examines the centrality of emotions in Scripture and in the Christian life. Elliott is careful to ground his ideas, proposals, and conclusions in Scripture.

I really like this book. It affected me. It convicted me. It helped me. I'm celebrating God's providence, how he led me to peek into the "Christian" isle at Borders and spot Feel. Reading Feel has come with perfect timing. The thesis and thrust of the book hit a sanctification bullseye in me. I've already begun recommending this book to many of my friends.

Like with any book I deeply enjoy, I have a few quibbles with Feel. Chiefly, I wish Elliott had included a brief section near the beginning of the book that clearly articulates and unpacks the gospel message, serving those who will read this book and get excited about its content, but fail to digest it in a well formed gospel context. But, to be fair, the heart of the gospel is sprinkled and assumed throughout the book.

Here are a few of my favorite quotes from Feel:

Jesus Christ brings to each of us a new set of information about the world around us. Without him, we have reason to fear and worry. With him, our emotions have a whole new context.

What we feel--our loves--reveals what we really believe and becomes the motivation for how we live.

...emotion does what a friend does--it counsels and advises...As we are conformed to Christ, we can learn to rely on emotions as we might rely on a friend.

Our emotional response to anything is a collage of our personality, upbringing, self-image, worldview, experiences, and beliefs. What we concentrate on, what we dwell on, what we run over and over again n our heads is what we get emotional about. So we need to stop and think about what we are always telling ourselves. If it does not line up with what is true, we must cancel the download. Then we need to reboot our thought patterns with godly values and beliefs. Only then can our emotions reflect a godly perspective.

Whatever podcast you play in your head is what you will eventually believe about God, others, and yourself. It will determine your emotional starting point and the place out of which you will respond. You can spend most of your life at a single spot emotionally because you pitched your tent on one thing that you relive and rehash every day. Sometimes, you have to make yourself pack it up and move on to something new.

Yup, that last quote is especially convicting, helpful, and freeing.

Here are a few of the endorsements for Feel:

Feel is an engaging book that's potentially liberating. God made emotions and Jesus expressed them; they need to be reclaimed and redeemed, not ignored or abandoned. Matthew Elliott does a service to the church through this thoughtful work.
-Randy Alcorn, author of Heaven and Deception

Many books today on the Christian life are baloney. Others just repackage what is widely known, or dress up tired platitudes with a new set of stories. This book is different. Based on solid research, it has truly fresh insights into our feelings and how God views them. I have been greatly helped personally by reading it, and I can't wait to pass it on to a bunch of other people who will eagerly receive its wisdom too. Best of all, in chapter after chapter, this book calls forth the godly feelings that, the author argues, God wants us to nurture and enjoy. Readers will discover here a path to enjoy God that they may never have glimpsed before.
-Robert Yarbrough, Ph.D., New Testament department chairman, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School

As Christians it is easy for us to elevate reason at the expense of authentic emotion -- and in the process lose our passion for the God who created both. Matthew Elliott helps us recapture what we've lost and discover what it truly means to feel. A timely message for our generation.
-Alex and Brett Harris, authors of Do Hard Things

I have always felt that as Christians we do not have enough balanced teaching about the subject of Emotion. I was so happy to see that my close friend and former traveling assistant Dr. Matthew Elliot has written a book on this subject. I want to urge you to read and think though what he has written. I pray that all of us will have a greater walk in truth and reality as result of reading this very very unique book.
-George Verwer, Founder Operation Mobilization

http://www.buzzardblog.com/buzzard_blog/2008/11/matthew-elliott.html

From consumingworship.org

This was a bright spot in the latest round of review material. Honestly, this is one that I'm going to go back through with a fine-toothed comb for my own reading and learning pleasure because I felt I really just skimmed the surface for review purposes. As someone who grew up in a church tradition that downplayed the emotional side of faith, Feel was a very affirming read. I grew up in a culture that seemed scared of emotional displays in the context of faith, and I love Elliot's thesis (my own words here) that we are denying ourselves from a full life in Christ when we make our faith an intellectual/logical one and suppress our feelings.

The book is not a call to become hyper-sensitive and throw all critical thinking and logic out the window. There is a balance between reason and emotion that a healthy Christ-follower attains. The key is discernment as to whether or not a felt emotion is the correct emotion. Rather than use logic and reason as an instrument to squash emotions, use them to judge whether an emotional response is a godly one, and if it is don't impede it.

The author, Matthew Elliot, has a running blog here on the Amazon site and there is a special website set up for the book with extras here. Overall, I thought the book was a great read, thoughtfully put together. I would recommend it to anyone with questions regarding the relationship between faith and emotions.

Thanks to John Frame et al., I was predisposed to favor Elliot's overall argument about the emotions not being evolutionary baggage or a lesser faculty that we should try to suppress and bring into line behind our reason. However, I didn't particularly like his writing style, and I didn't find his discussion lucid or compelling. I wanted to be able to recommend this book as a corrective to hyper-intellectuals (especially most Calvinists), but I can't.

As an example, chapter 9 contains a section on cultivating the emotions of love, joy, hope, and hate. I found the first three of these to be unclear or contradictory. For instance, he talks about joy as happiness in contradistinction from joy as an intellectual bedrock apart from actual feelings of happiness. In his discussion, however, it seems like he is saying the same thing he says others shouldn't be saying.

On the other hand, chapter 10 was just the level of conciseness, argumentation, and focus that I wanted in the rest of the book. Perhaps Elliot needs a better editor to keep him on message and to help him clarify his arguments.

There is some helpful material in this book, but it did not meet my expectations or clarify the issues for me much. Fortunately, I read it in a discussion group that was much more helpful and interesting than was the book itself.

A few weeks ago I finished a book titled Feel by Matthew Elliott. Essentially the book is about debunking the myth that psychologists and now churches have put out that we need to follow reason or logic and not our emotions or feelings. The book was challenging for me. My entire life I had always thought back on my big mistakes as ones driven by emotions rather than a logical thought process. I have no doubt most of you have done the same. We think that it is because of our "heat in the moment" emotions that we make mistakes. Elliott has changed my thinking.

If I were to try and summarize how Elliott goes about changing my thinking I am sure I would do a poor job. Elliott uses scientific data, psychological studies, and Biblical studies on how emotions are viewed in the Bible. These things were more than convincing to me that I am ruining my relationship with Christ by living strictly through reason and logic. I am a very organizational person, I do not color outside of the lines. But I think I've been missing God's ability to speak to me through my emotions.

One interesting thing to note about the book is that it tries to incorporate blogging. At the end of each chapter their a section of personal responses and then include a link of where to join in the conversation. Often we think of blogging and books as two very separate things, but this book is trying to bridge the gap. I'm not sure if it liked it or not. Often, I found myself just skipping to the next chapter.

Overall: Great book, recommend it to anyone who feels like they are living an emotionless life.

[...]

The author, Matthew Elliott asserts "emotions help us navigate life better". His newest book Feel engages the heart and the mind and reflects all of life. It is refreshing to hear a "new" voice tackle the subject of emotions Biblically, intellectually and personally. Matthew's scholarly background and achievements definitely add credence to his positions. But fortunately for the average reader (like me) he doesn't hammer you with "academic" knowledge for knowledge's sake (or to impress or sway you solely based on his expertise - for those interested in a more in depth academic approach check out his book, Faithful Feelings). The writing style and approach of Feel is meant and is for all. Matthew's excellent use of examples from his own, family and friend's lives make it very personal and more pertinent to our own lives.

Throughout the text, I could actually "feel" the emotion of the author towards the subject and especially towards us, his readers. You get a deep sense of Matthew's fervent Christ-like love towards those he is trying to reach (which is everybody) with this truth.

Chapter 8 (which is my favorite overall) provides a Toolbox to guide the reader towards the practical / every day application of truth in their own emotional journey. No wise person would go into a life challenge without proper tools and also not be willing to use them as required.

To further encourage true heart (and life) change, I would recommend the companion Study Guide (available on the website [...] ) as an enhancement to the book. It contains additional references from God's Word, encourages deeper reflection on the assertions expressed in the book and then challenges application of what is taught in the book.

"Philosophy, psychology, our scientific culture, and the church have taught us that logic and reason must reign supreme, while feelings are trivialized and seen as something to be suppressed or ignored." ~ pg. 3

Matthew Elliott presents a very personal account of what it means to acknowledge your feelings and allow them to flourish in a safe environment. Currently I've been feeling some kind of awakening where I feel love for God like I never did before. So this book could not have found me at a better time. This book is about living a more fulfilled Christian life.

While emotions can take over your mind and body for days at a time it is important to know when a feeling is right and when it is wrong. Just think about how jealousy can at times drown out all other feelings. Then there is the emotion of love which is highly desired and appreciated as much when it is given as received.

Negative emotions can seems destructive except in cases where you feel righteous anger or hate sin as God does. Can a truly spiritual person allow themselves to feel anger, jealousy and hatred? When we love God, is it a feeling or an action? Do we show our love by following God's commandments or is it a feeling? I believe it is both. Matthew Elliott seeks a balanced approach and shows how fear, worry, anxiety, bitterness, rage, love of money and jealousy have a dark side, while anger and hate can have a positive side in the right context.

Reading this book gave me deeper insights into what it means to be human and what it means to reach for the divine. By weeding out the negative emotions you can come to a place of more peace and allow feelings like love to flourish in your soul's garden. When you strive for a balanced life and your feelings come naturally (vs. suppressing them) then I think you can be happier and more fulfilled. If you feel emotionally dead then this book can help to awaken feelings you have denied yourself. If you want to love God more then this book may also show you a way to a more pleasing and peaceful relationship with our Creator.

~The Rebecca Review

How was your day? How are you feeling? What are you feeling? And does it matter? Does it count in your spiritual life, or should we lay aside our feelings and just do what needs to be done?

In this book, the author's voice doesn't feel preachy, even as he is preaching a new perspective on our emotions, our reason, our beliefs and feelings. I'm getting a little tired of the preachy ones, the books that spend half the pagecount telling me what's wrong (most of which I already know since I picked up the book in the first place) and then the rest of the pages never quite live up to a proper response or countermeasure to what was wrong in the first place. From the beginning of this one, I've gotten a different feel - from the very start, we need to incorporate our feelings, need to stop fearing real emotion, and as we read along together we can see what a difference can be made.

"For those who argue that love, joy, and hope are not feelings, the logic is usually quite simple: Emotion is this feeling we have little control over - you cannot command a feeling. Therefore, the love or joy or hope that God commands in the Bible (nobody doubts that God commands love and joy) couldn't be emotions." (p. 17)

[But] "I wondered how I'd react if I went to church one Sunday and heard, 'God is telling you that next week you should be filled with happiness and good cheer; you need to give genuine, warm hugs every night to your family; and if something really bad happens to a friend in the church, you need to be over at their house crying with them. No, I don't mean dropping by a card or a casserole for dinner, your Christian duty. I mean entering into their pain and really crying with them.' Paul is that teacher. And that is what I learned from him in Romans. To him, a Christian's emotional life is all rolled up in and with and around how we should behave and how we should think... So feel. And feel deeply." (p. 25)

From this opening thesis, Elliott speaks from the heart, speaks to the heart. My feelings are real, and it's not a wishy-washiness that sometimes substitute for emotion. It's something beyond just sentimentalism, too. We talk about real joy, but rarely find it. We want to share the hurts of others, but rarely know where to start. And I think we want this Christian life to be more meaningful than simply following the rules. We would rather have grace and love overflow from lives so full of God we can't stand it - we want Jesus' promised abundant life. But most of the time, we can't find it, much less live it, live out of it.

"Emotional moments and emotional understanding often lead to the greatest clarity in our thinking and understanding. These are the lightbulb moments. They capture the truth in a snapshot, as no amount of rational thinking can." (p. 54)

I need more of those lightbulb moments, more opportunities for real life. Because the way I feel does matter. My angst matters, and my joy matters. My encouragement is real, and the junk really hacks me off. Rejoicing together, mourning together, enjoying each other and living out the journey together - somehow, I think it's what we're all looking for, whether we believe it or not.

A couple of weeks ago I went to my mailbox and received a pleasant surprise - a book in the mail! The book, called "Feel" is written by Mathew Elliot. I wasn't familiar with the book, nor the author but on the jacket were recommendations from men I highly respect such as professor Steve Brown and author Randy Alcorn. Now my curiosity was peeked. But as I began to read this book, my initial curiosity was replaced with excitement and enthusiasm.

Why was I excited? Because this book couldn't have come at a more timely moment in my life. This past year God has been doing a fresh work on my heart. And although I don't have the capacity to share all that God has done, suffice it say - I have allowed God to do some renovation work and open my heart and as a result learning how to feel in new ways.

That is the premise of this book - the power of listening to one's heart. In the book, Elliot unpacks the modern church's penchant which teaches us to suppress our emotions and to distrust feelings.

In "Feel", Elliot encourages us to get in touch with our emotional side, by using various Biblical examples. Elliot says it is difficult, if not impossible to "have life, and to have it more abundantly" if we simply keep all our emotions hidden.

This quote from A.W. Tozer used by Elliot, communicates the power and importance of the heart and feelings.

But many spiritual leaders through the centuries got it right. We need to recapture some of the truths they taught. In the words of A.W. Tozer, 'A state of emotion always comes between the knowledge and the act...God intended that truth should move us to moral action. The mind receives ideas, mental pictures of things as they are. These excite the feelings and these in turn move the will to act in accordance with the truth...But be sure that human feelings can never be completely stifled. If they are forbidden their normal course, like a river they will cut another channel through the life and flow out to curse and ruin and destroy.'

One cool addition in Elliot's book are the "Blog" comments and real life testimonies at the end of each chapter. That feature gives the book an interactive feel and personal touch.

Besides having read Jonathan Edwards' classic book, "Religious Affections", I haven't come across many, if any, books that have been willing to address this subject in such a comprehensive and honest way.

"Feel" is definitely worth the read and a worthwhile investment in your spiritual journey.

Also, you will definitely want to visit his website at FaithfulFeelings.com.

At his website, Mathew has provided a very helpful study guide that you can download for small groups and for personal study.

[...]

Feel is a fascinating foray into the seemingly untouched reaches of emotion in our everyday lives. Encouraging us to sense and follow the emotions that we are given, author Matthew Elliott brings us through the history of emotions from Plato, to Jonathan Edwards, to even Malcolm Gladwell. With a philosophical understanding of the topic of emotion, Elliott walks us through the necessity of experiencing life as an emotional opportunity with the care of a loving father. Feel is pivotal work for any wary soul searching for clarity to the muddied mix of a stoic spirituality and a frenetic culture.

What makes this work even more accessible to the reader are the inclusion of reader "blogs" both in the book and online at faithfulfeelings.com. If you are still searching for a reason to get your hands on this beautifully designed book, buy it for the incredible discussions it will produce within whatever community you call your own.

I wish everyone could read this book to understand both the freedom and responsibility we have in our emotions! With passion and intelligence, the author opens your eyes to a fresh perspective of the importance emotion plays in our lives both physically and spiritually. His captivating voice uses stories and research to explain the deeper truth that feelings point to reality not distract from it.
I am so thankful someone has written a book that encourages us see our emotional response to life as a good thing!